Seattle drivers have begun their drive-by counter-offensive in the War on Cars.
As dutifully reported by North Precinct officer Adam D Beatty, at 12:30 AM on Sunday, May 15: “[The bicyclist stated that he] approached the intersection of 4 Ave and Lenora ST as the light turned red. The black sedan stopped and a [man] exited the vehicle and punched [the rider] in the face four times. [The bicyclist] fell to the ground and the unknown male got back in the vehicle and left. The only further description [the rider] could provide is that the suspect was ‘a handsome man.'”
Beatty continues: “[The bicyclist] was riding with a friend; however, his friend did not witness the assault.”
The police report doesn’t speculate on why the driver might have chosen this time and place to launch a counteroffensive. (Could the driver have caught wind of David Hiller’s new job?) Cyclists around the city are advised to be wary of handsome men.
As a handsome man, I am deeply offended by this profiling.
As a handsome man who rides a bicycle, I am deeply conflicted.
the cyclist must have asked for it by scoffing at a law.
Maybe the guy boffed the other guy’s wife, and it had nothing to do with transporation modes.
FUCK YOU STRANGER! You guys have totally fucking ignored the controversy over Hiller’s hiring and the Mayor’s instruction to media to leave him alone. But now you want to point to “collateral damage” caused by the controversy?
What a sad little weekly you are. Please visit the other media agency on the area to learn how to attempt to be journalist.
10-to-1 sez Mr Slowass Cyclist prevented Dr Punchy McFists from getting through that yellow light — and continuing off on his very important way — before it could turn to red.
@5. Thank you for sharing your thoughtful, insightful viewpoint. We have all learned a great deal from your wisdom.
I think we can safely eliminate Kucinich … but this sounds exactly like something Schwarzenegger would do!
Don’t tase me bro!
@9 Once again, master of the non sequitur
@5 – The Hiller story? They haven’t even caught up with the Venoy Overton story.
Update: assailant “more dapper than handsome”.
Police photofit: http://bit.ly/dqUQMG
@10 you’re welcome.
Hey, guys, Friday is Bike To Work Day. Let’s get number one this year!
As a rough-hewn, feral-looking cyclist, I am mildly enraged.