Virtually every book on every topic is sent by publishers to The
Stranger for review—way more than could possibly be covered
by a weekly paper. There are stacks and stacks of crappy-looking books
in the office, mostly embossed-cover mystery/crime novels,
inspirational stories, and new-age self-help manuals claiming fresh
ideas to renovate your life. The other week, I noticed two books with
strikingly similar covers—orange text,
baby-blue-fading-into-white backgrounds—offering the same reward:
a lesson. These were books The Stranger would normally never review, yet I felt strangely compelled to compare
and contrast what a dog and a disabled boy could teach me. My curiosity
was overwhelming.
Lessons from Jacob: A Disabled Son Teaches His Mother About
Courage, Hope, and the Joy of Living Each Day to the Fullest is
the story of a boy born with Canavan disease. Canavan is a fatal
genetic neurodegenerative disorder that usually claims its victims by
age 4. It renders the children nearly helpless: They can’t see, speak,
walk, eat, or even lift their heads. Jacob’s crowning physical
achievement in the story is when he is able to push a button of his own
free will, activating a fan that blows out his birthday candles. The
book, written by his mother, is an account of what it’s like to care
for Jacob, and how the responsibility of looking after someone who is
helpless dominates every aspect of her life. Although she tries hard to
point out all the love and warmth Jacob brings her, you can’t help but
be deflated by the everyday strains she is forced to endure.
The main lesson she offers is to “take a situation, any situation,
and make it positive.” This is a lesson that anyone could have guessed
without reading a page. The book’s real lesson is this:
Although it is possible to receive love from an immense burden, if that
burden can be prevented, it should be. Canavan is a genetic disorder.
If both parents have the recessive gene, there is a one-in-four chance
their children will be born with the disease. The second time Schwartz
got pregnant, she had the fetus screened, and sure enough, it had
Canavan as well. So she chose the only logical option: She terminated
the pregnancy. After that, she went on to have two healthy, normal
babies. She then went on to start an organization that provides free
Canavan screening for all pregnant mothers in Canada. She hopes that,
over time, the disease will be eliminated altogether.
Ted Kerasote has nothing to say about disabled children, though he
has plenty to say about a golden-retriever mix he found abandoned in
the mountains. In Merle’s Door: Lessons from a Freethinking
Dog, every aspect of his relationship with Merle is recounted and
hypothesized upon. What Kerasote has remembered and cataloged about his
dog is so exhaustive it might almost be sad, not to mention boring, if
he didn’t back up his stories with fascinating philosophies and
historical accounts of dog psychology.
Merle was raised in the wide-open lands of Wyoming, where he was
free to make his own decisions and learn from his mistakes. He is proof
that a dog left to his own devices (more or less) can be a thoughtful,
self-disciplined companion. The lessons Kerasote learned from Merle
“weren’t so much about giving dogs physical doors to the outside,
although that is important, but about providing ones that open onto the
mental and emotional terrain that will develop a dog’s potential.”
Likewise, when people are free to live and learn without arbitrary
boundaries, human life is more profound and meaningful. Our potential
as living creatures can be realized only when we are not caged in. When
walls are put up and we are prohibited from making important decisions
for ourselves—like, say, terminating a pregnancy because the
child will be a helpless, massive burden—we lose our capacity to
make life better for ourselves. Merle teaches us that a dog, or any
being really, has limitless, unexpected potential if he is given the
freedom to learn for himself. Jacob teaches us that we should love what
we have been given, but that the life of a parent should never be
encumbered in the way Ellen Schwartz’s is if it doesn’t have to be.
Unwittingly, a disabled boy and a freethinking dog have come
together to teach us all an important lesson about a woman’s right to
choose. 