I was relieved when those studies came out last year saying humans
aren’t nearly as good at multitasking as we think we are. I know I’m
better when I focus on one thing at a time. That’s why I decline to
book professional sessions with couples. I’m fine with couples
employing a professional to fulfill their threesome
fantasy—and it’s always flattering to be asked—but I
find the complexities outweigh the pleasures. When I asked other sex
workers about seeing couples, though, I found that I seem to be in the
minority.
Angela: “I do see couples and enjoy it very much.”
Sally: “It’s a delight!”
Melinda: “I do, and I’d like to see more couples!”
Zabrina: “I see some couples. But even though I’m a lesbian, I’m not
always into it. I like goth/punk/suicide girls. The Bellevue-mommy
type is not a turn-on. They don’t become regulars, either. But even
if they’re new, I do feel it’s safer if there’s a woman there.”
Zabrina is speaking of the belief, common to many sex workers, that
meeting a couple is safer than meeting a single man. “Safer” because
female vice cops are busy posing as prostitutes themselves, not
helping entrap them, and Craigslist Killers don’t bring their
girlfriends. Woman as a civilizing influence? Maybe, but I wouldn’t
hang my hat on it.
But beyond basic safety, there are subtler challenges—like
making sure everyone’s on board with the whole idea.
Melinda: “If the man calls, I want to talk to the woman before they
book. The times sessions haven’t gone well were when I let the man tell
me his woman was interested without checking for myself, and she was
not.”
Sally: “Yes, I always speak with both parties before scheduling to
ensure that there’s equal enthusiasm for the date.”
Angela: “It’s important that nobody feels left out. Most often the
woman hasn’t been with another girl before. It’s a delicate matter; so
if she’s nervous, I’ll bring her a flower or something to break the ice
a bit. If she’s still the weakest link, then I’ll do my best to
seduce her but not scare her!”
Melinda: “I worry about female jealousy. I always ask permission of
the wife before doing too much with her husband, to make sure she
hasn’t changed her mind. It sounds hot to watch your man with
another woman, but in the moment it could feel different.”
In the end, one has to understand the limits of the situation.
Sally: “[They get to] play with others without the hassle and
potential drama of the swing communities and feel secure in their
relationship afterward. As the saying goes, I get paid to leave.”
Angela: “I like to keep the thought that they both equally chose to
see me, even though it may not be entirely true. I’d like to believe
that these interludes go very well, but it’s impossible to tell
what’s really going on in each of their heads.” 
why a threesome is in nearly everybody’s mind two women and a man?? I fins this preposterous….
2menonewomanfan: While I do agree that most people automatically assume a f/m/f situation in a threesome please do remember that this article is speaking specifically about couples hiring a sex worker, and sex workers are predominatly female. Also, a f/m/f combination is most prevalent in the media, so it is deemed a more ‘acceptable’ fantasy than a m/f/m combination. Personally, I am a fan of both.
Also, it seems like when I hear about MMF threesomes it’s not as often bisexual in nature. Often the two guys just share a girl or one guy watches someone play with his significant other.
FFM threesomes seems to more often have interaction between the same sex a goal, so the dynamics are going to be different. Granted I am generalizing based on what I’ve read and heard about in real life, as we all are.
I had thought Mistress Matisse does see couples, but not individual women. I was hoping to book an session with her and my boyfriend when I visit Seattle. I guess she doesn’t see couples anymore though.. Bummer
This is on the sessions page on Mistress Matisse’s website:
http://www.mistressmatisse.com/sessions.…
Q Do you see couples/women?
A. I very much enjoy seeing couples, whether the woman is dominant or submissive.
Perhaps it should be updated if this is not the case.
This is posted on the sessions page of Mistress Matisse’s website.
Q Do you see couples/women?
A. I very much enjoy seeing couples, whether the woman is dominant or submissive.
http://www.mistressmatisse.com/sessions.…
Perhaps it should be updated if this is no longer the case.
I’ve (non-professionally) gone out with multiple m/f couples, and dated a couple of poly guys who have female primaries, and I have yet to meet the couple where the woman is as enthusiastic about the arrangement as the man. I know they must exist, because I’ve BEEN the equally-enthusiastic woman. But I’ve never found another one. Which ends up feeling gross.
I think the point here is about seeing couples for sex, whereas Matisse’s website is about seeing couples for BDSM. I could be wrong, but it seemed like this column was more about sexual contact than BDSM play.
Hold on guys, there are more than two kinds of threesomes out there — what about all male, or all female, or those including people of a less-easily defined gender? Clearly all male threesomes don’t apply well to our Mistress, but still. It’s in the way we use our language.
I say Rah Rah Rah for other kinds of threesomes! Yay!
Having had several MFM threesomes, I must say they can be absolutely fantastic. They tend to go best when the guys can have a “comraderie” with one another. Bi-guys seem to be able to do this pretty well with my pretty straight husband. He is not convinced that straight (White) guys have the same motivations, though, or the same comfort level with other another guy’s body parts being near them.
Maybe those guys you mentioned in another column can make a real speciality out of this eventually! Yum!