To the fat, ignorant fuck who made a goddamn fool of himself in front of the lesbian bar: I hate you. I’m sure you felt that the women in front of the bar deeply offended you, but it’s so fucking obvious to everyone except yourself that their lifestyle terrifies you because it leaves you feeling impotent and obsolete—things I can assure you that you’ve successfully accomplished on your own. It’s impressive you fit into that neat little box of overcompensating, closeted rage—white male, mid-20s, fat, backward baseball cap, collared shirt, red-faced, drunk, hateful, ranting about sex. This might be a difficult realization for you, but I’m pretty certain the women did NOT “want some of this” as you artfully gestured to your groin. When they expressed disgust for your sad, tiny cock, perhaps you thought calling them dykes would win them over. But to no avail—they called the police and you walked around in circles with your chest puffed out AS IF they would be intimidated or impressed. Then you quickly excused yourself (ran away) while calling insults behind you? God, you embarrassed yourself. If I see you mouth off again, I’m coming down with my cast-iron pan and taking out your knees, you fucking pathetic ogre. 
I, Anonymous
Ladies’ Man
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If you kept the curtains to your kitchen closed you wouldn’t have these problems.
I only did this because I was drunk and my buddy offered me 40 bucks. There’s nothing special about you, you were just in the wrong place when we decided to be assholes. Rest assured though, we had great laugh at imitating the look at your face over pancakes at the IHOP. Clam.
I only did this because I was drunk and my buddy offered me 40 bucks. There’s nothing special about you, you were just in the wrong place when we decided to be assholes. Rest assured though, we had great laugh at imitating the look at your face over pancakes at the IHOP. Clam.
@50:
There is plenty of anti-gay/misogynistic sentiment in all American racial groups, but if you told me about some guy drunkenly yelling at a bunch of women at a lesbian bar and then asked me to guess his race, I would guess that he was probably white.
I don’t think this is based on self-loathing (I am white) as much as years of observation of drunk assholes of various races.
In other words, the fact that this guy was white (unlike his being fat) has some actual relevance (the author was describing him as typical of the type of guy who exhibits such behavior).
Of course, it would have been just as pc for a woman of color to talk smack about this guy’s being white, so your comment does touch upon a wider issue (why it’s OK for “them” to talk smack about “us” but not vice versa)- but one which should probably be the subject of its own thread so we don’t go off the rails here.
As to why this conduct is more typical of white guys … I have my own theories but would like to hear the author state hers first.
“It’s not that the majority of fat, mid-twenties, white males are insecure and overcompensating by being major douches; it’s that the majority of douches are fat, mid-twenties, white males.”
That is fucking pathetic. Really. Get out of the Witchy Woman bookstore more often.
Queefaroni by Chef Boy-U-Stink
@42 hear, hear, chubby chaser.
@47/@48 I’ve got a beef with your puns & I’ll make you eat your words.
@27
“birth control…. as well as many vegetables”
So fat folks are fat because of thyroid issues ?
and thyroid issues are caused by eating veggies?
and thyroid issues are from not getting pregnant???
So fat folks are fat because of eating veggies? Is THAT what you just said?
And fat folks are fat because they Aren’t pregnant?
hhhooooKay. Just make sure to get your passport stamped before you leave Planet Crazy, ok?
I don’t hate you because you’re fat, you’re fat because I hate you.
@40: Tired of A-holes:
RIGHT OHN!!!!!!