I am a fairly successful man. I don’t make bank like Wall Streeters back in the day, but I haven’t
been hungry since college. My girlfriend is younger. We met when she
was in grad school. Like many recent grads, she’s not steadily
employed, in debt, and driving an unsafe car. So I support her, house
her, feed her, and pay her bills (medical, etc.). She needed to pay off
her credit-card debt—28 percent interest rate!—so she took
work stripping and later as an escort. Through escorting she was able
to pay off her credit-card debt in a month.

Now some guys would find this distressing,
but I found it kind of hot. Here’s the thing: After she paid off her
credit-card debt, she stopped escorting. I’d like her to continue
part-time until she finds a career. She’s mixed on this. We would like
to buy a house and make things more permanent, but our income isn’t
enough to do that if she’s making waitress wages. I guess it boils down
to this: I would prefer to be with a sex worker than a waitress. I’d
rather she make $200/hour on her back than $10/hour on her feet. She
says she has issues with sex work. What do you think?

Perhaps I’m Mildly Perverted

I don’t think it’s up to me, PIMP, or you.
And I would hope that your girlfriend, who’s financially dependent on
you at the moment, doesn’t return to sex work because she feels
coerced.

But I can certainly appreciate your point of
view. There are men out there who’re turned on by the idea of their
girlfriends/wives having sex with other men; some men are turned on by
the idea of their girlfriends/wives being paid for sex. You’re clearly
one of those guys. And you’re within your rights to share this
information with your girlfriend and to try to convince her to return
to sex work. Because your fantasies of sex work—of her doing sex
work—turn you on. And, again, that’s fine. But you could make a
more convincing case, PIMP, if you were better acquainted with the
realities of sex work.

You should start sucking off strange men for
money.

You’ll have to service men, I’m
afraid—while lots of men fantasize about being paid to have sex
with women, there’s a fatal supply-and-demand problem. Simply put:
There are just too many men out there willing to give it away for free.
That created a glut on the supply side, which has distorted the market,
as there’s more than enough free straight cock out there to meet the
needs of straight women.

So you’ll be giving head to dudes, PIMP. And
after you’ve choked down a few hundred loads, you can go back to the
girlfriend and say, “Sex work isn’t so bad!” with some credibility. And
if you keep doing sex work after you’ve sucked off scores of men you’re
not attracted to—men who may or may not have treated you with
respect, men who may have very different standards of personal hygiene
than you do—that might convince your girlfriend to continue to
pursue sex work for your amusement.

Good luck.

Hello! I have been in a
relationship with my boyfriend for about a year and a half. It is
amazing! We are both very GGG, and it is by far the best sexual
relationship I have ever had. But there is one thing that has been
bugging me, and it’s the only thing I feel like I can’t share with him.
My boyfriend really enjoys tossing my salad. I enjoy it! We love it!
Here’s the problem: He kisses me when he is done.

Now I am not one of these people who is
grossed out about sex-related things. I love it messy and sloppy. If he
kisses me after eating my pussy, I’m fine with that. But kissing me
after he eats my ass? I hate it! It tastes awful! It ruins the rest of
the sex for me! I’ve heard the old “Well, imagine what it tastes like
for him” adage, but he really does enjoy it, and I do, too… just not
the kissing after. I’m not sure what to do about this. I am afraid that
telling him would offend him and that he will stop doing it. (I do like
having my salad tossed!) Am I being selfish? Should I tell him? Suck it
up?

Bad Taste In My Mouth

One never permits one’s boyfriend—or
one’s youth pastor or one’s president—to place his tongue in
one’s butt if it isn’t clean and fresh. Because when one allows one’s
boyfriend to stick his tongue in one’s butt, BTIMM, one is vouching for
the edibility of one’s ass. When one consents to having one’s salad
tossed—are people referring to anilingus in that way
again?—one is saying to one’s partner, “My ass is clean enough
for your mouth. Have at it.”

It is entirely reasonable for one’s
boyfriend—or one’s youth pastor or one’s president—to
assume that if one’s butt is clean enough to receive his tongue, his
tongue is clean enough, post-salad-tossing, to be received in the mouth
of the person whose salad he has just tossed.

So are you are being selfish? Perhaps you
are. But we are, each of us, allowed a hang-up or two. You should
inform the boyfriend that you’re not into kissing after anal-oral
contact. But you must present this news to him as your problem,
not his, as a hang-up of yours. If he likes you well enough, and
enjoys eating your ass as much as he seems to, he may be willing to
take a few extra steps—mouthwash on the nightstand? A quick swipe
with a warm washcloth?—to accommodate your squeamishness.

What is the proper condom
etiquette for threesomes? In my case, I’m a guy and it would be with
two girls. Do I change condoms when I go from one girl to the other? It
seems like that would be a hassle. It’d kill the spontaneity.

No Clever Acronym

First, a general point: Spontaneity is
overrated. The best sex often requires advance planning; the more
people involved, or props involved, the more planning required.
Although threesomes, for example, can sometimes “just happen” (often
when three young people “just happen” to get drunk), most threesomes
require some advance planning (particularly when adults want to have
them). Finding the third, vetting the third, establishing the ground
rules, talking about safety, etc.—all of that requires advance
planning.

On to your specific question, NCA: You are
going to have to change condoms when you hop from one girl to the
other. Unless, of course, you’re a total asshole and you only care
about protecting your own health and you don’t give a shit about
exposing Girl A to any sexually transmitted infections that Girl B
might have or vice versa. Neither girl should sleep with you if you
refuse to swap out condoms, and you should remind yourself that, just
as Paris was worth the hassle of a mass, realizing the number-one
straight-male fantasy of all time is worth the hassle of swapping out
condoms.

But you do have another option: the female
condom. It’s a condom that she wears. I’ve used them—with
dudes—and once you get past the slightly creepy trash-can-liner
aspect of using them, they work fine. Stuff one in each girl, and
you’ll be able hop back and forth to your heart’s content without
pausing to change condoms. There’s more info about the female condom at
www.femalehealth.com.

mail@savagelove.net

125 replies on “Savage Love”

  1. Final Jeopardy question: Can one ever *truly* be sure that one’s back door is actually clean? I mean, ya can’t see back there and there are creases. Lots of ’em. Poo can hide.

  3. I have a problem with the answer to PIMP, since it seems to presume that escorting for women is the heterosexual male equivalent of swallowing cum from hundreds of men—meaning that escorting is like being abused. It’s a stupid analogy, and surprisingly puritanical for this column.

  4. PIMP- What did this girl major in while in college? I know the economy’s bad and all, but I bet she has other skills besides waitressing and escorting, especially if she has a master’s degree! If she’s not comfortable with the escorting, you should be more supportive in helping her find a better career.

  5. I agree with Dan’s endorsement in letter 3. Female condoms are awesome, especially if you’re latex sensitive (like me) and your partner has a large penis (like my husband).

  6. Suggesting that someone suck off many strange men (and swallow, to boot!) may be many things, clembot, but “puritanical” is certainly not one of them.

  7. Dan’s advice is a little easy on NCA, while I definitely would have driven home the “changing condoms is not optional” point, I also would have reminded him that just because he’s the only guy in the mix doesn’t necessarily entitle him to be the center of attention. Depending on what his female partners want, he may not even get the opportunity switch.

    Measured expectations, NCA. Measured expectations.

  8. Dan, your reply to PIMP was genius! Still ROTFLMAO! (This is why I no longer read Savage Love at work–too risky.)
    On a more serious note, regarding PIMP, I second the advice from #4: the economy is tough, but if she is truly uncomfortable with sex work she is better off waitressing or something instead. If you cannot handle that, PIMP, perhaps you and your girlfriend have a values clash that cannot be overcome…

  9. In the PIMP letter, everybody should ask the question, what does “mixed” mean? She has “mixed” emotions about escorting. That really isn’t the same as being uncomfortable, which is by definition a constant, though mild, bad feeling. Being “mixed” implies ambivalence, that she sees pros and cons in the job. We are given no other information about why she is “mixed”. Perhaps the original email is longer and explains that better, but we have nothing else to go on from here. And surely, if there were some terrible cause for her feeling “mixed” shouldn’t that have been included somewhere in the letter?

    Perhaps the negatives that make her feel “mixed” are the hours, customers that she doesn’t like personally, her employer, or that society looks down on the job—complaints that could be applied to many other jobs that you wouldn’t compare to cum swallowing. In fact, Dan is only adding to the shaming of the job with his comparison.

    However, I wonder how anybody could feel “mixed” about a job that involved something terrible or traumatic. That doesn’t make much sense. If your job involves one horrible reality that is a constant part of the job, I don’t believe you would feel “mixed”.

    Mixed also suggests that she sees positives in the job, and obviously no straight male could see anything positive about swallowing a lot of cum. Which is why Dan’s analogy is so much less incisive than what I have come to expect from this column.

  10. Eating ass is a great way to learn more about the fecal-oral route of disease transmission, firsthand. Kissing someone with a mouth just used on an anus is a great way to give that person diseases as well, even though the bacteria comes from another part of their own body.

    Remember: by weight, the majority of poo is bacteria. Even though some of it is dead, much of it is alive, and some of that quantity is disease-causing. Consider Saran Wrap, OK? Because “vouching” that your ass is clean does not necessarily mean much. A good shower is a great step towards cleanliness, but as a public health professional, my considered opinion is that this is probably not sufficient.

  11. Please someone prove me wrong in my statement (without using anecdotal stories):

    Women are MUCH less sexually liberated than men.

    Why would anyone have a threesome without knowing the third’s sexual disease prevalence? Are threesomes that random? If so, shit, I need to get out more…

  12. “Mixed” was his term, not hers, fucknut. Obviously she wasn’t too keen on it or she’d keep doing it for that kind of money, wouldn’t she? Bottom line, it’s not his decision, and he truly is a pimp if he thinks it is. He should get out there and hustle his ass if he’s so hungry for extra cash.

  13. ^
    clembot…
    I think you hit (very thoughtfully) the nail on the head with that one. Perhaps he was fearing a female backlash, because he also stated “But I can certainly appreciate your point of view”
    so, the response zigzaged a bit actually.
    I dont think escorts HAVE to do anything they dont want to actually… I mean, I”m sure their are all different types up for all different folks… and in any job, them more shit you are willing to take, the more people give you,,, the less you take, the less you usually are given… but thats beside the point.
    good response… he answer wasnt too pro….
    its a knee jerk reaction to slander this guy… and perhaps he need a bit of a wake up call…? perhaps?

  14. oh… and as far as eating ass goes…
    I’ve eaten a lot of ass w all my gfs and I dont know about this breath or mouth tasting bad afterwards… ? The ass I ate, just ‘tasted’ like ‘flesh’ or ‘body’ more or less… not a lot of ‘shit’ really…. if the person is clean then eating ass is not really dirty. I mean… ok, sure, its a bit dirty… I agree… but I NEVER EVER, came up from down there… with anything smelly… maybe its just the girls I date… beautiful asian girls with assholes that taste like flowers…. maybe I’m just lucky that way

  15. Sophia, as a public health professional I am surprised by your irresponsible statements regarding poop. From Reference.com “feces or excrement or stools – Solid bodily waste discharged from the colon through the anus during defecation. Normal feces are 75percnt water. The rest is about 30percnt dead bacteria, 30percnt indigestible food matter, 10–20percnt cholesterol and other fats, 10–20percnt inorganic substances, and 2–3percnt protein.” I’m not sure about bacteria’s “weight by volume” but your response surely seems to be more of a fearful, digust based response than what you imply by stating you are a “health” worker.

    I’m not into shit, for sure, but if shit were as dangerous as you imply, animals and people would be dropping dead left and right!

    With proper cleanliness there is nothing dangerous or unclean about a rim job. As Dan stated it is the recipients responsibility to insure the area is ready. If you even think you need to have a bowel movement, do it before and clean up afterwards, preferably with soap and water!

    A rim job is a great component for a fun night of sex. For me both fun to give AND receive. Sounds like you need to get over your hang ups and go have fun with your husband/partner. Perhaps beeng a bit GGG will get you the night of your life!

  16. Thanks for your advice to NCA. If I’d had two correctly connected neurons when I was 18, I would have realized the guy needed to change condoms when he changed girls – and I wouldn’t have caught HPV from my best friend when we were in college.

  17. Reading the first lines of PIMP’s I had a undefined feeling of discomfort. I greatly felt PIMP that you are patronizing her : i am a successful man versus she is young, jobless and drives an unsafe car and owes a lot. Then comes the person with a shining armor, I feed her, I house her and pay her medical bills. I feel that you are owning her and there fore she must “succumb” to your desires. In a few words you are a male chauvinist pig. For you, women are sex objects born to satisfy your inner fantasies. I can’t even remember that you tried to help her find a job, suggest her to buy another car, to re-finance her credit card debt (you are working on wall street aren’t you). Her only alternatives are a slut or a waitress… there must be something in between… but no for you, the most important thing is to make sure that she is beneath you… I do not think this is a serious basis for building a long, lasting and trust based relationship. Dump the poor girl and open a brothel… may be on Battery park , i am sure you are going to be able to pay the mortgage .

  18. Wow, lots of righteous feminist rage there, chaya760. I’ve gone through liberal-arts education ringer, and I’ve discovered that you can deconstruct pretty much any text & twist it to find meaning to support your own good/evil extremist views. It’s a good thing you’re not an advice columnist. People need real, practical advice that respects their desires, calls them on their shit, but always with the sincere wish that these people can go on to live healthy, happy, sex-fulfilling lives. Deconstructing people’s desires to fulfill your own needs of righteous indignation is rarely helpful to anyone.

    Yeah, the world is fucked up, what a revelation, give yourself a star for today. But pointing accusing fingers only swirls the shit around, it doesn’t clean it up.

  19. On condom switches: Def. not optional, and the same goes if you plan to fuck the same woman twice. Condoms are not meant to be reused, they’re meant to be disposed of once there’s sperm inside them. Using them a second time reduces safety, both in regard to pregnancy & STDs, and as safety is the point of using them = you SHALL AND MUST change it, or chances are it will rip and/or leak. Should be taught in school…

  20. In regards to PIMP’s situation, I think the “mixed” comment is pretty key actually. If he really was supporting her, and she finally found a way to reduce that support or eliminate it, of course that would be a benefit because she wouldn’t be financially independent anymore. And maybe that is a big enough benefit to offset all the costs like sleeping with men that she doesn’t really want to, risking disease or injury, etc. Now that she has stopped and is more financially dependent again, I think almost any mention of wanting her to do it more puts a lot of pressure on her, because the difference in wage is so great. If she were financially independent and then he made that suggestion, a lot of that pressure would be off.

    Then again, “mixed” could mean the exact opposite, but considering it’s coming from the other party who isn’t actually engaging in what is going on, and he is turned on by it, so obviously will go to great lengths to see it continue, suggests that maybe he doesn’t really know how it feels.

    If her having sex with other men turns PIMP on, why not just let her do it for free? If it is the paying for sex that turns him on, there’s gotta be some sort of role-play or fake scenario they could set up.

    And if in the end, it’s just because he wants to buy a house, he should probably help her find a higher paying job that she is more excited about.

  21. @ Mimie,
    maybe you would have caught HPV with condom change too… the virus could have rubbed off on his skin, and then on to your skin, sadly condoms don’t offer high protection against diseases passed by skin-to-skin contact (hpv, herpes, syphilis) simply because they don’t cover the whole area.

    Which is something NCA and his partners should consider, btw.

  22. “I have a problem with the answer to PIMP, since it seems to presume that escorting for women is the heterosexual male equivalent of swallowing cum from hundreds of men—meaning that escorting is like being abused. It’s a stupid analogy, and surprisingly puritanical for this column.”

    I believe he was comparing “sex with someone you’re not attracted to” to “sex with someone you’re not attracted to.”

  25. @ Da Lady

    You said:

    “you SHALL AND MUST change it, or chances are it will rip and/or leak. Should be taught in school…”

    And while I absolutely agree with you 100%, when I was in High School sex ed (we’re talking late eighties here, for context), we were told NOT to change condoms if we had sex with the same person more than once in, um, a row (or something).

    It always rang false, and seemed unwieldy. What we were told is that there was a danger of sperm remaining viable on the penis (not true) and that there was a chance one could get some on the outside of the new condom and it was “safer” to just keep reusing the same one over and over.

    For context, again, late 1980’s in a Long Island, New York High School. Scary, no?

  26. I don’t understand why people are getting hung up on the nuances of “mixed” feelings. That’s PIMP’s word, not his girlfriend’s. Who knows how accurate it is…

  27. Dan said a guy with two women who are wearing female condoms can go back and forth as he wishes, but I’m wondering: can female condoms be used more than once? Also, aren’t they less effective against STDs than male condoms?

  28. How I interpreted “mixed” was directly affected by how the girlfriend was doing it — she stopped the second she didn’t desperately need the money. I’m guessing “mixed” means that she liked the money, but wasn’t so sure about the job itself, and even so, didn’t like the work enough to give up the good pay.

    Everyone has hang-ups about their jobs, but most of us get over them because we need the money. That she promptly dropped the job is a huge clue that she hasn’t gotten over the “issues” (her words, apparently) of sex work.

    Don’t force it, PIMP. That said, you shouldn’t be doing everything for her if you can help it; is she doing everything to minimize her expenses now? Etc.

    If you want a house more than a waitress girlfriend, well, you know what to do then: move on.

  30. BTIMM – My advice, as a gay, male bottom is, learn to douche your behind. Guys who enjoy anal appreciate the extra effort put into making it a “clean” experience. Well, most do, anyway.

    My extra tidbit of advice, which I developed over the years is to add a drop of gel toothpaste on your anus, after you’ve cleaned down there. I’ve only experienced compliments from doing such. I’m sure your bottom-munching boyfriend will appreciate the mild, minty flavor, and it makes the whole experience more enjoyable for both him and you.

  31. Is PIMP even really this girls boyfriend? The way he describes their arrangement he makes it sound he’s one of her clients. Like a craigslist ad, need help paying your bills ladies, let me be your benefactor.

  32. i have a hunch pimp isn’t going to be a long term bf for the grad student. he assumes they are going to “make things more permanent” but….it strikes me as unlikely. just my intuition here. she’ gonna move on soon.

  33. @22

    “I believe he was comparing “sex with someone you’re not attracted to” to “sex with someone you’re not attracted to.””

    Well, you would simply be wrong.

    He was comparing “sex with someone you’re not attracted to” (escorting) to being forced to engage in a sex act that you find repulsive, nauseating, abhorrent, etc. (any heterosexual man would find swallowing cum repulsive). There is simply no indication in the letter that the escort is engaging in sex acts that are so absolutely repugnant to her.

    Dan might as well have compared escorting to an a situation where an unwilling victim is being shit on, pissed on or tortured. They aren’t the same, and there is absolutely no indication from the letter that the escort feels degraded in the way that is implied in Dan’s analogy.

    Dan’s analogy also implies that an escort has given up all control over her sexuality simply by the nature of the job. Rubbish. An escort can set rules and an escort can say “no”.

    I think many people, Dan included, are simply too willing to assume that escorting is essentially, and more than any other job, a deeply humiliating act.

  34. …and just to head off any confusion…

    I am not suggesting this woman should continue escorting if she has “issues” with it, or “mixed” feelings. I am suggesting that making blunt comparisons that are obviously intended to disgust the letter writer are simply way off base.

  35. I’m a huge fan of the female condom — because it feels better to the inserting partner (me).

    They are re-used in the third world where a re-used condom is better than no condom at all. Even at $3+ each, we can afford to replace them.

    The lower effectiveness is because it is easier to misuse them. Every time you enter the hole, you must be sure you’ve hit the mark and are inside the condom. If either partner likes complete withdrawal and re-entry, this is highly problematic. In these cases, it is best for the receiving partner to hold the outer ring in place with fingers to assure protected penetration.

  36. @33: I dunno. Have you ever had sex with someone for any reason other than your personal desire (i.e. in this situation, money)? It’s not fun. I haven’t done it for money, but having sex I wasn’t into at all I’d unhesitatingly term “gross” if not “weird and creepy” and yes, possibly “repugnant.”

    I think Dan’s analogy of PIMP servicing hundreds of strange men is analogous because in this situation, it MAY be humiliating or repugnant for PIMP’s girlfriend to continue escorting. She’s indicated serious reluctance (that is, enough to give up a hugely lucrative salary) with the work. She *could* be a satisfied, independent escort, but where are those indications? She got into the work in the first place because of credit card debt, and dropped it *ASAP* when the debt was gone.

    She’d rather be waitressing (which isn’t the best work either) for a paltry salary than doing sex work, which is a pretty strong statement on whether she liked her old job.

  37. @33: Oh, and that’s not to say if escorting is your thing, then you should stop doing it. (I wouldn’t do it, but I can understand if others do. No biggie.) But the situation here is that PIMP’s girlfriend is obviously reluctant and does view sex work as having “issues”, as she says.

  38. @ Raimy, what you say about HPV is correct, but it’s worth pointing out that HPV is an STD that doesn’t require sexual contact to transmit. I gave a girl an HPV infection in spite of the fact that she was my first everything: kiss, date, girlfriend, oral, sex, etc. I don’t think she was cheating, so unless you believe in spontaneous generation, I had to get it from somebody. Which means I got it without any sexual contact whatsoever.

    So remember: abstinence is not an effective means of preventing the spread of STDs!

  40. I think Dan’s advice to PIMP is pretty much on the mark (as always). For her own sake, the girlfiriend needs find a well paying job worthy of her education, and then the pair of them should investigate some serious cuckolding with guys that she finds attractive (it works for my wife and I). If payment needs to be involved, build that in and give the proceeds to a worthwhile charity.

  41. To all the folks who are waffling on PIMP, take the sex out of it and think of it in context.

    Let’s just say I have a choice between working for Acme Corporation making jet-powered roller skates and Amalgamated Widget making widgets. I’ve worked for Amalgamated Widget before, and I decided I didn’t want to work for them in the future. Even if they pay 10 times what Acme pays, I still don’t want to work for them.

    Now, with no sex involved, does my significant other have any call to say, no, you should go work for Amalgamated Widget because I like the idea of you working for Amalgamated Widget?

    Didn’t think so.

    It’s not his life, and it’s not his decision to make. It’s hers. If they’re in this together and money is an issue, he could help her find a better paying job, or he could help her find other ways to be financially independent.

  42. @33 how can you say “any heterosexual man would find swallowing cum repulsive?” have you polled all heterosexual men? my boyfriend has tried to have sex with men, and he’s not into it, but he eats his own cum all the time, and seems to enjoy it, so is he gay?

    i think all that dan is trying to say here is that there are lots of reasons why his girlfriend might not want to be a sex worker, and unless he’s tried it himself he can’t really understand where she’s coming from.

    @38 you definitely can get hpv from non-sexual contact (a toilet seat, for example), but how are you so sure that you’re the one who gave it to your partner? it’s almost impossible to trace where someone got something like hpv, unless you knowingly sleep with someone who has it.

    and finally, i’d like to direct you all (particularly BTIMM) to my friend’s movie: butthole lickin. some of you may have seen it at hump! last year.

  44. Clembot…
    Swallowing the cock and cum of a strange, unattractive man is repugnant, disgusting, traumatizing, etc. for a heterosexual woman, too. If the person doing so, male or female, can disconnect the reality of what’s happening, and see it more clinically as a job, well then- this person is a successful whore. Gender doesn’t dictate that ability.

    A typical man might supposedly find the idea of being paid to have sex with the opposite sex interesting, but 1) a typical woman doesn’t feel that way, 2)) there are gender power dynamics here you are not recognizing, 3) having sex with a man and a woman are different experiences (I would feel more comfortable, as a straight woman, being a lesbian escort than a straight one) 4) you would likely be servicing people you find unattractive, gross, creepy, and even threatening…. whatever gender that is, that’s a… repugnant experience.

    There are always people crawling out of the woodwork to pick apart some detail of what Dan said, while completely missing the spirit and truth of it.

  45. @38
    HPV is passed through genital contact. A person can have HPV even if years have passed since he or she had had sex, and most infected persons do not realize they are infected or that they are passing the virus to a sexual partner. She could have gotten HPV through a previous partner, and it didn’t show up until she was with you.

    http://www.cdc.gov/std/HPV/STDFact-HPV.h…

    http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/STDFact-HPV-a…

    Also, you cannot get HPV from being unclean or from toilet seats.

    http://www.cdc.gov/std/HPV/common-questi…

  46. When someone kisses me on the mouth after eating my ass – it tastes like strawberries. I’m not even playing. I’m just sayin’… I’m a clean teen.

  47. It seems odd to me that BTIMM is “afraid that telling him would offend him.” If she doesn’t like kissing her boyfriend after he eats her ass, I am assuming SHE never eats HIS ass. So don’t you think he has figured out by now that she’s not into analingus (except on the receiving end?) I don’t think telling him will offend him; I think he already knows.
    Also, why don’t you try to work on this hang-up a little, for the sake of mutual pleasure, by taking a shower together before sex? You can soap your little assholes up to your heart’s content, then relax and enjoy everything, including the kisses afterwards.
    One last comment about germs: my husband is a gastroenterologist (who happens to enjoy rimming me)and he would like to remind everyone that you ingest small amounts of fecal bacteria every day. It gets on your hands, on doorknobs, on money, in the food you prepare or consume in restaurants, etc. 99.999% of the time it doesn’t make you sick. Our bodies are well adapted to fight off most germs.

  48. what does “just as Paris was worth the hassle of a mass” mean?!? i’m very confused by that, and i hate feeling like i’m missing the joke.

  49. Eating ass puts you at greater risk for Hep C (especially), among other things. So, technically, does kissing someone right after you eat ass. Please, use some kind of barrier when you eat. Latex can be more pliable than plastic wrap; or cut open a condom.

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