Hi, I’m Francine Colman-Gutierrez. Here are some things you are wrong about, in honor of Independence Day. (No, not the movie. You’re wrong about that, too.)
Fireworks: Actually, they’re for people who wear sunglasses on the back of their head.
Fireworks: Actually, they’re for people who wear Under Armour in public.
Fireworks: They’re for people who drive Ford F-150 trucks but never carry anything in the back.
Fireworks: They’re for people named Brett, Kyle, or Tyler.
Fireworks: They’re for people who live vicariously through fantasy football.
Fireworks:For people who wear a Bluetooth—even while shooting off fireworks…