- “Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba”
Here, according to me, is everything that happens in Green Lantern:
Okay, so we start in space. A sort of rotten-apple-head guy encased in green Jell-O barfs fire on some space lizards and then they die. It turns out that this guy is a sort of flying octopus made of poo-dreads who is also on fire. Let’s call him Space-Voldemort. Now he is running around eating planets and shit. Not good!
Meanwhile, on earth: plane chase!!! It’s Ryan Reynolds (aka Marlon Bland-o) vs. Blake Lively (aka dean of students at Bland-eis University) vs. a couple of robot planes. Ryan Reynolds wins the plane chase because he doesn’t play by the rules and his only weakness is thinking about his dead dad. Remember that for laaaaaater!!!
