MONDAY, MARCH 6
In dark days such as these, only one man can save us: Ryan Gosling! Or, y’know… a chubby German Ryan Gosling impersonator. “The Goldene Kamera awards, one of Germany’s most prestigious award galas, thought they had the Oscar-nominated star on hand to accept the prize for best international film on behalf of La La Land,” gabs the Hollywood Reporter. “Instead, they gave the prize to Ludwig Lehner, a Ryan Gosling double.” (Okay, let’s be honest: It would be more accurate to note that dear, sweet Ludwig is maybe a “Ryan Gosling double” after six or seven martinis and a funhouse mirror, and actually, let’s make that eight martinis.) “Good evening, I am Ryan Gosling,” Lehner, who is not Ryan Gosling, told the applauding crowd, which included Nicole Kidman and Colin Farrell. “I dedicate this prize to Joko and Klaas,” he added in his thick German accent, referencing the comedians who arranged the prank. And ta-da! Just like that, a “joke” from “German comedians” was more entertaining than anything in La La Land, the boringest movie that has ever bored anyone to death (of boredom). IN RELATED NEWS… Psst! Real Ryan Gosling! You are hereby invited to accept an “award” at our house, anytime. (Okay, let’s be honest: Ludwig is invited too, so long as we’ve had at least eight martinis and can keep the lights off.)