- The tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth.
Rereading it today, this Chuck Klosterman essay (about some stupid book called Encyclopedia of Guilty Pleasures: 1,001 Things You Hate to Love) has a little less bite than it did when it blew my 22-year-old mind up with truth in 2004, but I still think about it all the time. Because people still pull this shit all the time! Think about your words, people! I AM NOT INTERESTED IN FEELING GUILTY ABOUT MY PLEASURES.
Ostensibly a reference guide for those who want to feel embarrassed about being engaged with life, The EGP is a compilation of everything that’s been popular over the past fifty years, augmented by short essays about why we can’t help but adore these terrible, terrible things. These are things like Michael Jackson’s Thriller, an album that 1) was produced by Quincy Jones, 2) features guitar playing by Eddie Van Halen, 3) includes at least three singles that are undeniably awesome, and 4) has the single-best bass line from the entire 1980s (the opening of “Billie Jean”). It is a guilty pleasure, presumably, because forty-five million people liked it, and because Jackson is quite possibly a pedophile, and because two dancers had a really unfair knife fight* in the “Beat It” video. This is akin to considering Thomas Jefferson a guilty pleasure because he briefly owned two pet bears. I mean, he still wrote the fucking Declaration of Independence, you know?
And then:
And why are gumball machines indicted on page 114? It’s not just that I don’t harbor guilty feelings about gumball machines; I have no opinion at all about gumball machines (unless I want a gumball; then I’m briefly “pro—gumball machine,” I suppose).
And then:
What the authors of The Encyclopedia of Guilty Pleasures (and everyone else who uses this term) fail to realize is that the only people who believe in some kind of universal taste—a consensual demarcation between what’s artistically good and what’s artistically bad—are insecure, uncreative elitists who need to use somebody else’s art to validate their own limited worldview. It never matters what you like; what matters is why you like it.
You can read the whole thing here. Apologies for posting a just-okay six-year-old essay; my Degrassi post from yesterday got me thinking about it. Now imagine the smallest thing you can imagine, then make it way smaller. That is still like TWO ENTIRE JOHN GOODMANS compared to the amount of guilt i have about watching and liking Degrassi: The Next Generation (or any iteration of Degrassi). Stop feeling pretending to feel so guilty all the time, y’all. Just like what you like. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must get back to writing this glowing review of The Tooth Fairy and I am not joking and sorry if you can’t handle the tooth. Goodbye.
Ricky Martin is a guilty pleasure.
Most other things I can freely admit to loving.
Thanks, Lindy! I’m cured!
@2: Hope you don’t think I was being accusatory! I just don’t want anyone to hide their Degrassi love light under a bushel.
Chuck Klosterman isn’t a guilty pleasure. He’s an irritating douchebag.
Sometimes a situation calls for “Toxic” by B. Spears and I don’t feel ashamed to admit that.
I always thought a guilty pleasure was something you enjoyed yet most people you assosiate with poo-pooed it. Like the way that baseball is a guilty pleasure for me among friends who hate pro sports, or Lady Gaga is a guilty pleasure when I am among most of my friends, or admitting infront of my high schoold drama teacher that I liked Threes Company (OK, that show hasn’t aged well the last 20 years, everyone was guilty of what Ms. Grosso would call over-acting). I always took the “guilty” in guilty pleasure to be a little tongue in cheek, more of an admission that you are going to get teased a little when the subject comes up, or teased a-lot when everyone finds out.
That is why most people don’t talk about their masturbation practices.
I am delighted to hear you will have happy news for me about the Tooth. Duane Johnson’s eyebrow-cocking skills make him a treasure to me.
I’m 48 and I love watching Degrassi! Now I can do it without embarassment. Thanks Lindy.
I thought that a guilty pleasure was something that you loved but was bad for you. I mostly use the expression when it comes to food. Like, chocolate truffles are my guilty pleasure. They are awesome and delicious, but they are making my butt huger.
i’m not interested in feeling guilty about my pleasures, but with the ones that my intellect knows are bad quality yet i still enjoy for some reason…well, those are the guilty ones.
is watching re-runs of my so-called life on hulu a guilty pleasure?
Duke Leto: “the tooth….the tooth.”
The term is so over-used as to be meaningless. Guilty pleasures used to mean an illicit affair, watching TV or eating potato chips in bed just doesn’t measure up.
I really like the movie Doom.
Falco.
You are my guilty pleasure, Lindy, but I don’t feel guilty in the slightest. Also, I have Nsync and Britney on my ipod.
I don’t have guilt about my pleasures, but I am certainly embarrassed by some of them.
Guilt sometimes makes things more pleasurable.
Also, I’m an old man with a big beard, if I don’t claim some guilt watching DeGrassi it looks twisted as fuck. “Guilty pleasure” can be code for “I know this looks wrong, but I have my reasons that have nothing to do with the creepy shit you may be imagining.”
@16, you nailed it, its not really guilt, just embarrasment. Because in Seattle, and other major metropolises with thriving art, theater, and music scenes hipster points are valuable, even if you are not a hipster. Its subliminal for those of you who might be quick to disagree. Think about it, think about your own thought processes.
But, most important, it is about context. Watching porn is a guilty pleasure when the subject comes up with certain people, other people it is a shared interest.
I have a Mandy Moore song on my iPod. It is the epitome of a guilty pleasure, and when it came on during a Pocker night with the guys, I was absolutely horrified.