- everythingidoiswrong.org
Apparently, milk has been found to reduce P.M.S.—you know, where ladies get all bitchy once a month before the blood gushes out.
As a lady to whom this happens (monthly!), I’d be interested in knowing more about, say, the science behind this, and whether I’m supposed to take my milk intravenously or just put it up there. But instead the “Got milk?” people have an ad campaign targeting men*—one that’s all about how bitchy the ladies get, and how maybe if you lob half-gallon containers of milk at them while cowering, they won’t be bitchy so much.
- everythingidoiswrong.org
The “Got milk?” people (the California Milk Processor Board) have a website called “Everything I Do Is Wrong” (subtitle: “Are You A Man Living With P.M.S.?”)** that’s littered with hilarious charts and graphs and etc. about ladies’ That Time of the Month bitchiness and about specifically how the poor guys doing all the wrong stuff should buy milk and throw it into the room where the bitch is and cower.
The Boston Globe talked to a guy named Steve, who explained how it’s not offensive, it’s funny, LADIEEEEZZZ!
The board’s executive director says the Internet, radio and billboard campaign isn’t meant to be offensive but to encourage open conversations between men and women about an awkward subject.
“None of the humor is aimed at women. The humor is aimed at how clueless men are in dealing with emotional situations.” Steve James said Tuesday. “All of the humor is built around men’s cluelessness.”
Steve also said hey, his wife laughed at some of the stuff on the website, so it’s cool.
- everythingidoiswrong.org
Turns out the California Milk Processor Board is basing the campaign on research that received money from GlaxoSmithKline—they manufacture calcium supplements—and that the “author also served as a consultant to and had financial ties with the drug maker,” per the Globe. The chairlady of the University of California, Davis Department of Nutrition says she’s not familiar with such research, but then what do ladies know, amirite, ladies?! She probably had P.M.S. when it came out and couldn’t read because she was busy being a bitch.
Thanks, Steve. You have amply demonstrated men’s cluelessness, indeed. Also, you have made me want to kill things and throw people. And it’s not even That Time of the Month!
*Or it’s a stealth campaign actually targeting ca-ray-zeee lady bloggers? Because that’s going to work.
**Which crashed my browser in the middle of writing this post. Thanks again, Steve!
All advertising everywhere is humor built around men’s cluelessness.
@1 Calling this anything approaching humor is a stretch.
Almost makes me long for the good ole days when they liked to tell us that PMS was psychosomatic.
@1,2: Yes, I think the King of Queens was built around this premise and was decidedly not funny.
Shocking that an industry built on using rape racks, insemination guns, and milk extraction machines is insensitive to women.
@2, humor is not the same thing as good humor.
The ad agency that designed this campaign is happy with people being offended.
http://theweek.com/article/index/217177/…
How ironic that the artificial hormones used to produce milk may be causing more PMS problems for women. Of course, we don’t know for certain because the research on women’s PMS conditions is still sorely lacking.
@5: “milk extraction machines”
Oh no! Next thing you know HUMAN FEMALES will use milk extraction machines!
Future scene at Starbucks:
Make me a dry cappuccino, lots of foam and a tampon for dipping, pronto!
#9: Yeah, breast pumps are the same thing because choice, freedom, and pain are inconsequential, right?
HA HA HA, WOMEN. AM I RIGHT, GUYS?
Well, I think it’s funny.
And the link in the post to everythingidoiswrong.org is broken, but I’m sure it’s not your fault, Bethany.
Someone needs to tell Steve that PMS isn’t a laughing matter. At least when there are ladies around.
Ooh, take a dose of bovine growth hormone with some pesticides and an antibiotic cocktail to cure your PMS! Reminds me of when Nestle tried to convince women that their breast milk was bad for babies in an effort to sell powdered milk with the nutritional value of sawdust. I hope no one is stupid enough to fall for this garbage.
But of course PMS is funny–just like blackface is.
of course teh dudes also suffer from being all emotional and irrational…
but it is about for, like 4 weeks out of the month w/ them, and no amount of milk is gonna fix that …unless it is the warm milk and homebaked cookies that mom the saint of the world made… and that only works because you’re remembering what it was like when you are eight…
So, do they drink it or pour it on their vaginas?
Q. How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. THAT’S NOT FUNNY
That makes me want to stop drinking milk.
What’s that you say? A first world white woman whined about something utterly inconsequential on a blog? WEIRD
What’s that you say? that half of a species fails to understand basic biology while castigating the other half as evil harpies? WEIRD
@22 – you’re right. Women should stop doing that.
This is despicable and insulting. PMS is torture, it’s painful, it brings on horrible headaches and distorted vision, and made me feel ill for about 2 weeks per month for much of my life. When I was in junior high, in about 1908, my doctor told me to put up with it or have a baby. . .
It’s not funny. And the idea of drinking milk when one is feeling so ill is ridiculous.
It is just not productive or respectful to make fun of women who feel ill.
@23: when, in your experience were men cast as harpies?
perhaps jerks or douchebags or assholes, but harpies or many of the other gender loaded terms, ehh… probably not so much.
It’s not milk so much as it is calcium:
Calcium. Many PMS symptoms resemble those of calcium deficiency, says Susan Thys-Jacobs, an endocrinologist at St. Lukes Roosevelt Hospital in New York City. Though no one fully understands what causes PMS, Thys-Jacobs hypothesizes that for many women the problem may signal an underlying calcium shortage.
In a study of 466 PMS sufferers, published in the August 1998 issue of the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology, Thys-Jacobs and her colleagues found that calcium supplements of 1,200 milligrams per day — the calcium equivalent of four glasses of milk — significantly eased PMS symptoms.
Calcium was no instant cure; the results only kicked in after about two months of use. But by the third month of treatment, women taking the supplements had only about half the PMS symptoms of those who took a placebo. The only symptoms calcium didn’t curb, says Thys-Jacobs, were fatigue and insomnia.(Web MD)
I have 2 teenage daughters, and PMS is rampant in my household while the older girl is home from college. None of us like milk, because really think about it: what other mammal drinks milk past infancy? The whole concept is just odd, I bet it originated in Wisconsin. So, calcium supplements and other foods that are high in calcium are on the menu, and life is much smoother throughout the month.
Oh, and all men are idiots. Not what I believe personally, but turn on the television to any channel, and you will find depiction after depiction of men as witless morons.
@24, some doctors will tell you that teenage girls don’t have PMS, can’t have it. My mother in law, a nurse practitioner, went toe to toe at a gynecological conference with a Dr spouting that nonsense. At that time my sister in law was 15, and suffered PMS at least 2 weeks out of four. I love my sister in law, but she was seriously the antichrist at least half the time. That’s when she hit on the calcium connection, we swear by it. But you don’t have to drink milk to boost calcium.
My sister in law opted to smoke a whole lot of pot, made her much happier, and still does, but does fuck all for PMS.
@6:
True, but only because good humor has a much higher milk content….
You’re right, that’s not at all funny. It was insensitive of me to laugh about it. I know I can’t possibly make it right, because the insensitivity I’ve displayed is unforgivable, but is there anything I can do to make you hate me just a little less, at least momentarily?
I’m not going to debate whether it was funny or not, or even true-to-life (because I think it’s sort of dumb); but the comments have me wondering something – it was horrible and sexist to pretend that PMS didn’t exist, and it’s now horrible and sexist to acknowledge the PMS exists.
I live with a woman who has some degree PMS, and it’s definitely no fun for her, but as the guy living with her (and therefore forced onto the hormonal/emotional roller coaster every month), it’s no fun either of us.
If we can acknowledge that PMS exists and that it sucks for the sufferer, can we acknowledge that it sucks for the partners, too? I mean, without being default sexist and horrible.
oh for fuck’s sake.
Lactose intolerance is a hate crime.
This is misogynistic, but what’s new? I don’t get PMS, at least not the stereotypically angry, irrational kind. I’ve been with the same guy for 5 years and he’s often remarked that he can’t tell by my behaviour what “time of the month” it is, which differs from his experiences with previous girlfriends.
On an unrelated note, yeah, the dairy industry just makes stuff up. Their biggest lie is that cow milk is good for humans. Gross.
@26 What other mammal takes calcium supplements? The whole concept is odd.
High estrogen levels detected. Abandon thread.
@all – oh, so are we pretending PMS doesn’t exist now, or was made up by men, or that women with PMS can (heavy italics) be irrational bitches, or that the calcium in milk doesn’t help to alleviate symptoms, and that milk, steamed, in a latte, or cold, with a warm chocolate chip cookie, isn’t delicious? Is that what we’re pretending to do?
Aces. By the by, soy milk is soy juice. There are no tits on a soybean. And that shit is disgusting.
@17 Wow, so you’re decrying over-generalizations and ignorance while displaying it yourself. Good job.
@30 You know, the problem with acknowledging that it sucks for the sufferer’s partner is the implicit assumption that PMS automatically makes women awful shrieking harpies. That’s why it’s sexist and horrible.
I’ve been lucky enough to have very light periods, with almost zero symptoms of PMS. I get through both PMS and my period without being a bitch to anyone else, as do most women I know with more severe symptoms.
So when I’m in a bad mood and not menstruating, it really pisses me off to be told to “Go take a Midol” rather than being listened to. Seems PMS is used as an easy crutch to dismiss women as irrational, erratic, and over-emotional, even though sometimes most men I know could do with “taking a Midol,” too.
@38 – my thoughts exactly. It’s so great to be deduced to a child every time you get upset about something because of your biology… whether the symptoms affect you or not.
“#9: Yeah, breast pumps are the same thing because choice, freedom, and pain are inconsequential, right?”
No, but humans use milking machines too, so your HORROR and OUTRAGE at the machinery is misplaced. If you want to focus on other elements such as the conditions they’re kept in, that’s fine. But there’s nothing unnatural about those aids.
I think enough milk would definitely cure PMS, if it were used to drown the dumb assholes who actually okayed this ad campaign.
And I agree with others – the offensiveness comes from making assumptions about individuals. I’ve never had PMS in my life, although I sureashell have been around a lot of men who seem to have PMS 365 fucking days of the year…
As a man (insert insult here) who has a partner with massive PMS, I can tell you why men might joke about it. To cope.
Also, to the dope who thinks it’s a crime to milk cows: They love it. It doesn’t hurt unless you are late in milking them. The same way a breast-feeding mother feels when the baby empties the mams.
the ads aren’t particularly funny or clever but any person actually offended by this is a stupid fucking cunt. you can’t take a little joke about something that happens to 50% of the world population? get over yourselves you touchy wimps
@43: You sound like a perfectly well-adjusted man who loves women greatly.
@38 Yep. I agree. It’s wrong and stupid that PMS is used like a sledgehammer to dismiss women’s opinions, which happens in a more public/general sense. And actual PMS sucks for the sufferer, and also for the proximal partner of the suffer, but that’s more of a private/specific thing.
@42 That’s a part of it. It’s tough to watch someone you love suffering, it’s also tough to be the object of what can be like emotionally sort of abusive aspects of that suffering, and it’s tough because you can’t ever mention those three letters (N.B. it’s not a matter of either/or – both parties/genders going through the syndrome get the short end).
@44 anyone who can’t abide casual usage of the word “cunt” is a cunt. Notice that I said “persons” because many of the offended people in these comments are men
And anyone who really considers this ad campaign “misogynistic” has the thinnest skin on the planet. Why don’t you crusaders go after the awful anorexia porn in the American Apparel ads that appear on the back of every single fucking Stranger instead of this non-controversy? oh that’s right because you’re hypocrite fanboys who don’t mind that the Stranger gets an exorbitant amount of money from a company LITERALLY RUN BY A RAPIST
@46: None of this false appeal to hypocrisy makes you any less damaged of an individual.
And men have every right to be offended by depicting them as mewling crybaby idiots.
When I stopped drinking coffee my PMS vanished completely. I highly recommend it. (Of course, I was also, in effect, ceasing to drink milk too, since the only place I ever got it was in a latte. It seems completely absurd that drinking milk, a substance adults were never meant to consume, would do anything to benefit your reproductive system. In fact, at least one study indicated that lactose (milk sugar) screws up your ovaries and CAUSES reproductive problems.)
You people have no real problems. So you make shit like this something more than nothing.