I am totally over plates, all flat and played out. Aren’t you guys?
Seriously. Bowls are so much better. They are curvy and keep all my
food in one place, in a lump or pool. I like to hold a bowl in my hand.
I like foods that come in bowls, such as noodles. And soups. And noodle
soups.
At Than Brothers Pho (516 Broadway E, 568-7218; and
five other Seattle locations, see www.thanbrothers.com) pretty much
everything comes in bowls (yesss!). I’ve been eating at Than Brothers
since I was in high school, so I fuckin’ dared the reader reviews to
tell me something I didn’t know about Seattle’s creampuff palace.
Prolific Restaurant Guide reviewer Fnarf starts out with a no-brainer:
“They have pho here. If you don’t want pho, don’t come here, but if you
want pho, COME HERE.” Check! Knew that! Than Brothers Pho definitely
has pho.
I went to the Than Brothers on Aurora (7714 Aurora Ave N, 527-5973)
because Fnarf describes it as “better, if a little seedier.” Right
again. I love the Aurora Than Brothers, and I love Aurora. If you’re
going to eat cheap food, the venue should be at least a little bit
crappy. It just makes sense. (I’m already bummed out about the day when
Aurora gets “revitalized.”)
The disgruntled Zymyrgy, whose review is elegantly titled, “Meh.
Weak, weak brothsauce,” accuses Than Brothers of hating him: “The
proprietors seem to have secure locks at the sides of their jaws
keeping them from smiling or uttering more than a monosyllabic grunt.”
To test out this theory, I smiled at the lady serving me. She smiled
back. I asked how large the extra-large pho bowl is. She said, “It’s
pretty big. You want to see?” and held one up (it’s fucking huge).
The soup (small veggie, $4.35) was obviously awesome. As I usually
do, I threw some Sriracha into my brothsauce. Then, remembering Fnarf’s
assertion that “the Sriracha sauce can creep up on you,” I threw in
some more. Bring it, Fnarf. Then, minutes later—oh snap! The
Sriracha, keepin’ it on the low, had totally crept up on me! I have
officially been schooled by Fnarf. Goddamnit. We bought extra
creampuffs to go ($1.50 for three).
Nana’s Soup House (3418 NE 55th St, 523-9053) is
entirely darling, and entirely devoted to soup. At this particular
lunch hour, a dapper man played tinkly medleys on the piano. The girl
at the counter said she liked my glasses. Stranger reader
reviewer Shroom Lover, who is clearly high, recommends the wild
mushroom soup ($3.50 for a cup), which I ordered. It is a life-changing
soup: creamy, tangy, intense. My friend got the vegan chili (WHY?),
also for $3.50, and pronounced it “boring” (duh, because it obviously
needs cheese and animal bits). She also let me have some of her corn
muffin, which is basically baked candy—in the best way. There’s
only one dissenter among the reader reviews, a man named Tim
K., who accuses Nana’s of being “fairly pricey for what you
get.” He is wrong.
Things are just super weird over at In the Bowl (1554 E Olive Way, 568-2343). My dining companion, who used to live
across the street, warned me up front that she is not a fan (I believe
her exact words were, “That place is kind of gnar-gnar,” which is, of
course, short for gnarly). I don’t know if I’d go quite that
far—”gnar-gnar” is pretty harsh—but I wasn’t thrilled.
The reader reviews tell a different story. First of all, Kinkos
declares it the “BEST PLACE EVER.” Sorry, guy. Places I like better
than In the Bowl: my bed, California, the forest, Szechuan Noodle Bowl
(420 Eighth Ave S, 623-4198). Next! Kinkos suggests, “Develop your own
noodle-bowl fetish by trying it out.” Um, noodles are not sexy. This is
the last thing I want. “Hella spicy,” writes Fluteprof. Yes. That one
is true.
As per nearly everyone’s suggestion, we ordered the Melting Cultures
appetizer ($6.95). It was, as promised, both weird and good: a bowl of
lumpy brown peanutty goop with a coconut-milk floater, served with
tasty grilled-bread wedges. It is also “hella spicy.” Not to be
out-spiced again, I carefully ordered my entrée (see-through
noodle, $7.75, with fried tofu, “homemade soy and mushroom sauce,”
cabbage, green onion, and pineapple) at a sensible spice level of two.
But again, hella spicy! Aside from that, I didn’t taste much.
My friend said not a word about her curry.
I can get behind the appeal of In the Bowl. The place is cute,
convenient, and cheap. They deliver. They’re obviously trying their
very, very best, and that’s worth a lot. (But I still don’t want to
have sex with a noodle, Kinkos.)
