Descripti n: A low-key Chinese eatery and bar in Lake
City.

Back lounge decor: Old-timey celebrity photos affixed
directly to the wood walls via staples, tape, and tacks, perpetuating a
charming rec-room effect.

Seven seas trivia: In ancient times—when bullshitters
roamed unabated—the “seven seas” referred to specific bodies of
water that were said to contain ruby-infested islands and towering sea
serpents.

Items commonly mistaken for modern-day sea serpents: Gnarled
masses of seaweed, oarfish (creepy eel-like creatures that can grow to
30 feet in length!), globsters (huge, alienlike blobs of decomposing
whale meat—for real).

Happy hours: Daily 11 am–6 pm.

Happy-hour drink specials: 50 cents off well drinks.

Happy-hour food specials: None, but the menu is stocked with
such budget-friendly appetizers as $2.75 spring rolls and $3.50 onion
pancakes. recommended

Marti Jonjak—The Stranger’s fashion columnist—has a technical degree in apparel design and works in the garment industry. Her treasured casual-wear aesthetic is both glamorous and trashy, suggesting...