Description: A no-frills neighborhood joint adjacent to the
Maple Leaf reservoir.

Decor: Faux wood siding, an unsettlingly huge wide-screen TV,
throngs of pull-tab dispensers, various bar games (shuffleboard, darts,
pool, pinball), boozy senior citizens.

Lunch specials: $5.25 burger with fries (daily 1–3
pm).

Fun food fact: A burger with fries is the most requested last
meal for execution-bound prisoners.

A less-savory last meal, requested by Robert Buell in 2002: A
single unpitted black olive.

Happy hours: Mon–Fri 4–6 pm.

Happy-hour drink specials: $2.25 domestic pints (Budweiser,
MGD), $3.50 nondomestic pints (Mac & Jack’s, Fat Tire), $2.50 well
drinks.

Marti Jonjak—The Stranger’s fashion columnist—has a technical degree in apparel design and works in the garment industry. Her treasured casual-wear aesthetic is both glamorous and trashy, suggesting...