It’s difficult to remember, but once upon a time, there was a long stretch of history when humanity went days, weeks, even lifetimes without hearing the words “Lady Gaga.” It was nice. People read books and invented cotton gins. Baby talk was left to babies, and human consciousness was uncluttered with narcotically addictive retardo-hooks suggesting Teutonic chants shouted from a K-hole in Ibiza circa 1988. This time is gone, decimated by the hard work, good timing, and brilliant luck of a musical talent determined to carpe the shit out of her diems and succeeding beyond her wildest dreams.
The rise of Lady Gaga is a historical event I will never forget having witnessed. I say this as someone who lived through both the Apollo 11 moon landing and Madonna’s wedding-dress-soiling performance of “Like a Virgin” at the 1984 Video Music Awards, two events that resonate richly with the rise of Gaga. Like Madonna, Lady Gaga is exploding the boundaries of what a female artist can accomplish in the world of pop. Like the moon landing, grumpy nut jobs swear it’s all just an elaborate hoax.
As with many non-diva-worshipping, non-dance-pop-obsessed music fans who nevertheless became interested in Lady Gaga, my interest came in two stages: noticing that Lady Gaga exists, and caring that Lady Gaga exists. Noticing came in the fall of 2008, with an onslaught of Slog banner ads promoting her upcoming performance at the Last Supper Club, which coincided with KUBE 93’s carpet-bomb rotation of her debut hit, “Just Dance.” The Last Supper Club show was a notorious disaster, with Gaga arriving late from her gig as opening act for the reunited New Kids on the Block at the Tacoma Dome and getting through just three songs before collapsing onstage amid rumors of excessive coke-iness. “Just Dance,” however, proved beyond durable, staying in high rotation for half a year and ushering in a series of gigantaur follow-up hits. Any fledgling disco dolly would give a boob for a hit the size of “Just Dance” or “Poker Face” or “LoveGame” or “Paparazzi”; Lady Gaga cowrote and released all four, one after another, with the last of the group finally causing me to care.
I first met “Paparazzi” through its video, a seven-minute, Jonas Åkerlund–directed melodrama featuring Italian subtitles and an unlucky Gaga taking a near-fatal plunge off a second-story balcony. The scene of her post-hospital return made me officially love her: Upon being wheeled into her villa, grimacing in high-fashion makeup and neck brace, Gaga stands to lurch garishly forward on a pair of bejeweled forearm crutches. It’s hideous—Madonna’s haute couture spiked with Morrissey’s “November Spawned a Monster”—and coming from a radio-ready pop star, it’s daring as fuck.
Then there’s the song, a prime slab of state-of-the-art Gaga pop that hits the ground running and crams enough hooks for five hits into its lithe three and a half minutes, even simulating lyrical depth by drawing an explicit connection between the drive to please Daddy and the hunger for fame. Like all of Gaga’s strongest songs—”Just Dance,” “LoveGame,” “Paper Gangsta,” the epic “Bad Romance”—”Paparazzi” seems to be composed of nothing but hooks: some melodic, some rhythmic, all freakishly effective at hijacking human brains. A clue to what’s behind Gaga’s facility with bionic earworms comes from her recent Rolling Stone interview, which reveals that Gaga’s synth-pop was largely inspired by concerns of the marketplace: After her Tori Amos–y piano balladry went nowhere, she replaced her singer-songwriter soul with a disco ball and got to work with a drum machine, ready and willing to make whatever music would speed her fastest toward fame.
In contrast to her outlandish visuals, Lady Gaga’s music is deeply conventional, but ingeniously so, marrying hooky verses to hooky bridges to hooky choruses (which are often split into two increasingly hooky parts), with one-off bonus hooks thrown in here and there for kicks, all of it produced with a consistency that’s positively ABBA-esque. Just as Stephin Merritt (himself a die-hard ABBA fan) has made a career out of studious distillations of the Great American Songbook, Gaga’s doing the same with dance pop, identifying the genre’s most effective intoxicants and boiling them down into unprecedentedly effective pop crack.
Blessed with the power to craft of-the-moment pop, young Stefani Germanotta could’ve kept her old nose and fleshy guidette figure and stayed behind the scenes à la Linda Perry, supplying megahits to pop stars who can’t do for themselves and getting richer than God. But that wasn’t enough for Lady Gaga, the Warhol-inspired persona Germanotta created to carry her songs to the world and secure her rightful portion of “The Fame.” Even more than her gold-plated hits, Lady Gaga’s extravagant, exhausting persona has become her best-known creation, with each week bringing another Gaga-shaped tornado of Halloween fashion, shameless product placement, and impassioned pro-gay proselytizing.
As anyone with an internet connection can attest, Lady Gaga’s been wrestling with near-fatal levels of overexposure for at least a year, but somehow she’s always come out on top, and watching the fight remains way more fun than not. Case in point #1: Gaga’s week of hell-raising this summer in New York City, during which she wore a studded bra to a Mets game, flipped off photographers for paying attention to her instead of the game, and pissed off a stodgy Jerry Seinfeld just by existing. “Of course I got drunk at Yankee Stadium,” Gaga told Vanity Fair, making it clear that, despite the continual costume changes and ceaseless touring, she’s taking time to enjoy the shit out of her once-in-a-lifetime position. Case in point #2: the recent viral video of Gaga denouncing Arizona’s immigration law from a Phoenix stage she refused to boycott because “we have to be active, we have to activate protests,” as she puts it in her fiery minute-long sermon, throughout which she emphasizes her political points by gesturing with a hand clad in an enormous papier-mâché claw. Vive la Gaga!
Much is made of Gaga’s extensive plundering of Madonna, but not enough is made of the speed and intensity with which this plundering has occurred. It took Madonna six years to get from dance-floor diva to international hit-maker to high-art pop icon; it took Gaga four singles, all culled from her debut album. Much like Bo Diddley sped up the blues to make rock ‘n’ roll, Stefani Germanotta sped up the pop machine that made Madonna to make Lady Gaga. And unlike anyone who’s come before or since, she’s harnessing this riotous cultural moment—of contemporaneous online living, copyright anarchy, and insta-viral everything—to her complete advantage, repeatedly snagging our fractured attention spans with shameless aesthetic piracy that feels, as it glosses over our oversaturated minds, like art. 
Now, if only she could make music as controversial or interesting as her outfits, we’d be in great shape.
Let’s hope her demise is as quick as her fame
RA RA OH MA MA VIVA THE GAGA!
the question still on most of our minds is, of course, precisely how much all of this has to do with kabbalah.
Everyone be nice at the T-Dome on Saturday. No Trampling. You forgot to mention her penis.
I have to give David Schmader props for having the balls to write the truth about Lady Gaga. Sorry you smarmy HATERS… you are OLD and bitter.
I know people that hate the Beatles too…
Jeeze, leave it to us pretentious, non-dancing, wall-flower infested, Seattlites to say so many negative things about GaGa…
Get a life you vapid hipsters, a bit of quality techno-pop might actually make you smile.
Aaaaand the winner is #8! Took exactly 8 posts for someone to lump all Seattleites together. Innovative, sir, innovative.
(Bonus point: you included the word “vapid,” thus (almost) making your post into a self-fullfilling prophecy)
She…is actually probably dying, you guys. Let’s try and be nice.
You are not Lindy West. Stop trying to write like her.
12: Learn yer history.
I’ve never heard any of her songs. In fact, I’m not even sure what she looks like. Seriously. This is how little I care for modern pop-culture.
I’m going to savor every last drop of her before she sets herself on fire with rocket-powered hot pants. Because we all know that’s inevitable.
And has anyone ever noticed that we never hear about who she’s fucking, who she’s bashing or trashing? She’s smart and surprisingly discreet. And she’s too busy doing things that actually excite HER. Writing music (be it brilliant or not), commissioning shoes made of car parts, giving a damn, and just having a solid good time. And THAT’S why we love her.
She is undoubtedly a talented musician.
It’s just a shame that she is using that talent to create music that is so simple and repetitive that I can’t give a damn about it.
I love the Gaga. I was around for Madonna’s first run, and the woman has never been able to sing. Gaga CAN sing, and she writes better songs (yeah, light dancey pop, but there’s nothing wrong with that – not everyone is into prog or high opera).
The only thing that Madonna seems to have won at (other than longevity) is the way her look affected fashions for teenagers for years. Gaga’s creations are much more arty and haute couture, but Madonna did help define streetwear for much of the 80s.
@14, if you really didn’t care about pop culture, you wouldn’t be commenting on an article about Lady Gaga.
@18 FTW!
I was hating on Lady Gaga before she was cool.
I’ve come around to Lady Gaga, but this article summarizes her perfectly.
Has she ever worn pants?
it is because i have been entrenched in electronic music, for the better part of two decades that i am in-different to Lady Gaga. She is feeding into the cliche and she isn’t all that original or cutting edge, she is merely mimicking the persona’s of several artists from the post puck wave of the early eighties, try Danielle Dax on for size, as an example. The truly sad part is, that there those that can’t tell the difference between innovation and branding! And clearly Lady Gaga is later and not the former!!
Even if I didn’t dislike her music, it’s stupid that everyone thinks her bold/eccentric ‘fashion’ choices are amazing, when Bjork has been doing the same sort of stuff for a decade and mostly getting shit for it.
All you folks who belong to the Grumpy And Gray Against Gaga Association (GAGAGA) sound like folks back in the day saying that rock and roll and later, disco, performers were talentless, or destructive. It was irrelevant then and it’s irrelevant now.
You have to face facts folks, she can play the hell out of a piano, actually writes her own music and has a much better trained voice than Madonna ever had. She is also politically active, something many celebrities avoid entirely or until they’re much older and have their cash in hand.
Saying she is derivative is beside the point. We live in post-modern times, everything is deriviative, everything relates.
#26, saying she is a derivative is the essential point. It isn’t being, about ‘being back in the day’, it is about fostering a culture that was experimenting, collaborating in and accessible and tangible way! We the jaded, got to taste this and cheer it on, we need new and interesting sounds in new and interesting ways. Lady Gaga is not that, she may not even care to be, she may even be talented. But clearly she spends more time and energy on her image and legacy than she does her product. She is like a prolific writer that has nothing to say!!
oh, as an aside, let’s remind everyone that she is trying to bill herself as on par as Madonna, etc, not just in our present time, but on par, in the box, if you will, with the derivative itself!! Madonna was bad enough in all actuality, and in reality Lady Gaga is closer to Cher! Lord help us all!!
Mr. Schmader is not always right, but he usually is, expecially on the taxonomy of pop trash, and he’s right on target here.
@24, you’re missing the point; chopping up Danielle Dax (oh dear) (and Bjork, and Madonna, and Cher, and Abba, and a hundred pseudo-techno Eurovision acts) into a million pieces, coating it with gallons of liquid sugar, and taking it to Number One IS the art form on display here. Nobody gives a shit about her piano playing; the world is full of dreary piano-playing saddoes. Gaga is a POP STAR, and her job is made much more difficult by the fact that “it’s all been done before”, and POP doesn’t really have anywhere to go. She found somewhere to go. I say well done, good fun.
it matters when she sells herself as the 2nd coming of all those artists listed, Cher and Abba should be on the list, BTY! And when your rise in pop culture is predicated on the masses buying into that illusion.
that should have been “Cher and Abba shouldn’t be on that list, BTW!!”
GaGag is almost as talented as NICKELBACK!!
Sorry but I don’t buy into this gaga love. She’s just another also-ran of Madonna and britney spears. In five years, she will be coked out trailer trash and you all will look like sorry old fag-hags worshipping at the temple of pop trailer trash.
I’m still coming down from her show last night, and people kept telling me throughout the week to read this piece, so this morning I did. You nailed it perfectly David! I didn’t care at all about her, and then *poof* I LOVED HER. Then I was pissed I hadn’t cared all along. Now when I come across someone who doesn’t like her I can’t help but spew some high-minded shit about how she means so much more. I can’t help it… I get her and I love her. Viva la GaGa.
She may suck and we all may hate her, but no pop star has ever been as smart about their own position as this one.
I don’t think she’ll ever have any personal problems dog her, nor will she end up any coked-out mess. She’s always known the kind of monster she’s fucking with. And that’s why it appears she’s winning the game.
I’m a little slow on trends or miss them completely, so I was initially indifferent to Lady Gaga. But I found her music very enjoyable, and her videos have plots and great dancing. Lady Gaga is foremost an entertainer in every sense of the word. She actually reminds me of MJ- without the lifelong tragedies- because with all of MJ’s music and dancing, which he could have taken to more “serious” venues, he knew what audiences love, gave it to them, and loved it. She offers the kind of entertainment that many people love. And for people who love to hate, she serves as an outlet for that, too.
It’s unlikely she will end up like Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan etc… She really hasn’t produced any major scandals over risky behavior. Maybe becoming famous in her 20s helped her avoid the whole teen star thing. Whether or not you like her persona or music, she seems to be one of the smartest pop stars around.
I actually do hate the Beatles too. Good call.
Off to see Lady Gaga tomorrow and helped friends I am going with get outfits together since they are so excited to see her. The friends are 21 and 28 I am 55. I just get it, it is fun. She is talented. I like many types of music but the thing I noticed is she has educated many of the younger people I know about the musicians and looks she is referencing it is a connection to the past for them and they think it is cool. Grace Jones, David Bowie, Queen, Joey Arias….. the list goes on.
So tomorrow I go with a group of younger people to the concert and then after party it will be a blast. I am going for me and also to see people having fun watching someone that has put some energy back into going out.
Some hipsters can be so bitter…. and silly! Why would u take time away from listening to Head like a Kite or Atmosphere to hate on a pop star? Gaga is incredible and offers alot to many different groups ( girls, gays and the non- beautiful non-hipsters) Her music ain’t rocket science, but should all music require a Phd to enjoy? The haters will hate, and waste their time telling all of us Gaga lovers how lame and clueless we are….. those are the people who Gaga said she “locked out of the Tdome on Saturday”, thank god for that! Thanx David 4 at least giving the Lady a fair shake!
are you sure she got a nose job? those old brunette pics of her look….well….pretty much the same. only, you know, brunette. Regardless of all of this, I would just like to say that I hope she continues to eschew trousers for the duration of her fabulous posterior.
Madonna only gets worse with age and lack of talent and overhyped exposure. Why shouldn’t the same thing happen to an equally talented Englishwoman?
The only thing either woman has any talent for is wearing outrageous clothes on fairly nice figures.
Dammit. Have to admit I musta missed a memo somewhere….what the fuck is a “K-hole,” and why would a Teutonic chant be coming from one? Just curious. Cuz it’s the most interesting thing in this whole….hole.
@38: Me too. But I fucking love Lady Gaga.
Dear David Schmader: The subtitles were in Swedish. How could a professional journalist like you miss that, the video a) being directed by a Swede (Åkerlund) and b) co-starring a Swede (Skarsgård). And you even call Gaga ABBA-esque! Guess you got distracted by your own cleverness and forgot to do some research. But I still like you. Sorta.
I wish I could be a member of Club No Pants like her 🙂 I was one of those mid-20s people that got hooked almost immediately and drove my husband nuts with earworms.
I love the videos, too. They tell stories and some tell longer stories together. That, and the one for Alejandro is HOT!