Will Paul Constant channel Don King like he did at last year’s party? Will a Stranger writer kiss a bouncer? Will the night end with ballerinas dancing on the bar? (Will I find my bow tie in time?)

So many questions.

What we know for sure:

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At the Moore Theater. Five bucks for a phenomenal party with the city’s best and brightest and smartest and sexiest. I can’t wait. You can’t wait. Nobody can wait!

Read all about the winners—Zia Mohajerjasbi, Jeffry Mitchell, Stacey Levine, the Cody Rivers Show, and Pacific Northwest Ballet—here.

Brend an Kiley has worked as a child actor in New Orleans, as a member of the junior press corps at the 1988 Republican National Convention, and, for one happy April, as a bootlegger’s assistant in Nicaragua....

6 replies on “The Genius Awards: The Final Countdown”

  2. Seattle’s most self important people, all gathering in one place! Some one call the people at Guinness about the circle jerk record! JOYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God, I can’t wait to see indie jesus mcginn!

  4. @2, you got that right!

    I really can’t stand self important people. You find them in a lot of creative fields, producing work that ultimately they only care about. And in their lighter moments, they’ll produce something like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/user/K80Blog#p/u/…

    Something like that is rife with inside jokes, and people speaking in bad British accents during down time, and listening to bands like They Might Be Giants. They can also be counted on to throw in 40 year old Monty Python references, and to have stood in line overnight waiting to see all three Star Wars movies.

    Worse than that, they probably have really intense conversations about really mundane things like blenders and the failure of the Kenner Close-n-Play, as well as the lack of honesty of the John Turturro character in “Quiz Show,” and wonder if Oliver North suffers from the same affliction.

    From there, they’ll turn on each other, transforming simple social get togethers into an unsolicited game of “Group Therapy,” each tries to top the other in call each other on personal bullshit, getting snarkier and nasty in the process, and then all holding hands and crying about the death of a friend’s cat.

    That’s the kind of people who are involved in these so called “Genius Awards,” so you might as well move along, head home, and watch 90210.

  5. PAUL CONSTANT BARELY PERFORMER

    MORE LIKE TRAINED RAT DOG.

    FETCH BOOK! MAKE FUN OF BLACKS! WEAR SUIT!

    GUT DAWG. C YA LATRRR!!!

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