Water? From the sky? Credit: 400tmax/ Getty Images
Water? From the sky?
Water? From the sky? 400tmax/ Getty Images

Forbes thinks Seattle is the best place for business! Seattle tops the list of Forbes’s Best Places for Businesses and Careers. Hot dog! Seattle was ranked on 14 metrics and scored the highest on all of them except, notably, business and living costs. Some of the other metrics were things like education, culture, and leisure opportunities. A lot of this article, predictably, is framed around Amazon, because what the hell isn’t framed around Amazon?

The Department of Justice says it’s okay for businesses to discriminate based on gender: Oh boy, it’s starting. The DOJ today told the U.S. Supreme Court that businesses can discriminate against workers depending on their gender, according to Bloomberg Law. Specifically, “Solicitor General Noel Francisco told the high court that a civil rights law banning sex discrimination on the job doesn’t cover transgender bias.” We’re really living on the dark timeline.

National environmental super PAC pours money into anti-Dino ad campaign: Nobody Nobody except the Seattle Times and crusty Republicans want Dino Rossi to win the seat in the 8th District. The League of Conservation Voters Victory Fund has put $1 million toward anti-Rossi campaigns. The LCV is trying to undermine Rossi’s claims that he has support from environmental groups. The reality is that Rossi sucks for the environment and sucks in general.

Sawant wants to revisit the “Amazon Tax”: Councilmember Kshama Sawant is determined to make up the missing money that the failed head tax was meant to raise for housing and homeless services. Sawant wants to either revive the head tax—the “Amazon Tax,” as she calls it—or find that money through cutting other parts of Mayor Jenny Durkan’s 2019 budget. Slowing police hiring, for example, could garner $48 million. No other council members have signed onto these ideas.

Two Seattle middle-schoolers dead in car crash: The crash near Cle Elum happened in August. A car with three boys in it attempted to pass another vehicle but instead went off the road and rolled. The driver, one of the boy’s parents, was suspected to be under the influence of prescription medication. He was wearing a seatbelt. None of the three boys were. The driver’s son died. Another boy was injured. The third suffered a traumatic brain injury and remained in the hospital after the crash. He died Monday. The driver faces criminal charges.

[Moisture intensifies]: I am absolutely vibrating with wet weather excitement. Give me precipitation or give me death, I say! I know it technically rained last night, but that was weak. I want storms. I want a moisture SURGE.

Congratulations to Seattle’s only journalists: Seattle Magazine has released its list of “Most Influential People of 2018.” The journalists who won include number-crunching Gene Balk from the Seattle Times and all of Crosscut. This is cool and all, but I think what’s really impressive is how beefy Gene Balk is—the FYI Guy is cut. Oh but, yeah, congrats on the award! Life is meaningless in the end.

New ID testing tech catches fake ID at Portland airport: The new Credential Authentication Technology (CAT) at PDX flagged a fraudulent ID on Saturday. The man fled the airport. His luggage had other fake IDs and shit you use to make fake IDs. CAT is being tested at 13 different airports currently. Port of Portland police are investigating the situation. The man hasn’t been located. He’s in the wind, on the lam, nameless and careless.

Amazon is the one thing Democrats believe in: Democrats don’t put their trust in the Almighty, they put their trust in Jeff Bezos. Amazon is the institution Dems trust the most.

Church arson suspect arrested: Last Thursday, a Beacon Hill church was the target of arson via Molotov cocktail. There were about 50 people in the church at the time of the incident. A man in his 30s was arrested in connection with the crime.

Whoops! Watch that subliminal messaging, Fox News, it’s a doozy!

Sorry, you didn’t win the lotto: No, no, it’s okay, please don’t cry. You’re not an idiot—you’re an optimist! Unfortunately, you weren’t the winner of the $1.537 billion Mega Millions jackpot. Shows you what optimism will get you. Somebody in South Carolina is. Lottery winners in South Carolina can remain anonymous so your envy may never be fully realized.

The best way to track our planet’s demise is through cemeteries: My pal Eleanor Cummins wrote this neat piece in Popular Science about how cemeteries are ecological treasure troves and often monitored by scientists to track the effects of climate change. It’s wild! Cemeteries used to be centers of urban life before green spaces like public parks existed. Their fauna is extensive and has been tracked and observed season-to-season to tangibly see the impact of climate change.

This Wall Street Journal article looks really cool but I don’t have a subscription: It’s about how people keep scattering their family members’ ashes at the Haunted Mansion Ride at Walt Disney World and the janitors who have to vacuum them up. I don’t know much more because this paywall is a bitch. Anyone with a subscription wanna summarize in the comments?

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Nathalie Graham covers anything she finds fun, weird, or interesting. You can find a lot of that in her column, Play Date. Her work has also appeared around town in The Seattle Times, GeekWire, and the...