Japanese PM’s Ruling Bloc Expected To Win Upper House: Exit polls suggest Prime Minister Shinzo Abe’s Liberal Democratic Party has won a majority of the 121 contested seats in the upper house, giving the party control over both houses of parliament. The victory would end a standoff in parliament that hindered policies for the last six years.

Bombing Nemo: A training exercise took a turn for the worse as two U.S. fighter jets launched four unarmed bombs into Australia’s Great Barrier Reef Marine Park. The navy said the pilots launched the bombs because they were low on fuel, and couldn’t land with the bomb load.

Muslim Brotherhood Rejects Return To Dialogue: Interim Egyptian Prime Minister Hazem el-Beblawi gave his first TV interview, calling for the country to unite. He said, “The country can’t continue to be divided, the first objective for any government under these circumstances is to achieve reconciliation. The Muslim Brotherhood has rejected to take part in any dialogue until Mohamed Morsi is returned to power.

Hey God, Satan’s Got You Beat: At one point during the Texas abortion bill HB2 protests, pro-choice activists chanted “Hail Satan!” to drown out pro-life chanting. Magus Peter H. Gilmore, High Priest of the Church of Satanism, told CNN that the chanting was “ludicrous and meaningless,” but used the opportunity to clarify the church’s stance on abortion: “Religion should neither force upon nor deny an abortion for any woman, in our thinking.” Hell yeah!

Trayvon Martin’s Cousin Joins Seattle Rally: The “Justice for Trayvon” rally drew hundreds of people in front of the downtown federal courthouse yesterday. The speakers at the rally included Trayvon Martin’s cousin, Cedric President-Turner, who wants to work as a “catalyst to bring more awareness and help bring change.” A re-enactment of Martin’s death will be performed Monday evening at Westlake Park.

3-Year-Old Takes 3 Story Fall: A child fell out of a third story apartment window in the University District yesterday afternoon. He is in critical conditions with neck and head injuries. UW medicine says this is surprisingly common, Harborview Medical Center treats 30-50 kids that fall out of windows every year.

Eeeeeewwwww: A power outage yesterday morning at a sewer lift station ended up releasing around 40,000 gallons of sewage into Port Gardner Bay in Everett. Signs have been posted warning people to stay out of the water until it returns to normal. It’s still probably better than the Hudson River.

Belgium Gets A New King: Crown Prince Philippe is the new king of Belgium after his father Albert II abdicated due to health problems. 53-year-old Philippe hopes to keep the country united. The New Flemish Alliance in the Dutch speaking North wants to break away from the country to establish a republic of their own.

But Who Cares About Belgium! Do we have a royal baby yet?

Well shit.