Yes, being gay makes you an oppressed minority. Now that we have that established, I would like to point out that you are white. This may seem confusing for you, but you have a dual life. You’re a minority who also enjoys white privilege. I know this is a lot to take in, and I know that you feel frustrated anytime anyone accuses you of being racist, and I know that there are a lot of things you want to say to defend yourself, and let me guess—all of them get you in more trouble. That’s because you’re doing it wrong. Here are the most common reactions people like you throw at people like me when I point out that something you’ve said or done is racist.
“I’m gay, how could I be racist?”
Homosexuality is not a race. I am black. I am also gay. I am not gayack or blagay. Being in one minority group doesn’t excuse being insensitive to another minority group. If I were to walk around dressed in a kimono with my eyes taped back for a slantlike effect, it should not come as a surprise if any and all Asian persons took offense to it. I promise you, none of them would stop and think to themselves, “Oh wait, he’s black. It’s totally cool.”
“I have a good friend that is [insert
ethnicity].”
Categorizing your friends based on ethnicity is a racist act in itself: There is no quota to fill when it comes to the diversity of your group of friends, and constantly announcing their ethnicity causes them to be more of a novelty than the individual people they are. Also, your friends should definitely not be your first line of defense when someone calls you out on being racially insensitive. Your “friend” doesn’t represent an entire race. Last I checked, we don’t elect representatives for each race to confirm what is and what isn’t considered racist. As a matter of fact, each race has millions of people who have their own experience with racism and how they respond to it.
I am an African immigrant; my experience with racism is different than someone who is black American, even though we have similar skin color. Because of my background and upbringing, there are some things that I would not immediately acknowledge as racist. For example, I know all the lyrics to the song “Pick a Bale of Cotton.” If you’re not familiar, it’s a jovial song about the joys of picking a bale of cotton. There is a lot of jumping, turning around, and exclaiming, “Oh Lordy!” I was taught this song by my white music teacher while I was part of a predominantly black fifth-grade class in Fresno, California. I am not upset at said music teacher, because she was genuinely a nice woman who taught in inner-city schools and probably just loved that repugnant slave song without thinking too deeply about the lyrics. However, I would hold no qualms if a fellow classmate decided to call her out for subjecting descendants of slavery to the Uncle Tom of Negro spirituals.
However, there are also some things that come off as blatantly racist to me (e.g., Disney’s The Lion King, Popeyes chicken commercials, and everything Tyler Perry) that others may just brush off.
“But I voted for Obama.”
Are you admitting to voting for the president based on his race?! Please, from now on, vote for our leaders based on merit and experience. You got lucky this last time, but I can’t promise that the next black president you blindly vote for won’t start a “beheading all white people” initiative the moment he or she steps into office.
Or are you trying to tell me that because you voted for Obama, a supposedly nonracist action, everything you do/say from that point on could not be deemed as racist?! Have you not been paying attention the last three years? Obama has been on the receiving end of some of the most finely executed subtle racism I have ever witnessed (seriously, medals should be given out for excellence in the artistry of subtle racism, and winners should be shot afterward). And some of these practitioners of subtle racism are former/current Obama supporters. If I had a nickel for every time the phrase “he’s one of the good ones” was uttered with regard to Obama by the population of this country over the last few years, I would send a thank-you note to the magic nickel machine that made me a gajillionaire. The most annoying part is that Obama, THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, can’t do anything about these comments except take them in stride.
“Get over it.”
I will give you a moment to collect your teeth now that I’ve punched you in the mouth. You got them all? Good. Now sit.
Exactly what do you mean by “Get over it”? Am I getting over your racist actions? Am I getting over my own personal history with racism? Am I getting over the centuries (yes, CENTURIES!) of oppression that my ancestors endured? “Get over it” is something you say to a 13-year-old who is angry at his parents for not allowing him to have an unlimited texting plan. “Get over it” is not something you say to an adult who has suffered a lifetime (yes, a LIFETIME!) of being victimized by racism.
“Okay, I’m out of excuses. What should I really do?”
Apologize. Yes, it’s that easy. I know you’re upset and you believe you had good intentions. Unfortunately, intentions are not visible. I know it sucks being called racist when you feel you’re not, but I promise you that it is far worse being on the receiving end of racism.
Just remember that the person upset with you is projecting from a place of suffering and endless frustration. Take a moment to listen, let them vent, and apologize. I know it’s not fun to deal with misdirected anger, but sometimes proving that you are not racist is hearing people out and letting them have their moment to release that anger. It’s something we should all do in these circumstances, because that’s what grown-ups are supposed to do.
“What if the person accusing me of being racist is white, too?”
You lucky bastard! You know another white person who is in tune enough to stop you from looking like a jackass in front of a group of minorities. You should stop reading this right now and go hug this person.
“Seriously? I know I’m not racist. There are just too many overly sensitive bleeding hearts in the world.”
Oh, well in that case… GO FUCK YOURSELF, YOU RACIST PIECE OF SHIT! 
Solomon Georgio is a comedian and a member of the comedy production group Children of the Atom (www.childrenoftheatom.net).
amazeballs x
This, a million times this.
There is one thing. There is a difference between making a racist comment and being racist. Granted, many racist comments are made by racists, but also, many racist comments are made by ignorant or misspoken moments. Take your teacher who taught the “Pick a bale of cotton” song. If she did not know it’s history, she’s not racist, she’s ignorant of the meaning. Calling her a racist is a disservice. Also recognize that we all have moments of ignorance. I recently had a conversation with a coworker about the term ‘ghetto’ which he thought was a term only applied to black americans, and I had to educate him about Venice and the Jews. I didn’t take offense, because I knew he wasn’t trying to belittle the history and suffering of my people, he just had never been taught that.
Sure, I agree, don’t let subtle racism or overt racism stand unchallenged. However, when possible, I think you should give people the benefit of the doubt, if for no other reason than if somebody feels they were unjustly labeled as racist with no education or explanation, they’ll just assume there is nothing they can do to improve themselves.
F#&king Awesome! Thank you Solomon.
For years, as a bi-racial gay man, I bought into the assumption that because we’re minorities and oppressed, racism or prejudice in the gay community would not impede my happiness.
Boy was I wrong.
I turned the rejection inward as a personal failing – my appearance, my weight, etc. Now I understand that gay white men are just not that into me because they’ve grown up with the same segregated, isolated culture as their straight brethren.
@3) In anti-oppression circles, we refer to people like that (and self identify as white people) as anti-racist racists. Even if our goal is to be as non-racist as possible, we’re still white people (often men) who benefit from all that privilege and can only work as hard as possible to fight against it.
Racism is a lot more subtle and nuanced than KKK members burning crosses on the streets. It’s also all the minor shit that well-assuming people do without thinking about it.
—-
LOVED the section about apologizing. Sometimes we put feet in our mouth. After doing so, backtrack and try to learn why something you said upset someone else.
@OP – you’re an African. Chances are, the only race oppressing your ancestors was your own.
@5, Fuck off.
@ 5, Fuck off 2 X. I live just outside DC, an area where race relations are complicated. you = part of the problem
But thanks for reminding me why I don’t usually bother w/ unregistered comments, anymore.
@7 – Or the English, French, Dutch, Belgian, Arab, East Indian, German, Spanish or Italian people colonizing/living in Africa.
Excellent post.
I learned that song too. “You gotta jump down, turn around, pick a bale of dacron. Jump down, turn around, pick some nylon too.”
Okay So I understand correcting people when they do racist things. That’s wrong obviously. But since when is it racist to just be white? I don’t see why I should be punished for “enjoying white privilege” I can’t help being born white nor was I the one who put these privileges into place. I think everyone should be afforded the same privelages, but I also don’t think I should be assumed a racist because of something my ancestors did.
which firesign theater album was that, fnarf? don’t crush that dwarf?
So i understand that there is white privelage and that is wrong. But since when is simply being born white make me a racist?
@6. I agree that life in the United States favors the white (and particularly the wealthy) ethnicity, and that awareness of that is important. However, racist is a very harsh term and is a horrible umbrella to classify people under, especially if their only mistake is a lack on knowledge or a lack of forethought. Call them insensitive….call them dumb….but I worry that if people feel they are always one mistake, one slipup, one misinterpretation away from being pushed under that umbrella, it causes a backlash of disinterest in racial struggles as a whole. We have to give people an allowance to express themselves and use critical thinking and intelligent judgment to determine if the person is racist.
This is excellent. One small quibble, “Pick A Bale of Cotton” is a folksong or worksong, not a spiritual.
F#&king Awesome! Thank you Solomon.
For years, as a bi-racial gay man, I bought into the assumption that because we’re minorities and oppressed, racism or prejudice in the gay community would not impede my happiness.
Boy was I wrong.
I turned the rejection inward as a personal failing – my appearance, my weight, etc. Now I understand that gay white men are just not that into me because they’ve grown up with the same segregated, isolated culture as their straight brethren.
@15 You make great points. Yes, it is ignorance that can manifest as prejudice. And yes, people throw the ‘racist’ word around too easily. This equation makes it simple:
Prejudice + Power = Racism
@10 – and yet, over thousands of years, the oppression of those invading groups is merely a drop in the bucket compared to the oppression native Africans managed to do just fine on their own.
People like you really do annoy the shit out of me – pretending Africa, my home, btw – was some sort of mythical Eden where everyone got along and no one was raped, murdered, or enslaved before those dastardly Euros came over. Or the Arabs. Or anyone else you may care to mention. There never was such a time, or place. Human beings really are the same everywhere. It’s dismissive and condescending to perpetuate this ‘poor, defenseless native’ bs. The slave trade could never have occurred without the hearty, enthusiastic support and assistance of Africans. Native, black Africans. Pretending otherwise is disingenuous.
@19, And yet still, fuck off. Your statement that “humans really are the same everywhere” is in direct conflict with your constant blather about black people having a predisposition to murder and rape. Fuck the fuck off you fucking fuck.
“You know another white person who is in tune enough to stop you from looking like a jackass in front of a group of minorities. You should stop reading this right now and go hug this person.”
Racist.
@18 your definition is horse shit.
I got stabbed and almost killed by a black man who was calling me a “white motherfucker”.
If “power” was required for him to qualify as racist, he had all the power he needed with his knife to stab with and his mouth.
@13, I believe it’s “How Can You Be In Two Places At Once (When You’re Not Anywhere At All)”.
@18
I guess your definition means that it is impossible for whites to be racist when they are in Zimbabwe.
@23 He can’t be racist, he’s black.
@22.
19 is not the same racist troll as me
Whites can’t be racist when they are in Zimbabwe!
Jews can be racist when they are in Israel, but those same Jews can’t be racist when they are in Saudi Arabia!
Please don’t call me white.
Whites make up less than ten percent of the world’s population.
Whites can’t be racist when they are in Detroit!
“I know it’s not fun to deal with misdirected anger, but sometimes proving that you are not racist is hearing people out and letting them have their moment to release that anger.”
Who the fuck has to prove they’re not racist? And why the fuck do you think it’s alright to subject people to your misdirected anger?
Since you can’t internet punch me in the mouth, get over it. Seriously, get the fuck over it.
We’re all the ancestors of slaves. Fucking deal with it. You’re not special. Again, Get over it.
This kind of “progressive” “academic” “anti-racist” fact-ignoring, logic-ignoring idiocy about race fits almost all the criteria for a BRAINWASHING CULT.
Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism: A Study of “Brainwashing” in China is a psychology non-fiction book on brainwashing and mind control by Robert Jay Lifton.
“Eight Criteria for Thought Reform”:
1. Milieu Control. This involves the control of information and communication both within the environment and, ultimately, within the individual, resulting in a significant degree of isolation from society at large.
2. Mystical Manipulation. The manipulation of experiences that appears spontaneous but is, in fact, planned and orchestrated by the group or its leaders in order to demonstrate divine authority, spiritual advancement, or some exceptional talent or insight that sets the leader and/or group apart from humanity, and that allows reinterpretation of historical events, scripture, and other experiences.
3. Demand for Purity. The world is viewed as black and white and the members are constantly exhorted to conform to the ideology of the group and strive for perfection. The induction of guilt and/or shame is a powerful control device used here.
4. Confession. Sins, as defined by the group, are to be confessed either to a personal monitor or publicly to the group. There is no confidentiality; members’ “sins,” “attitudes,” and “faults” are discussed and exploited by the leaders.
5. Sacred Science. The group’s doctrine or ideology is considered to be the ultimate Truth, beyond all questioning or dispute. Truth is not to be found outside the group. The leader, as the spokesperson for God or for all humanity, is likewise above criticism.
6. Loading the Language. The group interprets or uses words and phrases in new ways so that often the outside world does not understand. This jargon consists of thought-terminating clichés, which serve to alter members’ thought processes to conform to the group’s way of thinking.
7. Doctrine over person. Member’s personal experiences are subordinated to the sacred science and any contrary experiences must be denied or reinterpreted to fit the ideology of the group.
8. Dispensing of existence. The group has the prerogative to decide who has the right to exist and who does not. This is usually not literal but means that those in the outside world are not saved, unenlightened, unconscious and they must be converted to the group’s ideology. If they do not join the group or are critical of the group, then they must be rejected by the members. Thus, the outside world loses all credibility. In conjunction, should any member leave the group, he or she must be rejected also.
So is the article on black homophobia is coming next?
If the Stranger is so supposedly “anti-racist” and all about “dismantling white privilege” then why are there only 2 black writers at the stranger? Or maybe really one, I don’t think Mudede actually counts since he has white-wife privilege.
I absolutely agree that all of these weak responses in defensive of being called racist are very revealing, but none of them are new – they’ve been around for years and should be retired for good. What would be more informative, I think, would be if you could share the original comments that were made which prompted these lame, racist responses. Maybe then racist behavior can be unlearned.
Another youthful humorless hand wringing privilege dance. So dated and stupid.
@26 Where are your examples of Zimbabwe racism against Whites?
@24 Read it again, my equation did not say ‘for Blacks only’
So what exactly were those racist behaviors that prompted this article? Cause that would be useful for us privileged ignorant white shmucks to know.
@3: “There is one thing. There is a difference between making a racist comment and being racist.”
Bullshit, to some extent.
You don’t have to be a card-carrying armband-wearing Neo Nazi, or even consider yourself to be a racist to be one.
It’s also difficult to fit people into hard “racist” categories, aside from “people who hold racist thoughts and ideas.”
Does that make you a racist? Yes! Does that encompass all of you? No!
The sooner someone comes to terms with their own bigotry, the better.
And “I can’t be a bigot because…” is the definite way to never ever change your ways.
@40 http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/…
Got a lot of thoughts about this… but here’s what’s at the forefront atm:
I’m bothered by the unspoken implication that blacks have a monopoly on experiencing racism. I’m disturbed by the blatant statement that only minority groups can experience discrimination.
I’m a white woman, and I moved to The South in my early 20s. I wasn’t there a day before I realized there were places I wasn’t wanted because my skin was too pale. And, as a woman, I represent 51% of the population, a majority, yet I won’t earn as much in my lifetime in a given career as a man with the same set of skills and abilities.
So, essentially, take your sense of entitlement and shove it. You are certainly not unique in experiencing these sorts of things. Am I hurt and offended that I was run out of restaurants and dance halls in the south because I’m white? Sure. Do I think for a second that gives me the right to turn my anger on someone who probably made a very un-PC joke unknowing that it might be a sensitive subject? Hell no. Do I expect them to apologize for shit they didn’t do? Uhm… again, Hell no. The sheer arrogance of being offended on behalf of your ancestors.. really! I’m no more responsible for the choices of someone dead a hundred years than I am responsible for the choices of my parents, both still alive and kickin. Grown ass adults making grown ass adult decisions hardly require your defensive reaction to validate their life and experiences. You wanna take offense at the steaming pile that’s been heaped on you during your life, go for it, but don’t you think that’s plenty without trying to bury yourself in the steaming pile of history? Learn from it, but don’t carry it around like a ball and chain. Yeesh.
I’m glad I had the experiences I did, they certainly widened my understanding of the world. I still appreciate a good stereotyping black joke as much as I appreciate a good stereotyping honkey joke. Which is to say, in general, they crack me up, mostly cuz I’ve known folks who fit both profiles. And no, I’m not planning to apologize for laughing. You want my teeth? Come get em.
This article is boring and would generically fit anyone, not particularly enlightening to the gay. The supposed racist gay here (or dyke? really?) is a straw man. Real queers aren’t to be found burning crosses or throwing the Ennword around (outside of playacting/hipster doofus shit – not that there’s anything right with that). I’m with #41: specifics or it didn’t happen!
I’m gay and a lot of my jokes/comments are horribly misogynist.
44, 45, 47, 48: Fly back to Stormfront, where they’re dying to know the latest in hatred.
@51: Also statistics taken entirely from your ass.
You hate gays and you hate blacks, and like a good Neo-Nazi, anything you can do to get them fighting each other is a victory.
We’re not biting.
I remember watching an interview with the creators of that piece of crap show, Queer as Folk. When asked why they lacked diversity in the main cast, their answer was ” we ARE a minority! We’re gay! “
I like how people are starting to ask Solomon for proof that people have said racist shit to him. As if it’s more likely that he just made all this stuff up. Get your birth certificate ready, Solomon.
I am a racist, especially after reading a lot of these comments
Blacks are just as racist as whites. They just lack the social capital to do anything about it. Whites are no more/less racist than anyone else. Get over it.
Wow, there’s sure a lot of defensiveness here. I’m sorry, I missed the part where the author said that white people need to apologize for benefiting from their privilege. He didn’t say that; he said that we need to acknowledge our privilege, and try to recognize when that comes out in ignorant/racists words and actions.
In fact, the defensiveness I see here may be *exactly* what he’s talking about for much of the column.