Good morning! It’s beautiful and sunny as I write this, and theoretically it’s supposed to stay that way. We’ve got one of those not-a-cloud-in-the-sky forecasts. But, in spring in Seattle, reporting a weather prediction feels a little bit like reading tarot cards. It’s fun, maybe it shapes how you spend your day, but it’s really all on vibes.
Let’s do the news.
Trump Administration Breaks Their Own Rules: You know that $1.8 billion slush fund that Trump’s DOJ established to give payouts to allies that have been victims of “lawfare” and “mistreatment” from the federal government? The money comes from a fund meant to pay settlements when people sue the feds. The deal, which was struck between the president’s lawyers and his own administration (basically, a deal between Trump and Trump), without the involvement of a judge, would allow the DOJ to give huge sums of money to people who had not sued the government—like January 6 rioters looking for restitution for the time they served in jail. Turns out, that doesn’t just violate the long-standing policies of the DOJ. The New York Times pointed out that former Attorney General Pam Bondi established a policy last year, explicitly stating that payouts can’t go to people who haven’t already sued the feds. The DOJ did not respond to their request for comment.
But you know who are suing the feds? Two DC police officers who were at the Capitol on January 6, 2021. They say in their suit that the Trump administration created a “slush fund to finance the insurrectionists and paramilitary groups that commit violence in his name.”
Meanwhile: Trump gave a commencement speech at the US Coast Guard Academy. He said he was thrilled to be the first president to give the commencement speech twice (he wasn’t). He rambled about the War in Iran. He said virtually the same things he said to the graduating class in 2017. He said he had to invite women onto the stage to avoid being accused of discrimination (sound familiar, Team USA?). And he hit on the young men. “I hate good-looking men,” he said to a young man named Matthew. And to a cadet named Thomas: “Look at the muscles on this guy.” “I like to see what these guys are like!” he said.
But Trump Has “Lots of Good Ideas”: According to Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos, who graced the American public with a deluge of “good ideas” in an interview on CNBC’s Squawk Box. “He’s been right about a lot of things,” he said. “You have to give him credit where credit is due.” He claimed that Trump has been “more mature, more disciplined” in his second term. In the same interview, Bezos also defended his decision to lay off a third of the Washington Post’s newsroom staff. “The Post needs to be a profitable enterprise that stands on its own two feet,” he said. “Let me tell you why. Because it’s a measure of its relevance. If people won’t pay for our product, it’s not a good enough product. It would be like poetry without rhyming, it’s too easy.” Who’s gonna tell him?
Here’s a headline for ya: “An 81-Year-Old Grandma Streaming Minecraft To Pay For Grandson’s Cancer Treatment Has Been Swatted.” Every subsequent word is a surprise. And every subsequent word is worse.
Is homeownership feeling especially out of reach these days? It’s understandable. According to the Seattle Times, “the cost of a monthly mortgage payment is now well beyond double the cost of median rent here—among the largest gaps in the country.” The median rent for someone in Seattle who’s recently moved is already $2,100. But a mortgage? You’re looking at $4,500 a month.
Have you been following the Walter Cup? If you tuned out of Women’s hockey after the Seattle Torrent’s season ended, I don’t blame you. But I’ve got an update for ya: Last night, the Montréal Victoire won the Walter Cup. This is the first time a Canadian team has won the cup (the Minnesota Frost won the past two years). It’s also the first time a female coach has won.
Bruce Harrell Has a New Job: He’s the new CEO at Filium, a Seattle-based sustainable textile startup founded in 2015. Their whole thing is making water-repelling materials that don’t have “forever chemicals” in them.
Baby Gorilla: In yesterday morning’s Slog AM, managing editor Megan Seling challenged our arts editor, Emily Nokes, to do the zoo’s new baby gorilla’s birth chart. And by golly, she did it. “What was I supposed to do? Not drop everything to quickly do amateur astrology for a newborn primate?” she wrote. “I need an important/whimsical distraction, and maybe you do too.” Our new little resident is a Taurus. Their moon is in Gemini, and they’re a Gemini rising. Emily tells you what it all means, with an important reminder: “Astrology is real and is never wrong! If you don’t like it, don’t read about it, bye!”
IMAX Fans, Assemble: The Boeing IMAX, the only premium IMAX theater of its kind in the state, will not be showing theatrical films under new ownership, Stranger contributor Chase Hutchinson reports.“We weren’t looking to operate a theater,” said Sevart, the CEO of the Space Needle Corporation, which bought the theater earlier this year. Instead, Sevart said the theater would show various “content” that will be determined more in the future. Locals in the film industry are hoping to build a pressure campaign to change his mind.
I’ll leave you with this video from Stranger senior writer Charles Mudede, who has been following the reconstruction of the 747 on Denny Way. Why did developers put an airplane between two towers? What’s it going to be used for? Who gets to use it?
