A Case for Layers: Today will be partly sunny with a high near 82. Tonight, we’ll drop into the low 60s. Same story on Saturday, Sunday, and Labor Day.

WA Lawmakers Speak Out Against Firefighter Arrests: Yesterday, ICE agents hauled off two immigrants fighting the Bear Gulch fire on the peninsula, currently the largest wildfire in the state. Gov. Bob Ferguson is “deeply concerned.” Rep. Emily Randall (D-Bremerton) posted “THIS IS NOT MAKING AMERICA SAFER.” Rep. Pramila Jayapal (D-Seattle) said it was cruel, the Seattle Times reports.

Devilish Eggs: Salmonella-tainted eggs have sickened at least 95 people in 14 states including Washington. California’s Country Eggs LLC has halted production and recalled large, brown, cage-free (salmonella-added) “sunshine yolks” and “omega-3 golden yolks.” If they’re in your fridge (cartons “contain the code CA 7695 and have sell-by dates of July 1 through Sept. 16,” the AP reports), toss ’em at your nearest federal agent and be known as “egg guy” forever.

Get Light Railed (the Federal Way): Sound Transit says the trains will start rolling to Kent Des Moines, Star Lake, and Federal Way starting December 6. Between 18,000 and 23,000 passengers are expected to board at the new downtown stations. The tracks and stations cost $2.5 billion (a good chunk came from grants and the federal government, when it still funded shit).

They Didn’t Thrift This: A raid on a south Seattle pawn shop turned up a heap of jewelry that police say was stolen from several celebrities and athletes, including a custom Sounders MLS Cup ring and a Seahawks ring taken from Macklemore’s Capitol Hill home in June. The “primary” robbery suspect was arrested in Renton last week. The pawn shop owner is under investigation for trafficking stolen property and was booked in King County jail. Prosecutors say Macklemore’s children were sleeping during the robbery, but burglars restrained and bear-sprayed their nanny before she bit one of their hands, escaped through the bathroom, and called for help.

ICYMI: The very first thing that comes up when you Google “Joe Fain” KUOW is this 2018 headline: “‘You raped me.’ Former Seattle official accuses Washington state Sen. Joe Fain of rape.” Now he could be elected to the station’s Board of Directors. I reported on it here.

Know the Playbook: Christian supremacist musician Sean Feucht is coming to town and he doesn’t just want to play guitar. He wants to play you! For The Stranger, writer Kate Burns lays out how the rage machine works.

Jesus Fucking Christ We’re All Going to Die of Preventable Disease: Jim O’Neill, a biotech investor who is not a physician, will be new acting head of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. O’Neill, deputy secretary at Health and Human Services and ally to Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and tech billionaire Peter Theil, takes over after CDC officials resigned because they didn’t want to be party to dangerous anti-vaccine policy. O’Neill says he supports vaccines, but so does RFK Jr., who definitely doesn’t, so we’ll have to watch what O’Neill actually does. Hopes are not high. RFK Jr. and his minions fetishize a “natural” healthy world that doesn’t exist. Nutrition is good, but take medicines away and people hack, gasp, cough, shake, and shit themselves to death. That’s just how it works.

CDC Employees Walk Out: Generally speaking, people who work at the center where they control and prevent diseases like controlling and preventing disease. Workers staged a “clap out” Thursday to applaud the senior leaders who resigned.

White House Will Invade Chicago From Nearby Naval Base: The Trump administration could send 200 homeland security officers to the base ahead of an immigration crackdown. Documents suggest its planning a sustained operation, possibly for the month of September, again using military resources for domestic law enforcement, The New York Times reports. Trump said after Chicago, they’ll “help” with New York. Illinois Governor JB Pritzker, who is, like Gavin Newsom, a steely Trump critic (but unlike Newsom, not a self-serving blowhard staging a presidential run like a Hollywood production) warned Trump not to send National Guard troops to his state.

Israel Bombards Gaza City: Foreign ministers in Ireland, Spain, Norway, Slovenia, Iceland, and Luxembourg have released a joint statement condemning Israel’s new offensive. Israel has killed at least 51 Palestinians since dawn, including aid seekers and several people in the al-Mawasi area, “a so-called ‘humanitarian zone,’” Al Jazeera reports. Gaza’s health ministry says Israel has killed over 63,000 Palestinians. At least 322 have died of starvation, the ministry says.

Israel Asks Global Hunger Monitor to Retract Accurate Report: The Integrated Food Security Phase Classification (IPC) found a quarter of Palestinians in Gaza are experiencing famine, a number  likely to rise by the end of September. Israel told the IPC in a letter that its findings were inaccurate and biased toward Hamas. The IPC didn’t answer this letter.

Trump ends Harris’ Secret Service Protection Early: Under federal law, presidents get a lifetime of Secret Service, VPs usually get it for six months. But before leaving office, Biden signed an order extending Harris’ security detail for an additional year. Her protection now ends on September 1. She’s about to embark on a public, national book tour for A Master Class in Losing in 107 Days, CNN reports.

Frisk This Guy for Poison Vials: Vice President JD Vance says President Trump is definitely fine, but he’s ready to step in if his health fails. I mean, yeah … that is what a Vice President is for… and Trump is the oldest man to ever assume office … but also, why say this to one of America’s largest newspapers, USA Today, which noted Trump’s swollen, veiny, blood sausage legs, even if they ask? Like Vance, it’s just weird. The part that makes me laugh though, is that Vance told the paper he’s gotten “a lot of good on-the-job training “over the last 200 days.” Buddy, obviously standards are low right now, but after 200 days, they wouldn’t let you run a Quiznos with a failing health rating.

 

[image or embed]

— Tim Onion (@bencollins.bsky.social) August 28, 2025 at 3:46 PM

 

Oh: The family of a Texas man basically cremated alive in his Cybertruck is suing Tesla for wrongful death caused by their tinderbox of a car (the inferno hit 5,000 degrees, partially disintegrating his bones). When Michael Sheehan, 47, crashed his car into a culvert near Houston, the battery failed. Because the doors are electrically operated, and the manual releases are hard to find in an emergency, Sheehan was effectively sealed inside, the lawsuit alleges.

Nathalie recommends this long read: The headline says it all: Sixteen Hours With a Texas Woman Seeking Legal Abortion, from Texas Monthly.

Vivian McCall is The Stranger's interim Editor-in-Chief. In her private life, she is a musician and Wii U apologist. If you’re reading this, you either love her or hate her.

37 replies on “Slog AM: Vance Is Ready to Take Over if Trump Dies, White House Prepares to Invade Chicago, Friend of Peter Thiel to Head CDC”

  1. Stay with me here, what if the handles you use to get out of your car when it’s not engulfed in flames are the same ones you use in an emergency? If you need a youtube video to find the “emergency exit” to your highly explosive vehicle it is all but guaranteed to not end well for someone.

  2. Oh I love that hot dog tag! It’s so cute and it always makes me smile whenever I see it. My favorite is the one-eyed black cat I’ve seen on the freeway though.

  3. It’s nice that nobody seems to take it seriously anymore when Israel accuses NGOs documenting their human rights abuses of being biased toward Hamas.

    Also +1 to @10 please everyone let this new weirdo just flame out.

  4. @14 you’re going to be banned just like all your previous accounts so it doesn’t matter anyway but it’s not that people want an echo chamber just that no one likes whiny little bitches

  5. @15, see @10 @13.

    barth @15: “it’s not that people want an echo chamber just that no one likes whiny little bitches.” Ah, if only our preeminent feeder of MAGA trolls had enough self-awareness to take this advice and reflect on how they themself are perceived. There’s fighting fire with fire, and then there’s descending to their level.

    Anyway, it’s great to see Max Solomon commenting ever so briefly here. Same for mike blob. Don’t give up, gentlemen.

    And to use the language of another commenter here regarding Max’s fine advice to DFTT, I would be perfectly fine with these comment sections becoming a MAGA circle-jerk echo chamber. These aspiring fascists would wind up just a collection of madmen and spammers shouting into the void. See what happened to Eric Cartman in episode 1 of the new season of “South Park.”

  6. “Because

    the doors are

    electrically operated, and

    the manual releases are hard to

    find in an emergency, Sheehan was effectively

    sealed inside [& BAKED, @5,000°f], the lawsuit alleges.”

    don’t these

    Muxmobile Cyber-

    Panzer Swastikartruks

    Come with a

    Fucking

    BRICK?

    when Republican Fascists

    claim ad infinitum that it’s

    “All About the Cruelty,” see:

    Melon MUX for certain confirmations.

    you can buy a fucking Brick

    a good, Hard one for

    a couple dollars

    and mark them up*

    5,000%. Melon MUX

    you’re leaving Billion$

    on the fucking table, dude!

    *I bet the Deceased wished he’d bought

    a Nice one to go with his Cyber-

    panzer Swastikartruk.

    [sorry! def

    Too Soon].

    [‘Alligator Auschwitz’?

    meet the All New

    Swastikartruk

    Sizzleator!

    certain to get

    Laffs from the

    socio- & psycho-

    paths on the so-called

    ‘right’ wing, don’tchya think?]

  7. Cressona @ 16…

    Sometimes it’s fun to fuck with the trolls when you are bored.

    Other times… meh, let it slide.

    Now, as much as I appreciate Kristo, I still can’t understand why he thinks you and Tensor are the same person. You both have very different writing styles and viewpoints (at least from what I have read). If you are the same person for both, then well played, sir or madame. You got me. But I highly doubt that’s the situation.

    The current troll in this thread, I’m thinking is Valvoline, after getting banned yet again.

  8. @16

    “You

    both have

    very different

    writing styles and viewpoints

    (at least from what I have read).” –@drewl2

    Although:

    “And accusing progressive commenters of being

    right-wing operatives as the ultimate put-down

    is soooo Tensorna. Unfortunately, Tennie – or

    Cressie, or whatever your real name

    is, you’re not fooling anyone.”

    –@Libretto68 on August 15, 2025 at 4:04 PM

    “@27, 28

    same thing Cressy

    did to me, ages ago

    and I’d NEVER’ve

    Believed they were the

    one and same horrific commenter

    but This comment

    @28~that’s PURE

    Wormtongue

    @28 IS the Wormtongue

    very Poorly disguising

    itself. you gotta be

    more Patient in

    your Wrath’

    wormmy:

    you

    Just

    Outed

    Yourself.”

    kristofarian on August 15, 2025 at 4:48 PM

    I would’ve Agreed with you drew12

    until I read the above as well

    as this:

    Comment #28

    “Libretto68 @27,

    you sure do have me dead to rights. I

    see nothing gets past your astute powers of observation.

    I understand

    you need to try to do

    something to discredit me

    considering the hard time you’re

    having pushing back against me on

    the substance. So sure, please do keep

    randomly calling me tensorna every time

    I post a comment that offends you–you know

    a comment like standing up for Ukraine and liberal

    democracy or pushing back against MAGA. Rest assured

    it will only enhance your reputation as a sane and sensible commenter.”

    cressona on August 15, 2025 at 4:26 PM

    but This ^ comment, above,

    @28~that’s PURE

    Wormtongue

    @28 IS the Wormtongue

    very Poorly disguising

    itself. you gotta be

    more Patient in

    your Wrath’

    wormmy:

    you

    Just

    Outed

    Yourself.”

    –@kristo

  9. @19

    “@16”?

    you Idjt!

    that was for @18

    apologies for all

    the Confusion

    but Yeah that

    is wormmy.

    who is Good at throwing

    people off the scent but

    sometimes his Massive

    Ego gets in his Way.

    Oftimes.

  10. drewl2 @18, I can’t really comment on Kristo because I generally skip past his comments. To the best of my knowledge, this accusation originated with another commenter, and the simple answer is that they DON’T believe tensor and I are the same person. It’s just that accusing me of being tensor was the worst slur they could come up with to try to discredit an anti-MAGA voice who’s interested in challenging MAGA’s grip on power.

    In fact, I’m surprised that the commenter I have in mind hasn’t surfaced yet to lash out at my anti-MAGA comment @16.

  11. @21

    “It’s just that accusing

    me of being tensor was the

    worst slur they could come up with… ”

    –wormmy

    sans doubt

    “… to try to discredit an anti-MAGA voice…”

    Always the Victim

    “… who’s interested in challenging

    MAGA’s grip on power.”

    and always the Altruist

    “In fact, I’m surprised that the commenter

    I have in mind hasn’t surfaced yet to

    lash out

    at my anti-MAGA comment @16.”

    the more he doth protest

    the deeper the

    hole.

    C’Mon, wormmy:

    ffs put your

    BACK in-

    to it. C-

  12. Kristo’s return means my scrolling finger is getting the workout it needs to regain its old strength. It’s tough, but I’m up for it – need to ice the finger a bit in the evenings, that’s all.

  13. if Only

    You hadn’t

    been Told the

    Same, ‘growing up,’

    Yellah, just Think what

    You might have become

    break the Cycle:

    make America

    Great again!

  14. one troll to another

    allow me to axe

    you a question?

    strictly from an

    Aesthetics pov

    which do You

    Prefer? @29

    or @30(a)?

    this is strictly for

    my Own research

    and I Appreciate all

    the Help you can Give.

    thnx, yellah!

  15. @21: Liberetto68 seemed to claim he still believed his false accusation about us (https://www.thestranger.com/slog-am/2025/08/28/80215644/slog-am-feds-arrest-firefighters-fighting-bear-gulch-fire-ice-was-using-wa-department-of-licensing-data-trump-ousts-cdc-director/comments/56), but of course he ran away to hide after I asked him for evidence.

    IIRC, no accusation of sock-puppetry has ever been made here against a commenter who agreed with the Stranger’s positions; such accusations seem to be ways the Stranger’s supportive commenters convince themselves the Stranger has fewer critics than it in fact has, and those smaller number of critics are fundamentally dishonest. It’s cheap work all around, but easier for them to do than admit the Stranger cannot defend itself against our criticisms.

  16. tensorna @31, if somebody is making paranoid, conspiratorial accusations to try to discredit you, I’m not sure the answer is to make paranoid, conspiratorial accusations of your own–including against The Stranger. But you do you, Sawant-obsessed East Coast guy.

    Out of respect for my time and others’, I’ll have to make this my last comment on this thread. Tensor, I’ll let you get the last word. I’m sure you’ll put me in my place.

  17. @32: Well, you’re also the target of exactly the same “paranoid” accusations — although I don’t know about “conspiratorial,” given the accusations presume that you don’t even exist; so, if correct, we cannot, by definition, conspire. (In the speculative case where I ever actually care, I’d take the accusation I’m a dishonest sock-puppeteer over the accusation I’m merely someone else’s helpless sock-puppet.)

    Also, please note I’m not making an accusation against the Stranger, because to the best of my recollection, no headline poster here has ever made an accusation of sock-puppetry against a commenter.

    And, I’m not the only one “obsessed” with Sawant’s lasting negative effects on Seattle — which have proven especially cruel to exactly those persons who’d already endured a harsh struggle:

    “Some alarming issues have arisen especially from the combination of Fair Chance Housing, the Roommate Ordinance, and the Winter and School Year Eviction Moratorium.”

    […]

    “Sharon Lee, the Executive Director for the Low-Income Housing Institute, recently penned an opinion editorial in the Seattle Times stating the same issues as the private sector. Not for profit groups were recently given $14.2 million by King County to make them solvent once again because they were so far in the red from unpaid rent. If people don’t pay rent, housing groups cannot pay their operating and maintenance costs, and lastly no bank will lend money to build more affordable housing because the costs are not being covered for the buildings already in operation.”

    (https://www.rhawa.org/blog/rhawa-talks-with-george-petrie-of-goodman-real-estate#:~:text=This%20led%20GRE%20Downtowner%20to%20file%20a,22%2C%202024%20for%20a%20taking%20of%20property.)

    @23: For my laptop, Kristo’s release on bail or whatever had me re-charge my mouse, the one with the smooth and supple scrolling wheel. The browser on my mobile device has a “tap and hold to scroll” feature. Perhaps these might work well for you too? For the tech-savvy discerning reader, improving Slog needn’t be a slog! 😀

  18. kristo’s “release on Bail,” wormmy?

    I’m doing 230 Months of shit-posting

    here @Sing Sing for 10 cents/word tho with

    Good Behavior I “should” be out in Less Than 10 years

    or twenty thousand dollars.

    whichever comes first

    oh

    and

    BTW –

    how Do

    you Juggle all

    those ‘personalities’?

    they must keep

    you pretty

    Busy

    but

    like so

    Many have

    said here on

    Derr Schlogg*

    before me — you

    Seriously need some

    Professional fucking Help

    mayhaps

    we might

    All chip in?

    I’ll devote more

    of my valuable

    Time to your

    most likely

    hopeless

    cause

    nevertheless

    oh and say hello

    to thumpfer for

    me wouldja?

    *No

    wormmy

    I will Not

    do your re-

    search For you.

    yours &

    theirs comments

    History is Here for All to

    see. if they’ve the Stomach.

    the good lord knows I do Not:

    https://www.thestranger.com/users/2402388/tensor

    https://www.thestranger.com/users/76969210/tensorna

  19. @18: “…I still can’t understand why he thinks you and Tensor are the same person.”

    False accusations of sock-puppetry have a long and ignoble history here, sadly (see @31). This most recent round seems to have started with Libretto68 ‘discovering’ that “cressona” and “tensorna” end in exactly the same two letters (gasp!). So, I then explained how “tensorna” simply means, “tensor’s new account,” (you’ve correctly identified the latter as my original nym) but to no avail; Libretto68 could not possibly let a mere fact— and an unexcitingly pedestrian fact, at that! — simply deny him all glory from his magnificently insightful ‘discovery.’

    Once Libretto68 had established as ‘fact’ that cressona was really just my sock puppet, kristo’ could not possibly lag far behind, as something both that obviously unoriginal and tiresomely wrong could not possibly appear as anything other than fresh, new, exciting, and valid to a mind like kristo’s. So here we are, with kristo’ earnestly and smugly vouching for the ‘truth’ of something which is completely false.

  20. @29 & @30 kristofarian: Did Mayella Fool replace Babybarf, Valvoline, or both? Wow–the usual trolling gang of idiots must be getting desperate in their glut of anonymous MAGA stupidity.

    @37 kristofarian: I’m surprised ol’ tensy and Coolidge dollar haven’t already thrown their gloves off and gotten a room yet. They remind me of Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler in Anger Management.

    O, the batshit crazy! They’re fighting each OTHER now.

    JEEZUS WEPT! I hope the entire Felon Mu$k’s Mein Trumpf fascist nutzy regime is dead and gone before JD Vance ad nauseum can seize control of the White Trash House.

  21. perhaps

    you might

    stick with helping

    nutnyahoo with his

    Keep-the-Fuck-Outta

    Prison gambit thru your

    Pro-Genocide AIPAC-Backed

    Campaign? your insidious and

    never-ending Justifications’re an

    ENORMOUS HELP in Israel’s fucking

    GENOCIDE. oh, wait?

    we’re still two weeks away

    from an Official Designation?

    lots of Time

    for your Continued

    FUCKING JUSTIFICATIONS

    wormmy!

    better get

    busy.

    remember:

    it’s All Hamas’s Fault!

    Israels poor hands’re Tied!

    have a nice day!

    like Palestinians!

  22. @

    40’s

    for the

    Wormtongue

    if it isn’t fucking Obvious

    @38

    I could be

    Wrong, auntie Gee

    but wormmy’s

    fighting against

    Himself. the Overton

    Window’s too Overlapping

    in words

    tone &

    bile

  23. @38: In what sense do you believe me to be in a gloves-off conflict with Coolidge Dollar? Do you mean with cressona, who (again) threw unsupported accusations at me @32? I don’t see myself as having any intense conflict with either; we just don’t always see eye-to-eye, which hardly makes for any kind of disaster. (Doesn’t valuing diversity imply expecting a difference of opinions?)

  24. @41 kristofarian: Tensy’s speaking in voices now—like Norman Bates?? Yoiks!

    Too many MAGAs are ecstatically slurping the hydroxychloroquine these days.

    I guess time will tell if Tensy’s best friend is Felon Mu$k’s Mein Trumpf.

    @43: Take off the cheap wig and housedress, and get off the KKKool-Aid before

    your rabid brain turns to mush.

  25. @44: Um, I was just asking a question about what you wrote; no need to get nasty. I asked because I was, and am, genuinely curious about your statement @38: “I’m surprised ol’ tensy and Coolidge dollar haven’t already thrown their gloves off and gotten a room yet. They remind me of Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler in Anger Management.

    O, the batshit crazy! They’re fighting each OTHER now.”

    Why do you believe any of that is true?

Comments are closed.