Join our bible study, says rest of the country. There is no God here, Washington replies.
"Join our bible study," says rest of the country. "There is no God here," Washington replies. FatCamera

Secular Washington state: Forty-seven percent of adults in Washington say they aren't religious, the Seattle Times reports. That makes us the sixth least religious state in the country. The entire west coast is in the same league as Washington, with non-religious adults out-numbering religious ones. Only 28 percent of Washingtonians identified as highly religious.

I-5 closures start this weekend: The remodel of the northbound I-5 begins this weekend. From 9 p.m. Friday to 5 a.m. Monday there will only be two open lanes between the West Seattle Bridge and Olive Way.

Columbine’s 19th anniversary, the weed day, and Hitler’s birthday: You may be spending this day walking out to protest gun violence. Or, maybe you’re reading our Green Guide and blazing all day. Hopefully you’re not one the Neo-Nazis flocking to the small German town of Ostritz to celebrate Hitler’s birthday. The Sword and Shield Festival is the Coachella of far-right events; there will be speeches from far-right political leaders, a concert by right-wing rock bands, an MMA tournament, and more!

Escaped Atlantic salmon found 8 months later: A Cooke Aquaculture net-pen burst last summer and sent 300,000 Atlantic salmon into the native waters of Washington’s Pacific salmon. A tribal fisherman caught one of these salmon in the Skagit River on Tuesday, eight months later. It had eaten a fish. This is a sign that a subset of these Atlantic salmon can survive. Most have died off, unable to fend for themselves in the wild, tribal fisherman say, and don’t pose a threat to native salmon populations.

Is Scooter-share is the future? Shareable electric scooters are the newest transportation trend. They’ve cropped up in cities across the country, but they won’t be coming to Seattle until there’s a regulatory permit in place and until we figure out our bike-share program. San Francisco has an electric scooter epidemic; companies started operating illegally without permits and it’s been a whole thing.

AI will save the orcas: One of Microsoft’s new Artificial Intelligence projects is aimed at mitigating the extinction of the Puget Sound orcas, otherwise known as the Southern Resident Killer Whales. The software is aimed at collecting real-time data about individual whales’ health. Having a computer do identification and maintain records will free up scientists’ time and allow them to respond more quickly to threats facing these animals.

Comey’s coming to Seattle: He’s going to be speaking at Amazon headquarters. He’ll be discussing ethical leadership and his new book. Two things Trump hates are going to be in one place.

High drivers could feel the heat this 4/20: An “impaired driver emphasis patrol” will be conducted in southeast King County today. The patrol hopes to minimize the amount of 4/20 revelers from hitting the road while high. Though it’s hard to physically test if a person is driving while high, the legal limit for those 21 and over is five nanograms of THC per millimeter of blood.

Middle school marijuana dealer: A 12-year-old in Oregon allegedly duped some older kids into eating edibles. The student has been charged with three counts of marijuana delivery.

UW College Republicans assaulted with paint: Two officers for the club were tabling in front of the Husky Union Building when a woman threw paint on their booth and on them. They called the police and the woman was taken into custody. She was arrested on probable cause for assault in the fourth degree. That’s a misdemeanor and will likely result in a citation. One of the UWCR members hit by the paint intends to press assault charges.

Comey’s memos: The former FBI director’s written memos were released yesterday. Much of the information was already public, but the New York Times has a breakdown of the main takeaways.

Arizona teachers are striking: The walkout will start April 26. This is the most recent teacher strike to follow in the footsteps of Virginia teachers. Oklahoma, Kentucky, and Colorado have followed suit. Arizona teachers have the support of Arizona House Democrats.

Alex Jones is an idiot and a coward: Facing defamation charges, Jones is backtracking on one of his most fervently held conspiracy theories: that the Sandy Hook shooting didn’t happen. Jones has said in a YouTube video that, on second thought, the Sandy Hook shooting wasn’t staged and was a real event. The parents might not be crisis actors now, but Jones says they’re still being used by the Democratic Party and the news media.

Good times ahead: There’s a little bit of rain forecasted for tonight and Saturday. But, there’s clear skies and 70 degree temperatures on the horizon.

Fun fact for your Friday: The first e-commerce transaction was a drug deal. It was 1971. MIT students and Stanford students used ARPANET (precursor to the internet) accounts to buy some weed.

This weekend's best Seattle entertainment options include: A live taping of Stranger journalist duo Heidi Groover and Sydney Brownstone's podcast Trust Issues, the opening of MoPOP's Marvel: Universe of Superheroes exhibit, and the Tulip Festival Street Fair.