Vote for Hillary because she’s not a crazy fascist racist rapist* sexist pile of orangutan shit threatening to destroy our democracy.
We suspect that’s not good enough for some of our readers. So we’re going to lay it out for you, Ken Bone.
First, here is a noncomprehensive list of things that Hillary Clinton supports that both Donald Trump and Gary Johnson oppose. (Don’t even talk to us about Jill Stein.) Here we go: Expanding Obamacare so you don’t fucking die for lack of health insurance; raising the federal minimum wage so you can afford to pay your rent after you move to Cle Elum; cutting taxes for the middle class so you can maybe afford to have a family someday; regulating Wall Street so those assholes don’t wreck the US economy again; passing gun control laws so maybe you don’t die in a hail of stupid bullets; using government regulation to combat climate change so that maybe you don’t die in a flood or mega-hurricane; using government funding to support women’s reproductive rights so that women don’t have to go through crazy and dangerous hassles in order to make decisions about what goes on in their own uteruses; spending tax dollars to support green energy so that maybe we all actually have a breathable future; enforcing net neutrality so that you can stream your porn quickly and efficiently; and repealing Citizens United so that maybe we can start getting big money out of our messed-up democratic process.
