Twenty-four hours ago, I was sitting in a rickety wooden chair with a Cuban cigar, a glass full of tequila, and a view that looked like this.

tulum-8-1.jpg

Two hours ago, I was stumbling around downtown in a thin cotton shirt and thin sweater—stunned by the cold air and the stabbing, sideways light—trying to find a taxi and muttering regretfully about having come back.

Two minutes ago, I read my first press release in almost two weeks. And I fell in love with my job, my city, and the art of the press release all over again:

Comedy Benefit for sick boy and his pony

Local comedian Derek Sheen is hosting an all-star comedy benefit show on December 21st at Laughs in Kirkland for a young boy with cerebral palsy who is losing his prized pony.

The town of Caledon may force a three-year-old boy with cerebral palsy to give up his miniature pony after a neighbour complained about the smell.

Sam Spiteri’s grandfather gave him the pony, Emily, after he was diagnosed with spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy shortly after birth. The boy can’t walk or crawl, and Emily is part of his therapy regime.

“When we take him off the pony he cries. Even if he’s tired he doesn’t want to leave her,”

But at the end of July, the town notified the Spiteris the pony had to be removed due to the complaints. Sam’s physical therapist and pediatrician recommended equestrian riding because it triggers the core muscles that Sam needs to strengthen. It’s a newer form of therapy, and the closest location that offered reputable therapeutic equestrian riding was about 50 minutes away, Ms. Spiteri said.

Sam has seizures, so long car rides are difficult. When he was younger, Sam also had lung problems that left him prone to infections, she said.

The Spiteris will appear before the Caledon committee of adjustment Dec. 10 to ask for an exception because of Sam’s special circumstances. It costs $800 to appear before the committee. Ms. Spiteri said she received an e-mail from town council on Tuesday afternoon about an additional $345 required to circulate their application for an exception to the Toronto and Region Conservation Authority.

“I’m a single mom with two kids and I live at home with my parents. I have a child who is disabled and that takes its financial toll as well … the big issue for us is money. We will fight it until we run out of funds.”

All proceeds from the December 21st comedy show will go towards the Spiteri family legal costs and towards the cost of building a new stable for Emily. For more information on the Spiteri family, go to http://www.cbc.ca/health/story/2008/11/26/caledon-pony.html?ref=rss .

Scheduled to appear along with Sheen are Geoff Brousseau, Emmett Montgomery, Paul Merrill, and Travis Vogt.

For more info and advance tickets, go to http://www.laughscomedy.com/.

Laughs is located at 12099 124th Ave NE in Kirkland. Showtime is 7pm. Tickets are $10 at the door. For more info, call (425) 823-6306 or go to http://www.laughscomedy.com/

It’s all there: tragedy (the boy), pastoral (the horse), mystery (how’d these comedians get involved in this cause?), and farce (over $1,000 to appeal to a committee?!?).

For extra-special weirdness, here are the first two paragraphs from the Wikipedia entry about Caledon:

Caledon (2006 Population 57,050) is a town in the Regional Municipality of Peel in the Greater Toronto Area of Ontario, Canada.

In terms of land use, Caledon is somewhat urban, though it is primarily rural in nature. Many of Toronto’s wealthiest citizens own large country estates in the area, among them many members of the Eaton Family, Norman Jewison, Elton John and the inventors of the board game Trivial Pursuit.

This whole story sounds like a question out of Trivial Pursuit.

Brend an Kiley has worked as a child actor in New Orleans, as a member of the junior press corps at the 1988 Republican National Convention, and, for one happy April, as a bootlegger’s assistant in Nicaragua....

20 replies on “Press Release of My Year”

  2. You should keep up with BoingBoing. The city gave an exemption, so the kid gets to keep his pony, and the neighbors get to be viewed with justifiable disdain.

  6. @1: In a nice wood cabin at I-Can’t-Remember for a couple of days, then a little stick ‘n’ grass hut at Copal. With lots of riding around on a scooter to little towns nearby.

    But I’m glad to be back, stuffing Slog full of obsolete memes.

  9. #7–I believe that the various legal costs involved in security the right to keep the pony have left the family in question in a precarious position to actually be able to do so…

    …so, I believe the comedy show is to help them do just that.

    (I know that Paul Merrill trolls the Slog as often and as regularly as I do, perhaps he has more complete information on this.)

    –pgreyy

  10. Ah, Ontario.

    Armpit of Canada.

    (grin)

    No, seriously, I have fond memories of Borden, Ontario, and even the Toronto base.

    And, luckily, US dollars are worth something in Canada right now …

  11. Thanks for the heads up on the dollar Will. I hadn’t checked the currency converter in awhile. It is good to see the Canadian dollar where it should be, worth leas than the U.S. Dollar. Now I can buy stuff from Amazon.ca again.

  13. Why don’t they just have the people do a more thorough job of cleaning up after the horse? Which is probably all the neighbors wanted anyway.

  14. The benefit is still on! The family still has massive legal expenses and upkeep costs. Plus, we like ponies.

    As to how/why Seattle comedians got involved, blame Derek Sheen’s big, drunk heart.

    Thanks for all the comments (especially from the person(?) who called us “middling”–we’re moving up in the world!).

  17. Hi,
    Derek Sheen here.
    I was heartsunk when I first read this story on the CBC website, then again on Boing-Boing. Having grown up with a friend who suffered from Cerebal Palsey I
    remembered how excruciating the pain was for him and that, at the time, there was
    nothing but medication to help sedate him so he wouldn’t keep crying and screaming.
    I also remember his poor mother, who was young and single trying desperately to do everything in her power to make him feel as loved as possible. It was heartbreaking to watch my friends go through so much pain with no light at the end of the tunnel. So, that is the reason why I reached out to the Spiteri family and offered to try and do something to maybe ease the pain, if even a little. I have kept in contact with Antonia Spiteri and am well aware that the city council has allowed Emily to stay but it is not a permanent ruling. In order to keep the pony on the property Antonia has to build, or have built, a stable that meets all of the zoning requirements for the county to be satisfied in the case of further complaints. That costs money. Not to mention the legal costs. Antonia is a single mother living with her parents and two children, one of which has extreme special needs.
    It didn’t even occur to me that being Canadian would be an issue? They are still people that are in need and it’s Christmas for cryin’ out loud! Can’t fix everything, so why not just take it one thing at a time, right? I was so surprised at all of the comics who jumped up right away, when I made the initial call, and volunteered their time for this cause. This is an amazing community of very talented and caring people, and I can’t thank them enough.
    There, that’s what I have to say about it. See you Sunday?

  20. Articles in Toronto papers have noted that the ironic thing (if you want to call it that) is that Sam and his mother live surrounded by dairy farms, whose cows are just as smelly as the pony in question.

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