Kyle Regan—a masochistic Stranger reader—has vowed to do every single thing recommended by the Stranger Suggests (movies, galleries, bars, concerts) for the month of January. Look for his reports daily on Slog. —Eds.
I went into Xanadu without any idea of what it was about. Comments from friends ranged from “I loved the movie!” to “You mean that gay shit?” Ah, with friends like these…
My friend Kiyomi and I arrived at our seats next to Dan Savage and his boyfriend, Terry. Savage went onstage before the show began and gave a quick speech about the gay plot to ruin the sanctity of marriage. This was a benefit show for Equal Rights Washington, after all.
Xanadu was an experience. Cliffnotes: In 1980, lousy artist Sonny is inspired by Clio, a Greek muse. She falls in love with Sonny (breaking a divine taboo) and helps him open a venue where “all the arts” can live together under one roof (music, dancing, painting, making out): a roller disco.
Spandex, sparkles, and mirror balls twinkle and glimmer during the entire performance. A unicorn shitting Lisa Frank stickers would have been more masculine. Elizabeth Stanley’s hilariously bad Australian impression (a nod to Olivia Newton-John) was great. She sang, danced, and looked hot while rollerskating. What the hell can you do rollerskating?
As far as I could tell, the songs were close to, if not the same as, the movie’s numbers. Not a bad thing, considering how well the campy numbers went with the corny jokes and ridiculous plot. By the time the show ended, I felt like I’d huffed a small tub of glitter glue. The show was total eye-candy, and I’m pretty sure an auditorium of gay rights activists are fine with sparkles. Kiyomi and I enjoyed it thoroughly. The night made thousands of dollars for Equal Rights Washington, which was also pretty badass.
Since the night wasn’t flaming enough already, Kiyomi and I went to ERW’s after-party at Chapel, hosted by Dan Savage. I suck at mingling. Multiple Stranger staffers and random industry people came by my table to say hi, but I could only disappoint them with my lack of insight and education.
Don’t be so down on yourself…you probably make way more money than most of The Stranger staffers…and most of them were probably drunk and/or high and didn’t notice if you were shy.
But you are more talented then most of The Stranger writers so not to worry.
I am slowly falling in love with Kyle. May January never end.
Lack of insight and education? It sounds like you will fit in just fine with The Stranger staff.
The unicorn line just cracked me up for five solid minutes. Good job.
Kyle is great.Please keep him around after this experiment is over!
Mr. Regan, please have some more self-confidence! The constant “I`m so ignorant, so un-educated, so unfit to comment on this” theme in your posts is getting repetitive. Even if you do feel insecure, you don`t have to keep writing about it. That just reinforces your insecurity AND bores your audience.
i ain’t bored…
@7 Good point. He has been pretty humble all along but it is getting old. The reason why it is getting old is I don’t believe his bullshit anymore. He is a good writer and a astute observer of all kinds of things that are out of his comfort zone. I believed he might be unqualified in early January but now I am now convinced otherwise.
Intelligent people typically struggle with small talk and mingling. Don’t feel bad about it; remind yourself that you’re smarter than all those talkative freaks.
What industry were these industry people in? Journalism? Theater? Gay? Sparkle?
Dan, hire Kyle immediately. My thesis is that he is secretly angling for a gig. Check it out: despite his hick from the sticks pose, he’s, um, GGG, and if his writing doesn’t fit the Stranger’s editorial mission requirement of a distinctive POV which embeds direct personal observation with clearcut opinion, why, I’ll link to a video of Werner Herzong eating his shoe.
The dude is gold. I want more. He’s a bridge out of hipster exclusivism. You know who would be an awesome team of folks to deploy in shifts on items beyond stunt posting, books, and video? Paul Constant, Kelly O, and Kyle Regan. Really. Hire this guy and yoke him to Kelly and Paul. The four of you will save journalism.
“Since the night wasn’t flaming enough already, Kiyomi and I went to ERW’s after-party at Chapel, hosted by Dan Savage. I suck at mingling. Multiple Stranger staffers and random industry people came by my table to say hi, but I could only disappoint them with my lack of insight and education.”
STORY OF MY LIFE
Hahaha, NaFun. Totally.
Kyle, you have a writing style that is all your own.
sigh. I LOVE Xanadu the movie. it was life changing for me as a very young queer boy.
wish i could have been there.
Kyle,
Fess up, bud, did Dan put his arm around your shoulders, rub your inner thigh, fondle your nutsack, or say to you “You know, Kyle, you have a purdy mouth.” after the lights went down in the theatre or anytime during the show? If not, don’t expect your Slog contributions to continue after January because if Dan kept his hands to himself it means you ARE NOT a biscuit.
I’m with 7. These posts are entertaining and I hope Kyle stays around, but the sad sack Eeyore routine better end first. Nobody likes a Debby Downer.
I’ve found myself looking forward to Kyle’s posts every day! I hope he sticks around – he’s a breath of journalistic fresh air. Minus the self-deprecation.
Hey, everybody – lighten up. Kyle is just flexing a bit here, working up a style. Some of his stuff could actually be a bit “tongue-in-cheek” and the self-deprecation creates some truly funny lines.
Is it really him? We don’t know yet. The most extreme example ever – Andy Kaufman. It was very, very hard for me to watch him stand there and sweat and bang his bongo drum but I couldn’t look away. I also look forward to these little missives from Kyle, and don’t care if it’s really him or not.