I just attended the nauseating wedding of my 30-year-old niece to her boyfriend of several years. Both of them seem as gay as possible but they are diehard religious fanatics. I can list fifty signs these two are gay and once you point it out to someone who isn’t a bible thumper they go, “Yeah, that makes so much sense.” The bride’s father, who was also the minister, praised them for not moving in together before the wedding—another sign. I personally find hetero abstinence until age 30 to be highly suspicious. In fact, refraining from heterosexual intercourse until that age only seems realistic if someone is gay or asexual. Our extended families are all religious blowhards and we’re the only queer-friendly outlet in the family. I want badly to let the newlyweds know it’s OK to question the complexities of sexuality and that we’re here to support them. I fear they’ll live for decades in awkwardness because my niece’s minister father is beyond judgmental and insists love (and marriage) can only exist between one MAN and one WOMAN. Is there any tactful way to ask someone if they’re gay? Or to at least offer support if they are closeted? How do we let them know our little corner of the family will love and support them? I wish someone had asked me when I was trying to figure it out.
Union Not Concealing LGBTQ Energy