The ideal tool to facilitate a power wallow in the mud pit of romantic agony is music. Credit: KATI LACKER

The ideal tool to facilitate a power wallow in the mud pit of romantic agony is music.

The ideal tool to facilitate a power wallow in the mud pit of romantic agony is music. KATI LACKER

“Why waste your time worrying about it?” demands nearly everyone I have ever made the mistake of confiding in. “The past is past. Nothing you can do about it now.”

This little morsel of non-insight has been dispensed to me by friends, relatives, and relative strangers for lo these interminable years of what one can only laughingly call my adult life. The purported wisdom: Don’t fret over things you can’t control. To which I say: What the hell else are you supposed to fret about? The whole point of irrational anxiety is that it’s not rational.

There are plenty of real-world applications for irrational feelings of regret, remorse, and dread. But the all-time champion has always been romantic disappointment: things done to and by you, by and to people you loved exuberantly or insufficiently; ways you failed to express or conceal that love; terrible words spoken; perfect words unspoken; mistakes, missteps, misunderstandings; conversations too long delayed; steps too soon taken; habits pampered; work neglected; and, above all, the haunting awareness of having squandered a miraculous human synchronism and not being able to viscerally remember why it seemed so necessary to bail or to be bailed on.

Sean Nelson has worked at The Stranger on and off since 1996. He is currently Editor-at-Large. His past job titles included: Assistant Editor, Associate Editor, Film Editor, Copy Editor, Web Editor, Slog...