Strawberry Shartcake, Uh Oh, and Miss Texas 1988. Credit: Stanton Stephens

Strawberry Shartcake, Uh Oh, and Miss Texas 1988.

Strawberry Shartcake, Uh Oh, and Miss Texas 1988. Stanton Stephens

For our Valentine’s Day Issue, three local queens modeled ugly looks that inspired sexy times, and related stories of their individual misadventures, from dumpster munching, to pre-show sucking and fucking, to backseat banging. Read on…

Chase Burns is The Stranger's former editor. He's covered everything from gay luchadores to chemical weapons to Isabella Rossellini's favorite pets.