I spotted this portrait of a Native American in an antique store in Idaho…
…and I regret not purchasing it.
What I’ve posted above is just a detail; the full portrait is simply too vertical and way too staggeringly shatteringly awesomely amazing to post to Slog jumpless. You’re going to want to see the entire painting, Sloggers, but you’re gonna need a moment to brace yourselves before clicking through. Ready? Okay…
They wanted $450 for it. The HICBIA talked me out of it (“It’s not even framed, Dan.”) I will never forgive him.
AWWWWWWWWWW
Dan, I have a black velvet portrait of Elvis and Tom Jones singing together I will send you to make up for it.
I thought homosexuals had good taste. What a lie.
That reminds me, I need to rewatch the neverending story now that I’m not a 6 year old in daycare anymore and see if it makes any fucking sense.
That is one ugly fucking thing.
But, Dan, I understand your remorse. I regret to this day not purchacing an equally hideous chandelier that looked like two octopuses frozen in the act of mating, covered with randomly applied ceramic roses. Console yourself with the photograph, you have that at least. It is more than I have of my octopus-chandelier.
And kudos to Terry for his negotiating technique!
@53, it always made sense to me. But then, I wasn’t in day care when it came out.
Dog and Indian have exactly the same face!!!!
Clearly this is the most amazing thing ever. You should have bought it, put a really expensive frame on it and hung it somewhere strange, like, well, this would look strange anywhere, but I’m thinking a wall that someone sees directly after turning a corner. Hang it up, then count the number of “holy fucks!”
Dan, it’s not April 1st yet.
Oh man. I hope this is a delightful attempt at sarcasm and not a serious reflection of your taste. Mauvais goût, Dan!
Dude, he’s holding a miniature version of the dog from The Neverending Story!
Huh. Obviously a Lakota.
Do it Dan- You can afford $450. Your HICBIA can afford to lose one bit of wall space in exchange for a happy hubby.
I think it’s horrible. But then, I’m straight and wearing tweed as I write this, so what the fuck do I know.
It’s the worst painting I’ve seen for days. But if my wife wanted it, I’d frame it myself. A happy partner, a tacky painting…or better decor and a sulking spouse?
Easy call. I’d frame it for her, hang it where she likes, and then try not to look at it when having wild sex.
Luck
Doc
PS-If Terry buys this for you, it is your solemn marital responsibility to BLOW HIS MIND in bed at the nearest opportunity.
Why does that remind me of this?
re: 53. Amazingly, it DOES make sense…with a kind of twist. I remember not getting it as a kid, but I’ve seen it a couple times as an adult and I recommend watching it again.
I am totally with Dan on this. And had I seen it first, I would be without it, too, for the same reason.
THAT IS SO DANK!
What makes it brilliant is the recursively self-conscious commercialism that nevertheless mocks itself. The price tag in the upper left corner exists outside the frame, breaking the “fourth wall” as a commentary on the painting itself; the artist pointedly contradicts the idea that the author’s intention doesn’t matter, when the whole painting is about the author’s intent. Only the dog is looking at the the viewer. The person — is it even a girl or a boy? — is staring into space like a dress-up doll, not even a real person. Only the dog is real, and maybe the shapeless bright space behind the central figure–the blank space the artist invites our imagination to fill. But the rest of the painting articulates the artist’s own imagination of what we will see–their commentary on our own limitations.
Maybe that’s Atreyu’s dad holding a baby Falcor. Clearly, they need to make a Never Ending Story prequel.
@50 (Canuck)
::snickers::
Oh, I know. It’s really sad to see Dan saddled with a HICBIA whom he has to keep hidden away while in America (and can only allow Terry to see the light of day when in our more polite country, because we won’t point and stare at his … uh … [word deleted out of a sense of decorum]). Terry should have been so grateful, enough to buy TWO such paintings for his hubby. And, with two of them, they could have used one each as a makeshift toboggan to slide down the kiddy hills.
I love it, but I don’t love it $450 worth. That’s ridiculous.
And I know from bad art. Chez Vel-DuRay has quite an extensive art collection. The whole of it didn’t cost anything near $450, and it all came framed.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22404715@N0…
@67 Slomopomo wins the thread. Personally all I can say about it is “suicide-inducingly ugly”, but hey, I majored in the social sciences so what do I know.
52: Homosexuals do have good taste. The best proof of this is that homosexuals are camp. (And this is a splendidly camp painting.) For camp to happen you first must have good taste so that you can consciously toss it aside (and go for some bad taste on the down low as it were). People with bad taste are incapable of camp because for them it’s bad taste 24/7, with no reverberations.