Your favorite internet personalities magically jump off the computer screen and into real life this weekend as Stranger staff writer Jas Keimig and former editor Chase Burns present this series of films that you can’t find anywhere online (legally, at least).

Burns and Keimig have an encyclopedic knowledge of lost media. Through their Unstreamable column—now published on Scarecrow Video's blog—they've written more than 350 (!) blurbs and reviews about offbeat, forgotten, and otherwise unobtainable pieces of cinematic history. Now they’ll share some of their favorite unstreamable films on the big screen, starting with Bob Fosse’s 1979 hit All That Jazz.

It’s a crime that you can’t watch this movie online—this screening is going to be a rare treat. I mean, holy cow, look at this cast: Roy Scheider, Jessica Lange, Ann Reinking, Ben Vereen, John Lithgow, and Wallace Shawn, with Ethel Merman on the soundtrack. Gosh. Future titles include The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (making a real hard left on the tone, there), Cowboy Bebop: The Movie, and Drew Barrymore’s Poison Ivy from 1992.

Unstreamable's series at Northwest Film Forum starts with All That Jazz on September 10 and 11, and continues with through January.