28 years old, female, 59, 263 lbs. Credit: Kelly O
28 years old, female, 59, 263 lbs.
  • Kelly O
  • 28 years old, female, 5’9″, 263 lbs.

This is my body (over there—see it?). I have lived in this body my whole life. I have wanted to change this body my whole life. I have never wanted anything as much as I have wanted a new body. I am aware every day that other people find my body disgusting. I always thought that some day—when I finally stop failing—I will become smaller, and when I become smaller literally everything will get better (I’ve heard It Gets Better)! My life can begin! I will get the clothes that I want, the job that I want, the love that I want. It will be great! Think how great it will be to buy some pants or whatever at J. Crew. Oh, man. Pants. Instead, my body stays the same.

There is not a fat person on earth who hasn’t lived this way. Clearly this is a TERRIBLE WAY TO EXIST. Also, strangely enough, it did not cause me to become thin. So I do not believe any of it anymore, because fuck it very much.

This is my body. It is MINE. I am not ashamed of it in any way. In fact, I love everything about it. Men find it attractive. Clothes look awesome on it. My brain rides around in it all day and comes up with funny jokes. Also, I don’t have to justify its awesomeness/attractiveness/healthiness/usefulness to anyone, because it is MINE. Not yours.

I’m not going to spend a bunch of time blogging about fat acceptance here (but please read this), because other writers have already done it much more eloquently, thoroughly, and radically than I ever could. But I do feel obligated to try to explain what this all means.

You asked me for links, Dan, so here are some links for you. There are plenty more, but if you want me to go through each one and explain to you how these words and implications hurt and shame people, you’re going to have to pay me overtime (in Doritos!!!!!). I get that you think you’re actually helping people and society by contributing to the fucking Alp of shame that crushes every fat person every day of their lives—the same shame that makes it a radical act for me to post a picture of my body and tell you how much it weighs. But you’re not helping. Shame doesn’t work. Diets don’t work. Shame is a tool of oppression, not change.

Fat people already are ashamed. It’s taken care of. No further manpower needed on the shame front, thx. I am not concerned with whether or not fat people can change their bodies through self-discipline and “choices.” Pretty much all of them have tried already. A couple of them have succeeded. Whatever. My question is, what if they try and try and try and still fail? What if they are still fat? What if they are fat forever? What do you do with them then? Do you really want millions of teenage girls to feel like they’re trapped in unsightly lard prisons that are ruining their lives, and on top of that it’s because of their own moral failure, and on top of that they are ruining America with the terribly expensive diabetes that they don’t even have yet? You know what’s shameful? A complete lack of empathy.

And if you really claim to still be confused—”Nu uh! I never said anything u guyz srsly!”—there can be no misunderstanding shit like this:

I am thoroughly annoyed at having my tame statements of fact—being heavy is a health risk; rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly—characterized as “hate speech.”

Ha!

1. “Rolls of exposed flesh are unsightly” is in no way a “tame statement of fact.” It is not a fact at all—it is an incredibly cruel, subjective opinion that reinforces destructive, paternalistic, oppressive beauty ideals. I am not unsightly. No one deserves to be told that they’re unsightly. But this is what’s behind this entire thing—it’s not about “health,” it’s about “eeeewwwww.” You think fat people are icky. Eeeewww, a fat person might touch you on a plane. With their fat! Eeeeewww! Coincidentally, that’s the same feeling that drives anti-gay bigots, no matter what excuses they drum up about “family values” and, yes, “health.” It’s all “eeeewwwww.” And sorry, I reject your eeeeeewwww.

2. You are not concerned about my health. Because if you were concerned about my health, you would also be concerned about my mental health, which has spent the past 28 years being slowly eroded by statements like the above. Also, you don’t know anything about my health. You do happen to be the boss of me, but you are not the doctor of me. You have no idea what I eat, how much I exercise, what my blood pressure is, or whether or not I’m going to get diabetes. Not that any of that matters, because it is entirely none of your business.

3. “But but but my insurance premiums!!!” Bullshit. You live in a society with other people. I don’t have kids, but I pay taxes that fund schools. The idea that we can somehow escape affecting each other is deeply conservative. Barbarous, even. Is that really what you’re going for? Good old-fashioned American individualism? Please.

4. But most importantly: I reject this entire framework. I don’t give a shit what causes anyone’s fatness. It’s irrelevant and it’s none of my business. I am not making excuses, because I have nothing to excuse. I reject the notion that thinness is the goal, that thin = better—that I am an unfinished thing and that my life can really start when I lose weight. That then I will be a real person and have finally succeeded as a woman. I am not going to waste another second of my life thinking about this. I don’t want to have another fucking conversation with another fucking woman about what she’s eating or not eating or regrets eating or pretends to not regret eating to mask the regret. OOPS I JUST YAWNED TO DEATH.

If you really want change to happen, if you really want to “help” fat people, you need to understand that shaming an already-shamed population is, well, shameful. Do you know what happened as soon as I rejected all this shit and fell in unconditional luuuuurve with my entire body? I started losing weight. Immediately. WELL LA DEE FUCKING DA.

Eds. note: Dan Savage’s response is over here.

Lindy West was born an unremarkable female baby in Seattle, Washington. The former Stranger writer covered movies, movie stars, exclamation points, lady stuff, large frightening fish, and much, much more....

1,400 replies on “Hello, I Am Fat”

  1. @1190 How about this or this. It doesn’t matter on an individual basis (insofar as the bullshit use of shaming, ridicule, or even talking about individual circumstances) but there’s definitely a social as well as health, psychological consequence.

  3. There are already too many comments on this article to check if anyone has already said this, but…

    Lindy, you are not fat. I have no doubt that your size has bothered you over the years, but unless your photos here (http://www.thestranger.com/images/blogim…) and here (http://www.thestranger.com/imager/lindy-…) are very misleading, YOU ARE NOT FAT.

    Or at least not the type of fat that has real and severe health problems that Dan has talked about in the past.

  4. The article sort of treads the line, but ultimately it comes down enough on the side that “do what you want for your own reasons and stop worrying about other people” that I can get behind it.

    However, a theoretical responder saying “but it is a health issue!” would be correct. It is a health issue. Obviously, losing weight for your health is a good thing. But being fat is only a possible indication of health issues. Maybe someone is okay with being overweight but otherwise good. Maybe someone who is thin has serious non-weight related health problems. Blah blah blah. What matters is people’s intentions: both your own, and the people advising you. But Lindy is right, shaming is stupid.

    I’m follow a tumblr blog called curvesappeal and I can’t fathom why nearly any of the girls featured on there ever had any body issues.

  5. Great post. Funny how people feel like their preference for the cultural media-pushed weight standard is not just an opinion, worth exactly their opinion on McDonald’s vs. Wendy’s French fries, but actually has some sort of credence and should be pushed onto other people.

    Also, I find it incredibly ironic that the most judgmentally outspoken people are the ones who actually DO have an easy time losing weight and ASSume that because their body works that way, so does everyone else’s.

    Um, no. I am, incidentally, close enough to the stereotypical “good” weight to pass. And I will never, ever tell someone it’s simple or easy to lose weight, because if your body works like mine, it’s not. I’m happy for everyone whose body follows the calories in/calories out logic. Must be nice to be you. And STFU because for a lot of people, it really doesn’t work that way, and your judgments make me want to stay away from you. I’ve spent enough years believing that if I just did what you said I’d be good enough…it was bullshit.

  6. @1209 dirac

    Good links. I do think that sharing individual experiences is helpful, in that it fills in where the facts leave off. It does help sharing our stories, along with the scientific and sociological information. Don’t you think?

  7. Comments were already at 900+ when I first saw this post, so I haven’t bothered commenting for now, but thanks, Lindy. You are awesome. Don’t ever change.

  8. I’m a big fan of what Dan does for the gay community, but it has always set my teeth on edge when you can feel his venom toward fat people come through in his writing, even when he’s trying to be “helpful.”

    It also tickles me pink that Marilyn Wann commented! Her book, Fat!So? changed my life.

    I am a person who has a genetic predisposition toward being a big girl. I’ve never been tiny. When I took 7 dance classes a week, I was still chubby. When I was a cheerleader and a dance teacher, I was still chubby. I was not an overeater and I worked my ass off and I was still chubby.

    I have battled my weight my entire life, but I finally learned to accept that I’ll never be skinny. And I honestly think I look weird when I’m under 180. Right now, I’m around 195, My cholesteral and blood pressure are perfect and I rock my curves. I’ve never had a problem with men turning down their noses at my curvey figure. I’ve dated men who, some shallow people would wonder “Why is he dating that chubby girl?” Why? Because I rock, and I’m fortunate enough to have self confidence despite what fatphobes think about me.

    I move, I dance, I excercise, and when I want pie, I have some damn pie.

    Lindy, you are gorgeous, hilarious, wicked smart and an amazing writer and I have long been a fan of your work. This just solidifies my total girlcrush on you. You tell ’em, girl.

  10. The article sort of treads the line, but ultimately it comes down enough on the side that “do what you want for your own reasons and stop worrying about other people” that I can get behind it.

    However, a theoretical responder saying “but it is a health issue!” would be correct. It is a health issue. Obviously, losing weight for your health is a good thing. But being fat is only a possible indication of health issues. Maybe someone is okay with being overweight but otherwise good. Maybe someone who is thin has serious non-weight related health problems. Blah blah blah. What matters is people’s intentions: both your own, and the people advising you. But Lindy is right, shaming is stupid.

    I’m follow a tumblr blog called curvesappeal and I can’t fathom why nearly any of the girls featured on there ever had any body issues.

  11. Dear Lindy,
    I was in internet love with you before I ever saw you, but now you should know you 110% fit the profile of “lady I would like to marry.” If I lived in Seattle I would totally stalk you. Why are men so afraid of women’s bodies? As a raging homo, I find myself more tolerant to other people who have taken shit from everybody else their whole lives. I’d think of all people, Dan would understand what it is like to live that way.

    Please have gay sex with me (I promise it will be good,)
    – Beth

    P.S. Fuck J Crew and their tiny pants.

  12. Seriously Lindy, if you just cut carbs and do whatever works for my specific genetic make up, you will be have a socially acceptable body and be attractive to men. And I can just ignore your entire post and continue to pretend that that’s the only thing that matters and any protestations are consent to fat shame you because no one, esp women, are allowed to ever not care about what other people think of their body.

  13. @1217 If you can’t get the difference between what Lindy was doing in that piece and what Dan does regularly, there’s really no use arguing this with you.

  15. @1210

    Except the picture you’re linking to isn’t a picture of carbs. The burger bun is a carb. But the burger itself is meat/protein, the cheese is dairy, the bacon is also meat/protein… So are you saying if she ate everything else but the bun you’d stop judging what she chooses to put in her mouth? Or did you actually mean the entire thing, in which case you should specify besides just “stop eating carbs.”

    And YEAH, I’m being intentionally dense to demonstrate how stupidly simplistic your attitude on nutrition is.

  18. @1214 Sure. I am sorry if I came off as disparaging. There’s plenty of dimensions to this issue and it’s VERY complex–note that the links I gave you have a conclusion and a rebuttal using similar methodology.

  20. good vagina @ 1128, Amen. I had the same thought as your post expresses, just before I read it. Thanks for expressing it so eloquently.

    To add to 1188 above: It’s about how you and others consistantly miss the point: That fat people are tired of being society’s punching bags for the perceived shortcomings of their body shape. The only thing you need do is understand that point to the best of your ability, because (as with gay people, old people, disabled people, etc, etc) the problem (addressed in Lindy’s blog post) is not in the physical actuality of a person’s body, but in a society full of people’s attitude toward that attribute and the group of people who are perceived to share it. You, and the other million people in these comments missing the point, are addressing a completely different problem; that of the effect of obesity on health.
    You are free to have all the opinions you want, but unsolicited advice is rarely appreciated (including this piece, no doubt).

  21. @1228 Cynic Romantic

    I’ve left many comments here, many in response to what others were saying…so one comment seen by itself can be horribly taken out of context.

    First of all, I began posting on this article because of Lindy’s words, specifically the fact that she doesn’t care what causes fatness and doesn’t seem to see it as a problem at all. (Though some have commented that her strong emotion displayed throughout the article shows that she really does have a problem with her weight. If she didn’t she wouldn’t be so fightin’ mad.) I then commented in response to what others were saying. So many people, on both sides of the argument, are raising excellent points. Many of us are sharing personal stories. I think it helps. I also think it’s best we all try to treat each other with respect.

  22. @1206, you’re right, “cherry picking” isn’t the issue. Except that it sort of is – to me, posting those specific columns seems to be his defense…here are examples of me being sorta supportive, so therefore you can’t say I’m sometimes derisive…which is bullshit. I don’t think Lindy would deny cherry picking her examples either…I just think in his case, it’s not a valid defense, whereas in her case, it absolutely is the way to support her statements. (Examples of him being derisive prove that he’s sometimes derisive, whereas examples of him supporting fat people only prove that sometimes he supports fat people…they don’t at all show that he often is not doing so.)

    And that posting closed-comment collections of these columns is pretty immature. How is that “leaving it alone” to do that? It seems defensive and nothing more…the point to him seems to be, don’t be mean to Savage (not, oh, maybe see that he’s been making hurtful statements and actually examine his own actions…Lindy linked specific examples, so if he’s not going to address those examples, I’m not sure what he gains by responding at all right now).

  23. you all think Savage is really going to jump into a cage full of 1228 tigers (and counting)? the minute he dangles a toe into this thread you’ll all chew it off. no matter what he says.

  24. Maybe you don’t want comments, Dan, but you’re going to get them anyway:

    I bet that you’re feeling a little stunned by Lindy’s post and by the outpouring of support for her (coupled with the accusations of bullying being directed at you).

    It’s my belief that the reason so many people are challenging/accusing you now is that your role in the world has changed so much recently. A few years ago, you were essentially an entertainer, and like Simon Cowell, being a bit of an asshole was part of your schtick.

    But now, with all your media presence regarding the gay marriage debate, and especially with the creation of the It Gets Better Project. you’ve become so much more than that. Whether you intended this or not, you are now the most prominent public face of the LGBT rights movement. This is a great power, and you have the intelligence, creativity, and persistence to wield this power.

    But there’s a downside for you personally. Being a famous leader in a controversial movement puts you under the microscope – there is going to be a lot more attention paid to your words and actions (both present and past). Any indications of hypocrisy or bullying on your part are going to be noticed and remembered more than they ever were before.

    The other downside is that you’re stuck with the responsibility of representing the LGBT community – so when you do or say something sketchy, it reflects on the rest of the community. When you, our mouthpiece, say something intolerant, the foes of gay rights will use it to attack all gay people.

    For example, let’s say that you have occasion to go head to head with Sarah Palin in a TV interview or something. Sure – you’re smart and articulate and funny enough to debate circles around her (not to mention having facts and reason on your side…). But, she’s raising a child with Down syndrome, and you’re on record as calling people with Down syndrome “tards” then ignoring the people who call you on it. Do you really think Palin’s supporters aren’t going to be able to dig that up, or that they’re going to put in the context of non-hateful things you’ve said over the years? And do you really think you’re going to have the moral high ground? Or, are people just going to draw the conclusion that gays are intolerant, and only care about bullying when the victims are gay?

    It’s not exactly fair that you have to shoulder the responsibility of being examined so closely or having to be a role model … but it’s a reality, the price of being famous. If you choose to embrace your destiny as king of the gays, you owe it to the rest of us to watch your words and apologize when you should. Otherwise, you’re hurting our position in the world, rather than helping it.

    So: stop bullying fat people, and don’t tell me you haven’t – both the outright namecalling (“LARDASS”) and the dog whistles (“Ban fat marriage”) are on the internet, and posting non-hateful columns doesn’t make the hateful ones go away. Stop calling people tards, retarded, or leotarded. Stop insulting women you don’t like by calling them cunts, and stop insulting men you don’t like by calling them transexual. And, apologize to the people you’ve insulted. It won’t make you lose face, it’ll make you look like somebody big enough to admit and grow from his mistakes. And it will make you a more powerful advocate for gay rights.

  25. @1228 So, your solution to stopping the cycle of treating a class of people with hate is to call someone a “dopy pint” (amongst a million others) on a comment thread?

  26. @1229

    Lindy does not care about her weight, but does care how people treat her/react to her/judge her based around it. I explain it as, if you stuck her on a desert island, she would probably never consider her weight. She defines herself in other ways, thus where she gets the “I don’t care” attitude. However, stick her back in society, and suddenly people react to her in a certain way based on something she herself doesn’t even think about (Like if people suddenly started being really mean to you cause you have long toes. You don’t define yourself by your large toes, and after a while you’d probably start feeling kind of defensive/upset that people are defining you by such a strange arbitrary physical thing.) She cares about THAT, about the attitudes and misunderstanding surrounding her weight.

    I don’t think these two emotions cancel each other out. We can have complex emotions, especially when it comes to weight.

  27. Let’s cut the shit — “health” has nothing to do with it. This society deems fat people unattractive, and calling someone “fat” is like calling them ugly. Actually, it’s worse, because being ugly could just be the result of losing the genetic lottery, while being fat is something that you did to yourself, and how dare you let yourself go like that? It’s not just about aesthetics, it’s about moral failure. And it’s particularly bad for a woman to get fat, because we are still the ornaments of society, and required to make everyone’s landscape as pretty as possible. How dare we not stay within acceptable ranges to make dicks hard!

  29. Here’s another anecdotal example for you, not to be generalized in any way, and to only be applied to my own individual case, okay? I am overweight, and ashamed, and yet I feel no judgment towards anyone dealing with weight issues. I really don’t, so please do me a favor and believe me. And yet I hate my own body, and find it unpleasant to look at and be in. Is it because I internalized some kind of silly size 0 ideal? hell no. I want to be a size 10, or an 8, as I was three years ago. I felt great then, I don’t feel good now.

    Here’s why I hate my body: I can’t run as far and as fast as I did when I was not carrying extra weight. I pop out of my clothes. I have less sexual desire. I feel less attractive. I already feel accused of not “loving myself” enough or accepting myself as I am. I don’t, and I can’t, because my stomach roll makes my stomach turn.

    I want to be healthy, and athletic. I also like being desired and thought of as attractive. It’s not the primary driver of my existence (that would be my job and love for my husband). But I also want to be attractive again.

    I’m 20-30 lbs overweight and it’s exclusively my fault. I do have Hashimoto’s thyroid (hypo), which in theory makes it difficult for me to lose weight, but I take a hormone for it and keep it under control.

    So here’s the grand explanation for my fatness: I overeat. I eat 3500 calories on some days. Sometimes more.

    When I go down to 2000-2500 calories a day, I lose weight. That’s plenty of food for most humans, but I crave more. So I can’t keep up the progress I make, and I hate myself for it; I don’t judge anyone else, I just judge myself.

    I wanted to add my experience to this thread, to alert some of you to cases like mine for which the only explanation is overeating, coupled with not exercising. Like those overweight people here who eat 1500 calories and can’t lose weight, my experience matters too: I eat too much, and I hate myself for it, while, shockingly, not having any judgment at all for other overweight or obese people. This attitude exists, and now you know.

  30. I like @1232 saying Dan is a role model, like it or not, and that his quick witty and sarcastic slog posts will be mined for nuggets to be taken out of context and used against issues dear to his heart (and my heart, too). But, I don’t want him to change – just be yourself, Dan and that is good enough.

    Remember that tennis match that went on for, like, days? Surrrr-eal! This ls like looking at one of those weird GIFs that, if you stare at it long enough, you think it will jump the groove and come to an end, but it never does and you can’t stop starring…..

  31. littlesparrow @1229: Firstly, let me appologise unreservedly for calling you a “dopy bint”. That was completely uncalled for, out of line, and mean, and I am very sorry I said it.

    To me, the article reflects Lindy’s absolutely emotional overload (for want of a more accurate term) from 28 years of abuse from other people regarding the size and shape of her body. It is that verbal and emotional abuse, and the associated presumption that accompanies it, which she is rejecting, not the medical risk of obesity per se. These are excellent points, but they are almost completely irrelevant to the point of the article (IMO).

    Also, I don’t think Dan should take this thread too personally. There is obviously a lot of pent up resentment and emotion being expressed here, and the fact that his posts triggered it does not make him responsible for the conditions that created it.

  32. @1235

    Actually, all the length of this comments section is that fat people like to whine a lot.

    And Lindy isn’t fat. She’s a cube. Her BMI is over 38. She’s past fat and well into obese.

    To deny that there are serious health consequences from that is crazy. I don’t care about the insurance costs. I know that obese people die early, and help keep Social Security solvent.

  33. Medeii,

    Thank you again for yet another unsolicited opinion. Will you do me the favor of restraining your unsolicited opinions, your criticisms, your proclamations of the supposed mass hurt I have caused, your demand that I negotiate the meaning of everything I say, your accusations that I’m attempting to defend any person, or justify any persons words and/or behavior? Because, I’m not. And, the fact that I have told you numerous times that I am not defending Savage or anyone else, should have been sufficient. I find your insistence that you are better qualified to understand what I’m saying or thinking very hurtful. Kindly keep in mind are not my judge nor are you my editor. I have never asked for your opinion or criticism, you have decided to nominate yourself for the job. Please, kindly keep in mind that I have as much right as you do to ask questions or state opinions on any thread. I am not obligated to negotiate the meanings of anything I post with you, either. Kindly keep in mind that your opinions are not facts, too.

    There are more than enough individuals who are honestly seeking to cause hurt feelings on this thread, try hounding one of them. Honestly, I’ve had enough and truthfully you are starting to remind me of bully who used a lot of nice sounding words before beating the crap out of me. I was never good enough for that person, and you have successfully convinced me that I can’t say anything to please you. Thus, I think it best if you just refrain from attempting to ‘correct’ anything about me and I’ll vacate this thread.

    And, I’m truly sorry for your hurt feelings on this thread. I’m sorry that my comments seem to have added to your hurt feelings. Which is the only reason I’ve come up with as to why you keep hounding me. (Perhaps, if I was well I could come up with a more creative reason to your liking?) I never seek to hurt people’s feelings and I’m more than happy to apologize when they tell me that I have hurt them. So I am sorry. I hope you find healing and peace.

  34. Not one comment from Lindy, here or on Slog, all day. Only posts from Dan are in response to this. Only 30 posts total from others all day on Slog. Seems like things are kind of tense. I miss Dan.

  36. @ Littlesparrow7

    I created an account just to let you know that you are awesome. This is one of the very few times that I’ve ever come away from a comments section with a positive experience. There’s nothing like a reasoned, fact-based discourse. Cheers.

  37. Wow. Now Dan is the “King of the Gays”(?!) and should only issue politically correct directives, and should apologize retroactively for ever insulting anyone? So, I guess DTMFA is off the table from now on?

  38. Lindy West should run for office. Something like AWESOME GODDESS OF THE ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSE!!

    Love you, Lindy and love this article. Sent it to my teenage daughter. Well said.

    Now – please pose nude. Pretty please?

  39. It seems to me that the shaming you are experiencing or social oppression isn’t all that harsh. You are a morbidly obese person that publicly and enthusiastically describes eating meals fit for a normal family of four.

    If I had my way, you’d have a horn blaring in your ear all day:

    “DROP THE DOUGHNUT FATTIE”
    “PASS ON THE TWENTY OUNCE PORTERHOUSE YOU FUCKING BLOB”

    You are disgusting and the most UNATTRACTIVE part of you is your personality.

    I’d rate your body a 1.5 and your personality a 1.

    EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

  40. Why is Dan Savage the enemy? Why not the totally effed Western food production system that makes it cheaper and easier to eat crap? Why not the companies that are subsidized by our tax dollars to put empty calories, salt, and fat into processed junk foods that are marketed to kids the same way cigarettes were in the past? Being concerned about the obesity epidemic does not make someone a fat-hating bigot. It IS being empathetic and compassionate and I can’t see how anyone functioning in today’s society with half a brain would not be concerned about it.

    I think the way you turn obesity purely into an emotional, personal issue is ridiculous, and clearly does nothing to solve the problem. It is a political issue, and the 30% (or is it now 40, or 50 percent?) of obese Americans are being had by corporations who want to addict them, and bleed them of their money and their sense of having the choice and the will to change the way they eat. It is misguided and absurd to direct your anger over our society’s really complicated, destructive relationship with food onto DS.

  41. Why is Dan Savage the enemy? Why not the totally effed Western food production system that makes it cheaper and easier to eat crap? Why not the companies that are subsidized by our tax dollars to put empty calories, salt, and fat into processed junk foods that are marketed to kids the same way cigarettes were in the past? Being concerned about the obesity epidemic does not make someone a fat-hating bigot. It IS being empathetic and compassionate and I can’t see how anyone functioning in today’s society with half a brain would not be concerned about it.

    I think the way you turn obesity purely into an emotional, personal issue is ridiculous, and clearly does nothing to solve the problem. It is a political issue, and the 30% (or is it now 40, or 50 percent?) of obese Americans are being had by corporations who want to addict them, and bleed them of their money and their sense of having the choice and the will to change the way they eat. It is misguided and absurd to direct your anger over our society’s really complicated, destructive relationship with food onto DS.

  43. @1244 joshk

    Awww thanks, that’s so sweet! Sometimes it felt like no one was really reading anything, so that means a lot! You made my effort at keeping up with this thread and writing responses like a crazy person (while sick at home with a really bad cold) worth every second. 🙂

    Cheers!

  46. First of all, I loved Lindy’s post, because it was clever and addressed the effects of shaming and the way that most people act like they know all about the health status of an overweight person and what that person should do fix emself, simply by looking at em. However, I’ve read a great many of these comments, and I think that this thread is missing a really important point.

    Lindy’s post is as much about gender as it as about fatness, and no-one, including Lindy and Dan, seem to acknowledge or address this. I think it was brave and brilliant of Lindy to post her picture and her weight, but not because she’s fat: because she’s female. In this culture, women are expected to be physically attractive to guys and to be skinny (and dress femininely, which Lindy clearly does), in order to be worthwhile. In other words, Lindy’s shame came from how this society treats women more than from how this society treats fat people.

    Yes, this society needs to be more compassionate to overweight people, and we need to emphasize healthy eating and exercise more than appearance, but the soul-crushing expectations that Lindy is so excellently refuting are, in fact, more about gender expectation than about weight.

  47. Dear Ms. West,
    Over the years of you being at the Stranger I have tried my damnedest to stay away from anything that has been written by you. For the most obvious of reasons really, you are a crap writer.
    I have heard from my various acquaintances in the whole of Seattle who have told that there is this article by someone that was posted on the SLOG that, supposedly, was, well, in their words, ‘Awesome!’ Finally after many confrontations of people asking me to if I’ve read that ‘Awesome!’ article I finally have broken down and read it.
    It’s crap!
    I’m not going to sugarcoat this for you darling, or the little druggie friends who have helped you up to this pinnacle, because this is a very defining and true statement coming from me.
    I don’t care. About you. Your fat. Or the size of whatever burger you are about to eat! Really. Seriously.
    Honestly, I was anorexic as a kid, I hit thirty and I gain weight rapidly enough that I was put at an extremely bad health risk. Since that time I’ve lost weight and still struggle to lose even more to stay healthy. But, sorry, unlike some that will remain unnamed I do not flit about proclaiming how angry I am over how others are ridiculing me about it. Nor do I see myself in any contextual sense trying to provoke an outrageous fight with another staff member where I work…please, that’s just suicide.
    While we are on the subject, because I’m being so honest and all, I’ve been sitting back quietly and watching your meteoric career with disgust while those around you flounder at the Stranger. True the Stranger isn’t what I would call the most stellar piece of journalistic integrity in the whole of the U.S. but I would like to think that it would have enough integrity at some editorial level to recognize the plagiarism involved with your work.
    Oh, by the way, before you go off on whatever conniving little cover up you would have about how you didn’t know you sounded like others staff members, please keep in mind that I have been reading the Stranger a hell of a lot longer than you and I do recognize the various amounts of verbiage and sayings you’ve lifted over the years from said staff members.
    You are a plagiarist. And not a very smart one at that.
    AND, I am NOT the only one who sees it. So, you keep on telling yourself, and others, that you are an original. (I’ve read what you call ‘original’, you don’t have an original voice and only started getting noticed when you began lifting work from other Stranger staff!) It all comes back to you being a crap writer.
    In closing Ms. West. You are a fat plagiarist with very little integrity other than being able to drink enough alcohol to look cool in the eyes of those who pay you.
    BITE ME!

  48. Lindy,

    Seriosly hon.

    You are LOVED.

    Not just by douchebag “fanboys” like me, but by thouands (if not hundreds of thousands who haven’t yet had the pleasure of the introduction to your intellect AND beauty) who have yet to appreciate you.

    Dan S. isa righteous target – but just a symbol. Reading his response – he doesn’t get it yet. Buthe will (God wiling).

    Lindy – keep it up sweetie. You are loved, and you are RIGHT.

    And you are BEAUTIFUL.

    Damn.

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