The Hunger Games of Housing

Slog PM: Uvalde Victim's Husband Dies of Heart Attack, Seattle Is Losing People, The Actor Who Played Paul Schell in a Major Motion Picture Is Dead

Cant get out of this city fast enough.
"Can't get out of this city fast enough." Charles Mudede

There is no such as killing one person. A person is not an individual. A person is always a point (monad) where social lines originating from others meet. This is why when you kill a person, you also kill a part of them that's in these others. The closer one is to the death, the larger this lost part is. Indeed, the size and growth of such a loss can have the power to consume the life of the other. And so it is with Joe Garcia, the husband of Irma Garcia, "one of the two teachers killed in the massacre at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas." According to Joe Garcia's nephew, after his uncle "visited his wife’s memorial on Thursday morning to drop off flowers," he came back home, “pretty much just fell over,” and died of a massive heart attack. The loss of hope in him was that massive.

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This Week in Seattle Event News: Ozuna, Marc Broussard, and More

An impressive feat: All five of Ozunas albums have topped Billboards Top Latin Albums chart.
An impressive feat: All five of Ozuna's albums have topped Billboard's Top Latin Albums chart.
Latin-trap sensation Ozuna will get the whole city dancing during his Ozutochi tour, which is based around his upcoming album of the same name. If you’re looking for something more mellow, “bayou soul" songsmith Marc Broussard will also stop by this fall. Seoul-based collective DPR is bringing their “Dream Perfect Regime” stateside. Plus, “funny Asian dudeJimmy O. Yang will pause his movie career for new dates on his Tiger Son comedy tour. Read on for details on those and other newly announced events, plus some news you can use.

ON SALE FRIDAY, MAY 27


MUSIC

Bush Tetras
Madame Lou’s (Fri Sept 2)

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Pleasure Is Boogie Nights for Gen Z

Boogie Nightss pool scene and its reference to that commie flick I Am Cuba... thats not me.
"Boogie Nights's pool scene and its reference to that commie flick I Am Cuba... that's not me." Courtesy of Sundance Film Festival



This review originally ran in 2021 as part of our Sundance coverage. We're re-upping it in honor of the film showing at Grand Illusion from May 27 to June 2.

How has cinema's perspective on the porn industry changed since the Gen X masterpiece Boogie Nights, which was completed in 1997 but set in the 1970s? According to Pleasure, a film written-directed by Ninja Thyberg, a Swede, and set in the capital of US porn, LA: a lot and not so much. Let's begin with the former.

In our day, a person with big porn dreams, such as those maintained by the main character of Pleasure, Bella Cherry (Sofia Kappel), must amass a large following on social media. That means posting dirty selfies on the regular. The movers and shakers of porn will not take you seriously unless you show them the number of likes and eyeballs on your profile. (Please forgive the smutty pun in that sentence, but as the Human League once sang: "I'm only human.") This is the first important lesson that Pleasure's star, Bella Cherry, who moves to Los Angeles from rural Sweden with nothing but what can only be described as Blond Ambition, learns when she attempts to make the fantastic leap from the massive bottom of the porn heap to its tiny top.

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You Are Cordially Invited to Poke a Snail

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When the tide rolls out is when ~secrets~ are revealed! So mosey on down to the seashore to meet a Seattle Aquarium Beach Naturalist who will show you where to glimpse the best damp treasures: Weird snails, upside-down barnacles, slimy seaweed, and so on. An entire world of alien life forms are yours for the discovering — no appointment necessary, all ages welcome.

Rather than picking them up, remember to poke the sea life gently, with one wet finger. And never take anything home with you, unless it’s the shed skin of a seal folk who climbed up on shore to temporarily assume human form. (And even then, it seems like it would be polite to ask first.)

Low Tide Beach Walks run through August, but don’t let this become one of those “I’ll get around to it later” excursions — the way this planet is going, who knows how much longer oceanic life will be around.

Meet Us at the Beach: Low Tide Beach Walks take place around the middle of each month from June through August at nearly a dozen local beaches. Check the schedule for locations and low-tide times. The first round will take place May 29 (10am to noon) and 30 (10:30 am to 12:30 pm).


NewsCityCrimeCops

I Want to Live in a Society That Doesn’t Need Community Court

There is a court inside this court that tries to break the cycle of poverty, rather than perpetuate it with jail.
There is a court inside this court that treats people like people instead of caged animals. WC

Rarely do government bureaucrats admit that they hope to work themselves out of a job. But when I interviewed Judge Damon Shadid after he ran through a full Community Court docket last week, that was his core message.

He didn’t mince words after slogging through more than thirty cases of misdemeanor trespass, shoplifting, and other minor offenses that morning: “If an adequate social safety net existed, most of these crimes would not happen,” he said. Instead, in Seattle, the people who fall through the gaps in our social safety net and then commit minor crimes of survival wind up in Community Court.

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Councilmember Andrew Lewis Guts His Own Policy, Excluding Thousands of App-Based Workers from a Minimum Wage

App-based worker call Lewiss self-own a betrayal.
App-based workers call Lewis's self-own a "betrayal." Lester Black

After meeting with app-based workers for nearly a year to craft a new policy designed to make huge corporations such as Doordash, UberEats, and Rover pay their workers minimum wage, the bill’s cosponsor, Councilmember Andrew Lewis, cast the deciding vote to reduce the scope of the legislation, excluding thousands of workers. With that vote he joined Councilmember Alex Pedersen and Sara Nelson, the council’s corporate bloc.

“I expect this from Nelson and Pedersen, but from Lewis, who cosponsored the bill, this is really disappointing… It’s weird, it’s confusing, it’s a betrayal,” said Magnolia Klee, who finds cleaning work on TaskRabbit, and who now counts herself among the thousands the committee denied a mandated minimum wage.

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Slog AM: We Live in an Absolute Failed State, The Democrats Baby Republicans on Gun Control Bills, and Seattle Honors Several Tragedies

Chuck, for the love of god, do something.
Chuck, for the love of god, do something. ONNES / GETTY IMAGES

What’s a Democrat to do? You know those losers we elect to keep our country running? After this latest tragedy, the Democrats, despite their current power in U.S. Congress, can’t pass so much as a background check bill, which is so milquetoast that recent polling shows 90% of Americans would approve. So the U.S. Democrats, the party of Hold Them Accountable and Vote Blue No Matter Who, decided to take a pause on gun control votes with the hope that in the next 10 days they can hash out some sort of compromise.

The Democrats don’t seem hopeful about reaching a compromise. Any Republican who even so much as looks at the Second Amendment funny feels like the voters will take away their cushy job. Good to know these fuckers' job security is more important than at least pretending to do something to stop gun violence.

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Slog PM: The Govs Got COVID, New Dominant Omicron Variant Dropped, Updates on the Latest School Massacre

Get well soon, king.
Get well soon, king. Lester Black

Governor Jay Inslee and Lt. Gov. Denny Heck test positive for COVID-19: I wanted to make a joke about those govern together getting COVID together, but The Seattle Times reports that the state's #1 and #2 leaders had not been cavorting together "in recent days." Otherwise, they're both doing fine (within reason) for now, they're both getting that Paxlovid, and they both encourage everyone to get vaccinated and boosted. It's saving their lives right now.

I wonder if they got the new omicron subvariant? We're calling it BA. 2.12.1, and it's spreading so fast it "made up about 58% of all new U.S. cases" by the end of last week, according to the New York Times. Though it's faster than the others, as of right now there's no evidence that it's more deadly. I wonder how many SARS infections our bodies can withstand over a short period of time without major longterm damage? One a year? Two a year? Six a year?

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Where to Find Food & Drink Specials in Seattle for Memorial Day 2022

Snohomish Pie Co. is serving up raspberry cream pie and chocolate cream pie for Memorial Day weekend.
Snohomish Pie Co. is serving up raspberry cream pie and chocolate cream pie for Memorial Day weekend. Snohomish Pie Co.

From a special prix-fixe meal from Southern chef John Hall at Finistère in Port Townsend, to exclusive pies from Snohomish Pie Co., we've got you covered with plenty of Memorial Day specials. Read on to find out how to make the most of your federally recognized three-day weekend. For more ideas, check out our list of Memorial Day weekend events in Washington worth taking a road trip for and our food and drink guide.

Bluwater Bistro
Feast on a whole Dungeness crab, a side of summer potato salad, and corn on the cob for just $39 while taking in lake views at this Leschi waterfront spot.
Leschi
Pickup, delivery, dine-in

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Comedy Legend John Cleese Goes on the Offensive

Sockless comedy legend with lemur plush doll.
Sockless comedy legend with lemur plush doll. Cristi Russo

Although John Cleese's Monday night show at McCaw Hall was billed “An Evening of Exceptional Silliness,” I half expected an hour-plus of “old man yells at cloud crowd” material from the 82-year-old comedian, actor, and author. Blessedly, it wasn't that at all. Nor, thankfully, did my favorite Monty Python's Flying Circus member deliver a series of fish-out-of-water observations about his adopted home of Los Angeles—although surely he would have made tasty juice out of that low-hanging fruit.

True, there was a didactic, somewhat grumpy quality to some of Cleese's set. He went to pains to spotlight how unfunny “woke” jokes were, and to emphasize the idea that "good" humor must offend—or at least cheerfully mock—somebody, anybody. His examples of the former were truly duds, but he was quarter-assing it to tip the scales to prove his point. (In December 2021, Cleese huffily ended a BBC TV interview about “cancel culture” when the host broached the subject of Dave Chappelle.) But at his advanced age, Cleese is not about to go-all in on the cultural wars with people who could be his great-grandchildren. Although he views “wokeness” as an existential threat to humor, Cleese assuredly is not MAGA, and he got in some righteous barbs against The Former Guy.

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FINAL WEEKEND: It's Your Last Chance to Stream the Sexy Hot HUMP! Film Fest!

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ALERT! ALERT! You've got one more chance to get a streaming pass for the 2022 HUMP! Film Festival this weekend, May 26-29! This year's festival is packed with as much dirty, hilarious, eye-popping fun as we could squeeze into one 90 minute show. So grab those tickets now before it's too late!

As you undoubtedly know, HUMP! is the annual film festival where sexy amateur filmmakers share their lustiest five-minute dirty movies with the world. This delightfully sex-positive fest features all sorts of horny fun, including hardcore, softcore, live action, stop action, animated, musical, kinky, vanilla, straight, gay, lez, bi, trans, and genderqueer flicks that are guaranteed to have you squirming with glee!

SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? Stream HUMP! this weekend, May 26-29—it's your final chance!

Need more temptation? Check out the trailer:


This Year's Folklife Is Bringing Seattle an Impressively Diverse Understanding of What Folk Music Can Be

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The theme of this year’s Northwest Folklife festival is “Metamorphosis: In with the Old, In with the New,” so, really, in with everything. But not necessary indoors! If you’re still wary about gathering in enclosed areas (and good for you if you are, with transmission on the rise) there’s plenty of outdoor programming to keep it folksy all weekend. Stages will be scattered throughout the Seattle Center, with performances scheduled Friday through Monday. Highlights include a John Denver tribute/singalong, Lynn Applegate, Seattle Song Circle, Zydeco Lowdown, and an open drum circle —which is my worst nightmare, but to each their own.

Also on the menu are sea chanteys, cloggers and Irish step dancers, breakdancers, and klezmer ... Folklife is truly embracing folk traditions from around the world this year, rather than limiting themselves to a 1960s-style hootenanny. It's an excellent opportunity to learn and broaden your horizons while you party.

The 51st Annual Northwest Folklife Festival kicks off on Friday May 27 and runs through Monday May 30.


I, Anonymous: Put Your Fucking Masks Back on, You Fucking Lunatics


Did everyone stop reading the news about the novel SARS virus that’s still going around? You know, the novel SARS virus that’s still killing people, and still getting people really sick for like 10 days straight? The one that gives a certain percentage of people distressing symptoms for a long period of time — if not for the rest of their lives — for reasons we don’t quite understand yet?

I only ask because cases are rising, people are getting sick left and right, and yet mask compliance on buses, trains, and planes appears to be hovering at around 10 to 30% on a good day.

I hopped on a flight to Texas, and almost no one was wearing a mask at SeaTac, let alone in the airport in the south. On the plane, an unmasked flight attendant told an unmasked, elderly passenger that the end of the mask mandate meant she could finally see people smiling again. Not for long, you fucking psycho!

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NewsCityCops

Seattle Human Rights Commissioners Feel “Gagged” by City Attorney’s Office

And by gagged, they dont mean it in the fun, choking-on-tear-gas-at-a-protest kind of way.
And by "gagged," they don't mean it in the fun, choking-on-tear-gas-at-a-protest kind of way. RS

Based on some confusing and passive-aggressive exchanges between the City Attorney’s Office and the Seattle Human Rights Commission, it looks like officials in City Hall are trying to construct a narrative that would allow the Seattle Police Department to wash its hands of the reputation it’s earned from patterns of racial bias found in its policing and use-of-force practices.

The #OneSeattle story they apparently want to construct aims to show that the agency’s reforms have “worked,” and so the department no longer needs a federal judge to oversee any of its policies, as required by a Consent Decree it signed with the Department of Justice back in 2012. If a federal judge buys that argument and ends the oversight requirements, current City leaders would likely bathe in lots of positive press, and SPD would fully emerge from its long shadow.

The only problem? Several Human Rights Commissioners I’ve spoken with don’t believe that the judge is getting all the input he needs to make an informed decision.

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Slog AM: Elementary School Shooting Death Toll Climbs, Incumbency Trumps Trumpism, and Capitalism Comes for Juneteenth

A uniquely American part of parenting in 2022: waiting to find out if your child survived school that day
A uniquely American part of parenting in 2022: Waiting to find out if your child survived school that day Getty | Jordan Vonderhaar

First, the latest facts: The AP puts the latest casualty report from Robb Elementary School in Texas at 19 students and 2 adults, not including the shooter himself. The children shot were reportedly all in the same fourth grade classroom.

This is really where we're at, huh: I am begging every Congressional reporter to ask Joe Manchin exactly how many children need to die in protection of the filibuster. No one should care about his virtue signaling about the deficit until we know precisely how morally bankrupt he is.

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