A Seattleite's Guide to Surviving Winter with Weed

Trump's New Ransom Note to Democrats Is Dumb, Cruel, and It Should Be Rejected

This oaf gave another sneering, racist speech.
This oaf gave another sneering, racist speech. Pool / GETTY IMAGES

In a speech from the White House on Saturday afternoon, the President delivered a new ransom to Democrats: take a deal to extend protections for Dreamers and Temporary Protected Status recipients for three years and give him $5.7 billion for a "strategic deployment of physical barriers—or a wall," he said, or else he'll continue to withhold paychecks from federal employees.

He also wants Congress to pony up $800 million in "urgent humanitarian assistance"—which I'm guessing means disaster relief funds, $805 million for "drug detection technology" at the ports of entry, permission to deploy 2,750 new border agents, only 75 new "immigration judge teams," and a new system to allow "Central American minors to apply for asylum in their own countries," which is such a dumb and cruel idea I can't even believe he said it out loud. Asylum-seekers are fleeing gang violence and domestic violence. They're in constant and immediate danger. Is he seriously suggesting that we should have kids in Guatemala filling out U.S. Govt. paperwork and waiting around for some judge to determine whether or not the claim for asylum is reasonable? He is.

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A Tale of Two Fyre Festival Documentaries: Cheese Sandwiches, Schadenfreude, and Ja Rule

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Netflix

This week, streaming giants Hulu and Netflix dropped rival documentaries about Fyre Fest—the beautiful disaster that, in April 2017, practically imploded the internet with rich kid schadenfreude after an attendee posted a photo of a sad cheese sandwich. If you're not familiar (or need a refresher), the whole mess began when rapper Ja Rule and young entrepreneur/Fyre Media CEO Billy McFarland announced their plan to host a destination music festival to promote their music booking app.

Then a promotional video dropped featuring über-famous models like Kendall Jenner and Bella Hadid frolicking around an island in the Bahamas that the ad claimed was once owned by Colombian drug lord Pablo Escobar. It looked like Instagram incarnate—aquamarine waters, piña coladas, adorable beach pigs. Blink-182 and Major Lazer were booked to headline the festival. Attendees (who paid thousands of dollars for their tickets) were promised accommodations in luxury geodesic domes and meals cooked by celebrity chefs, along with water trampolines, yoga on the beach, and $1 million of real treasure and jewels hidden around the island. Instead, they got soggy FEMA tents and the infamous cheese sandwiches.

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Why Pain Sufferers Are Turning to CBD

Every day, millions of people suffer from chronic or injury-related pain. Until recently, the only options for dealing with moderate to severe pain involved addictive opioids, or pharmaceuticals that have their own laundry list of side effects, often outweighing the pain you suffer from in the first place. No longer.

Green Roads CBD offers a new path forward for people who want a natural alternative that works with your body instead of against it.


Dreamy, Warm, Homespun Fun with PETS at Barboza Today

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PETS is the brainchild of Richland, Washington-based artist Timothy Leingang. Playing songs written by Leingang, PETS’s music is poppy and jangly, funky, weird, and lovingly homespun. It inspires, if not a full-out, body-thumping boogie, then at least a gentle sway or light bob, or a single solitary booty roll.

Joining him at Barboza on Saturday night is the talented Ashley Eriksson, who you might recognize from the end credits theme song of the Cartoon Network show Adventure Time, playing some of the 100 disco songs she wrote in 2018. Seattle-based Ings will round out the lineup, a truly delightful musician whose tender and intimate love songs warm the cheeks and the heart.

Some media below.

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Slog PM: Mueller Team Contradicts BuzzFeed Report, the National Parks Are Suffering, Seattle Woman May Be Evicted Over $2

This is why we cant have nice things.
This is why we can't have nice things. Frank DeBonis/Getty

Slog PM tonight is brought to you buy a healthy dosage of CBD on the job: Kick back, it's the weekend! Soothe your joints and melt into your couch. You've earned it.

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In Washington, you can take drugs at work!

A post shared by Uh Oh (@chaseburnsy) on

Seattle woman might lose her home over $2: A 23-year-old woman failed to pay $2 of her rent last month. She's facing eviction. She and her three children may be homeless again. She may also lose her Section 8 housing, which pays for a good chunk of her rent, according to the Seattle Times. It's ridiculous that a landlord would spend the time and money—sometimes more than $1,000—to chase $2. That's cruel.

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The Sleeping Beauty – Just in time for Valentines at Pacific Northwest Ballet

You can keep scrolling, or taking recommendations from friends, or going out on a limb with a show that doesn't perfectly suit your tastes. Or...you could binge watch a ballet! Time-tested for over 100 years, The Sleeping Beauty is a treasured piece of entertainment with fairies that fly, live orchestra, and PNB dancers performing extraordinary feats of ballet majesty. 9 performances only at Seattle’s Center’s McCaw Hall.

Get Tickets Here


We Just Got a Letter to the Editor Calling Lester "Poopy Pants Snowflake"

Lester Black wrote about snowboarding in our 2019 High-brr-nation issue.
Lester Black wrote about snowboarding in our 2019 High-brr-nation issue. Aaron Bagley

We got a letter to the editor just now that I... don't quite understand. All I know is that Lester's previous nickname, "Soy Boy" (inspired by his piece about the Moonlight Cafe), has been supplanted by his new nickname, "Poopy Pants Snowflake" (inspired by his piece about snowboarding stoned).

The person who sent us this email is named Mark. (Why are they always named Mark?) Take it away, Mark:

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Federal Workers Demand Trump and Republicans End the Government Shutdown

Rep. Jayapal put a box of tissues on the lectern in case the workers teared up while telling their stories.
Rep. Jayapal put a box of tissues on the lectern in case the workers teared up while telling their stories. RS

Day 28 of the Trump shutdown, and we're at the point where tired, overworked, unpaid, pissed off federal workers are choking back tears at lecterns in Congressional offices.

At a press conference in Rep. Pramila Jayapal's office on Friday morning, a group of federal employees who haven't received a paycheck since late December gathered to tell their stories and to demand that Trump and Sen. Mitch McConnell end the shutdown immediately.

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Film/TVFood & DrinkMusicComedyWeedSPLIFF

Things to Do in Seattle When You're Stoned

Which pair of doughnuts is different from the others? Mmmm doughnuts...
Which pair of doughnuts is different from the others? Mmmm doughnuts... JESSICA STEIN

Seattle is a pretty cool place for stoners to hang in public. (Just as long as you don't get caught smoking pot in public—that's a $27 fine.) If you're like me, you probably enjoy most things more while under the influence, but here are some happenings that seem particularly attuned to those of us who've just smoked a fat doobie.


1. Succumb to the munchies


Chowing down after a nice smoke is a favorite high pastime, and there are three events coming up that speak to my rapacious soul. The three-day Seattle Wine and Food Experience is great and all, but it's the kickoff that's most worth mentioning: Comfort, a festival of "feel-good foods and crafty brews" (Thurs Feb 21, Sodo Park). Among the tasty selections from Seattle area gastropubs and taverns: fried chicken, mac and cheese, a Katsu Burger–run french fry bar (put the potato in my mouth, please), desserts, specialty cocktails, and plenty of craft beer and cider (be careful with the spins, friend).

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Dear Todd Herman: Maybe You Shouldn't Drive in Bus Lanes, Considering All Your Traffic Violations

Sir, its been four days since your last HOV lane violation.
Sir, it's been four days since your last HOV lane violation. avid_creative/Getty Images

Todd Herman, the KIRO Radio personality and author of "Dear Mike O'Brien: I drive my car in bus lanes all the time" is a bus-phobe. He hates them. In fact, he hates any mode of transportation that isn't sitting alone in his personal mini-pyramid: his car. Todd likes to drive in bus-only lanes and he doesn't care who knows it!

Driving in bus lanes may bring you an adrenaline rush, Todd, but, based on your records I pulled from King County, it also brings you a whole lot of tickets.

Looking at this long list, should you really be driving, Todd? I'm concerned for your safety.

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The Effortless Queer Pop of Babie

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Laura Rosenblatt

Not too long ago, I walked into the Beacon Hill joint Clock-Out lounge, bought a drink, found a seat, and, after about 30 minutes, Michael Lee appeared on the stage. He was alone, and held a guitar. The place was packed. He sang five of his own songs, and one cover. Now, how can I describe the music by Lee, who is also the guitarist for Young Evils? (His current solo project is called Babie, and he's set to release a full-length album under the moniker this summer.)

It's a pop that is as brutally honest as it is beautiful. And in this sense, it disarms you as much as the singer exposes himself: his hurt, hopes, hunger. His set ended too soon. One hopes that the next one at Chop Suey this upcoming Monday will not do the same.


Fuck Your Report, Seattle Is the Best Coffee City in the World

Jesse Nelson, the owner of Conduit Coffee in West Lake, pulls a shot on a Mavam espresso machines.
Jesse Nelson, the owner of Conduit Coffee in West Lake, pulls a shot on a Mavam espresso machine. Lester Black

There’s a new report making the rounds on the Internet right now that claims Seattle is not the best city for coffee lovers, instead giving that title to Berkeley, California. The survey, published by Apartment Guide, even puts Vancouver, Washington and San Francisco in front of Seattle, which is ranked fourth on the list.

You only need to know that this company is ranking Vancouver, Washington, a rather boring suburb of Portland, over Seattle to know this list is ridiculous. But if you look at how the company ranked each city the whole report loses all credibility. Apartment Guide didn’t actually try to measure which city has the best coffee, they only ranked different large cities based on the number of coffee shops in each city, as if a person who loves coffee is really just looking for the maximum number of options for getting coffee.

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Some Thoughts on Coming, Catholicism, and Making a Portrait of Trump Out of Dicks

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Recent Savage Love Letters of the Day: An arts patron seeks to donate dildos for Trump massive likeness; this guy isn't who he thought he was and this relationship isn't what she thinks it is; marriage, kids, furry porn, and the price of admission; and her sext-and-Skype boyfriend got busted by his wife and now he doesn't have time for her.

First, sometimes my advice sucks...

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We Should Ban Honking During the Seattle Squeeze

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zenstock/gettyimages.com

As clogs around the city become more and more intense during the "Seattle Squeeze," drivers are more and more losing their marbles. One example suffices to make my point: Yesterday at the corner of Denny Way and Westlake Avenue, men and women operating the most irrational mode of urban transportation ever conceived refused to believe they were stuck because others were stuck. What could not enter their minds was the idea that absolutely nothing could be done about the clog. Instead of imagining the system—of which they were a part—had hit a hard limit, they imagined the "bad driver." This mythical character took possession of their imaginations and would not let it go. The honking exploded in this and that car because each driver was possessed by the idea that one or some or all of these other drivers were the problem and not them or the form of transportation. But the bad Seattle driver is as useful to you, stuck in traffic, as the Greek god Hermes.

But for those who were waiting sensibly on the sidewalk for the 8 route bus, we could see what the drivers trapped in the limited language of their car could not see. The light ahead was red and so there was no use honking at other cars, those imagined bad drivers whose number could not stop multiplying in the minds of these car-locked drivers.

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Last-Minute Plans: 75 Free, Cheap & Easy Things To Do In Seattle This Weekend: Jan 18-20, 2019

Former Stranger staffer Devin Bannon will be serving up his best Klaus Nomi-inspired musical set (a teaser for his forthcoming show Alien/Angel) at this weekends New Wave Dance Party: A Klub Klaus Disco.
Former Stranger staffer Devin Bannon will be serving up his best Klaus Nomi-inspired musical set (a teaser for his forthcoming show Alien/Angel) at this weekend's New Wave Dance Party: A Klub Klaus Disco.

Panicking because you haven't yet made plans for the weekend and you're short on cash? Don't worry—below, find all of your options for last-minute entertainment that won't cost more than $10, ranging from New Wave Dance Party: A Klub Klaus Disco to the Winter Write-In with Write Our Democracy: State of the Union, and from the opening of Re:definition: Latinx Diaspora to the Womxn's March. For even more options, check out our complete Things To Do calendar, as well as our list of ways to celebrate MLK Day.

Stay in the know! Get all this and more on the free Stranger Things To Do mobile app (available for iOS and Android), or delivered to your inbox.

FRIDAY

COMMUNITY
1. Evening Beach Walk
Explore the creatures that hang out on the West Seattle beach at low tide with professional naturalists.
(West Seattle, free)

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Adam Smith and Pramila Jayapal Take on Trump

Will everything change now that Democrats have taken control of the US House of Representatives? That depends on what our elected officials actually do with their power—and the decisions of two Seattle Democrats are key.

One of those Democrats, Congressman Adam Smith, just took control of a powerful House committee that oversees the US military, and he's already been using the opportunity to tangle with Trump on national television.

The other, Congresswoman Pramila Jayapal, just landed a seat on the House Judiciary Committee, which will play a central role in the consideration of any articles of impeachment against President Trump. Jayapal also recently secured a commitment from new Democratic House Speaker Nancy Pelosi to hold the first-ever hearings on Medicare for All.

Here's more on what Seattle voters should be watching for from Smith and Jayapal.

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MusicVideo

Pickathon Starlight Series, Episode 3: Wild Child

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Peter Lovera
I know it feels like January out there, but trust me, Pickathon season is just about to start heating up. The lineup announcement party takes place this weekend, and here to get you in the mood is the latest video from our Pickathon Starlight Series, in which we spotlight the nocturnal after-hours performances of the Starlight Stage, filmed late at night after the main stages call it a day. Today's episode features Austin, Texas band Wild Child and their sultry rendition of "Expectations."

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