It's Tuesday, April 28, and a week from today, the outdoors will partially reopen. That's how bleak this downside-up, outside-in world is.
Given the choas, The Stranger has not been able to independently confirm that Miss Texas is actually "the" attorney general of drag, but she certainly seems to think she is.
"You might be having a rough go of it right now," the attorney general of drag says in her message. "There's a lot of stuff in the air. The ozone layer. Children's cartoons. Cashews."
To help you get through the haze of despair and cashews, she's prepared a list of "fun" "ideas" of things to do in quarantine:
Hahahaha. Tip Miss Texas right now, that was amazing.
Miss Texas describes herself as "part drag queen, part clown, and 100% considerate ball of chaos." Where does her name come from? She says:
"Miss Texas 1988" came about when a bartender insulted a gaudy blue and silver dress I was wearing by saying I looked like "Miss Texas 1988." I proudly took the title and the bartender is a lovely friend of mine. For me, the name represents all of the conflicting, campy, violent, hopeful, desperate, prideful, and bombastic components of "glamor" and "success"—wrapped in anachronism, feminism, and very cheap earrings.
On April 30, Miss Texas will be part of the Subkulture livestream for the Capitol Hill Arts Streaming Festival. On the same day, she will be in the streaming party for TUSH (the drag show that usually happens at the Clock-Out Lounge).
She's also usually in R Place's Lashes: Living Room Edition which streams on weekends at 10 pm.
Thank you so much for the message, Miss Tex—er, Madame Attorney General!!
May we all have a little better luck than you did finding things to do today. (If you need ideas, start here.)
Don't inject disinfectants, kids.
Previously in this series: